Whenever I think of Christmas I think of having a few days off from work to run around my apartment naked and chase my girlfriend. In the end Christmas is the celebration of childbirth. And how do you make a child in the first place (don’t answer this if your MARY CHENEY)?

If the infant baby JESUS could chose any womb to exit from I’ll lay odds that he’d chose one of these wombs that I want to enter…

After watching SCARLETT in ‘Match Point’ is when I knew I would have to get me some of that yum-yum-ooo-tang. She was licking her lips and rolling her eyes and just playing the role of a sexy whore. I was never really checking for her too tough at first because she didn’t have an azz as plump as ANGELINA, and she didn’t have that ‘Norway stunner’ look that UMA rocks, but now I have come full circle and I’m giving mad props to Ms. JOHANSSON.

Remember when everybody was saying that CIARA had a penis? It turned out that she has an extra large labia which isn’t even that uncommon after all. Plus you know Bow Wow was too busy fucking around with video games and toys instead of wearing this young tail out like he should have been. CIARA is begging to be worn out like a pair of Payless pumps. She wants you to throw her around and pee on her six pack stomach. Good for you CIARA that I just drunk four cups of green tea and my bladder is having wild spasms. Let’s bang it up lil’ mama.

tricia TRICIA HELFER a/k/a Number 6
This is my little futuristic intergalactic cyborg beat box. If you aren’t fucking with Battlestar Galactica yet you need to get up on that shit. This chick alone makes the program worth watching. She’s a total cocktease and a kick azz malevolent bitch all wrapped up in the same package. The best part is that she’s a robot so if you wanted to azz rape her with a leather belt around her neck it wouldn’t be a crime, because technically, robots aren’t considered human even if they have a soul.

A few years back DENZEL turned out this little fine piece of chocolate tail so badly that she had to go get ‘Something New’. SANAA filled the void in Black cinema that NIA LONG had on smash in the early 1990’s. I’m not saying that NIA motherfucking LONG couldn’t still get her weave pulled while I aired her out from behind, but SANAA is just a little more sexy with her clef chin.

In my book a clef chin = cum cup.


vanessa williams VANESSA WILLIAMS
Ugly Betty’s boss, VANESSA WILLIAMS, is forever my lady like that Jodeci song, except I won’t be kidnapping her and burning Newport cigarettes on her nipples like Mr.Dalvin does, allegedly. She was my first Valentine love. I’ve been patiently waiting for VANESSA for over twenty years and I will wait another twenty if that’s what it takes for her to be mine. I can see myself giving Miss America (that’s what I call her) a sponge bath when she’s 80. She is going to be fine for all of eternity.

14 Responses to “MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM SCARLETT JOHANSSON’s Crotchless Panties…”

  1. RD says:

    dallas I’ve got to give up to you, Big poppa (no lil wayne), you’re on a tear with these posts. Soon enough, these mags are going to come crawling.


  2. the_dallas says:


  3. scarlett got some tig ol’ bitties. im still waiting for her to pull a swordfish halle.

  4. LM says:


    Funny how I just came from church and these “Merry Christmas From…” posts provide “more to think about this Christmas season” (as the preachers et al say) than anything I’ve heard there for a while. (Not that I’ve been too much lately.)

  5. You are NOT well…but I love you anyway!

    Merry Christmas to you and yours…

  6. Amadeo says:

    Scarlett had a little booty in The Island…unless that was camera tricks.

    Sanaa still owes me for not going topless and having all those Wesley Snipes ass shots in that one movie.

  7. sangano says:

    your dead on with Scarlett and Sanna..not familiar with that other wasp piece…however my pick of the litter would def be Ciara.

    reminds me of my one Sierra Leonian piece i had (albeit darker)…my brotha, a body so toned and a booty so plump and a firm i had to almost pry the cheeks open when doin my thing…if u kno u kno

  8. Vik says:

    damn dallas,
    the holidays have kept me busy, but you have been tearin up the internets. its gonna take some time to really read your posts.

    cum cup….did you just say that?

  9. esbee says:

    I cosign all the draft picks on this ‘ere post

    Merry Christmas y’all!

  10. Tiffany says:

    Love Sanaa, Vanessa is always beautiful.

  11. Candice says:

    My husband watches Ugly Betty and he claims it is strictly for glimpses of Vanessa Williams (his original first love) and Selma Hayek in her underwear.

  12. Amadeo says:

    Wait they show Hayek in her drawls!?!?!??!

  13. ELOHEEM STAR says:

    “CIARA is begging to be worn out like a pair of Payless pumps.”

    CC is my new Muse.

    Vanessa Williams has that rare blend of Class, talent and beauty not seen in the majority of today’s mainstream artist. I slept on her early but she’s the real deal.

  14. Candice says:

    Amadeo…she is the Executive Producer of Ugly Betty and for a few episodes, Salma was on in a bra and panties….my husband was about to Tivo…LOL

Leave a Reply