Eminem, SlaughterHouse and Yelawolf – ‘2.0 Boys’
This collective is what those Dr.Dre headphones were made for.
Rap nerds unite! Six uber lyrical rappers in a pissing contest on tape. Elliott Wilson was right when he TWitted that this song here would have raps fans shitting on their keyboards. Rockabye Review stays on they grizzly. They transcribed the entire song for review by the internets. Let’s do some math and see who built the sickest verse.
Understand that each rapper’s verse is like a jigsaw puzzle and the complexity of each puzzle rises with the addition of polysyllabic words. These words have to be inserted into the rapper’s bars properly for the puzzle to fit. We’ll crunch the numbers and see if our ears tell us the same thing that the arithmetic does.
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Royce da 5’9″ Total word count = 170 Polysyllabic words = 10 Longest word = hieroglyphics Avg. = 17.0 |
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Eminem Total word count = 223 Polysyllabic words = 9 Longest word = Illuminati Avg. = 24.75 |
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Joell Ortiz Total word count = 200 Polysyllabic words = 5 Longest word = definitively Avg. = 40.0 |
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Joe Budden Total word count = 194 Polysyllabic words = 7 Longest word = cesspoolers Avg. = 27.7 |
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Crooked I Total word count = 157 Polysyllabic words = 8 Longest word = psychotic Avg. = 19.625 |
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Yelawolf Total word count = 291 Polysyllabic words = 9 Longest word = Illuminati Avg. = 32.33 |
Royce pwned this track by his average score and Joell Ortiz came in last average wise, but the Joell Ortiz verse was the more sonically creative and the Yelawolf verse was just a ginormous feast off the track. In terms of impact I would score the song like this…
1. Royce
2. Crooked
3. Yela
4. Ortiz
5. Em
6. Budden
Yeah, Budden felt like he knew he lost before he even started rhyming. And of course Eminem’s longest word was “illuminati”. Accurate breakdown here, DPZ.
How did Yela get extra bars and still didn’t “kill it”?
Pissing contest? I wonder which emcee would win in a j.o.c. (jackoff contest contest)? Pause! Seriously, the faster you spit, the quicker uou cum. Smfh…
“great,” six fucking MCs, five and a half of whom are nearly retarded, including the two white boys yapping “illuminati” nonsense; pandering to conspiracy fools or just dumb?
while i appreciate the effort of posts like this, it’s more proof– (and dead proof is >>>> all slaughterhouse, even if em’s tribute to him sucked) that by far most of hip-hop ‘culture’ (sic) in 2011 is an aesthetic, and intellectual failure. that’s FINE– but let’s stop pretending otherwise: Ghost and Sean Price are the great, never-let-us-down exceptions, of course.
***
You will not be able to stay home, brother.
You will not be able to plug in, turn on and cop out.
You will not be able to lose yourself on skag and skip,
Skip out for beer during commercials,
Because the revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be brought to you by Xerox
In 4 parts without commercial interruptions.
The revolution will not show you pictures of Nixon
blowing a bugle and leading a charge by John
Mitchell, General Abrams and Spiro Agnew to eat
hog maws confiscated from a Harlem sanctuary.
The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be brought to you by the
Schaefer Award Theatre and will not star Natalie
Woods and Steve McQueen or Bullwinkle and Julia.
The revolution will not give your mouth sex appeal.
The revolution will not get rid of the nubs.
The revolution will not make you look five pounds
thinner, because the revolution will not be televised, Brother.
There will be no pictures of you and Willie May
pushing that shopping cart down the block on the dead run,
or trying to slide that color television into a stolen ambulance.
NBC will not be able predict the winner at 8:32
or report from 29 districts.
The revolution will not be televised.
There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down
brothers in the instant replay.
There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down
brothers in the instant replay.
There will be no pictures of Whitney Young being
run out of Harlem on a rail with a brand new process.
There will be no slow motion or still life of Roy
Wilkens strolling through Watts in a Red, Black and
Green liberation jumpsuit that he had been saving
For just the proper occasion.
Green Acres, The Beverly Hillbillies, and Hooterville
Junction will no longer be so damned relevant, and
women will not care if Dick finally gets down with
Jane on Search for Tomorrow because Black people
will be in the street looking for a brighter day.
The revolution will not be televised.
There will be no highlights on the eleven o’clock
news and no pictures of hairy armed women
liberationists and Jackie Onassis blowing her nose.
The theme song will not be written by Jim Webb,
Francis Scott Key, nor sung by Glen Campbell, Tom
Jones, Johnny Cash, Englebert Humperdink, or the Rare Earth.
The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be right back after a message
bbout a white tornado, white lightning, or white people.
You will not have to worry about a dove in your
bedroom, a tiger in your tank, or the giant in your toilet bowl.
The revolution will not go better with Coke.
The revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath.
The revolution will put you in the driver’s seat.
The revolution will not be televised, will not be televised,
will not be televised, will not be televised.
The revolution will be no re-run brothers;
The revolution will be live.
AGAIN crooked has the shortest verse yet STILL kills everyone on the track
that’s some serious mental masturbation you’re doing there junior.
Can you really understand what yella is sayin?