And from all the other cRappers that I didn’t have to listen to in 2006. By remaining under your proverbial rocks you unwittingly kept Hip-Hop alive. Here’s to the hopes that you all give the same present in the new year which is the lack of your presence on any rap records.

Being voted the ‘Weed Carrier of the Year‘ or some such might be the only award dude will ever win. It’s not like he’s a bad rapper either but he lacks charisma so badly that you can’t listen to him for more than 8 bars at a time. Like 8 bars every two years. That should be one of the commandments created to keeping Hip-Hop alive. MEMPH BLEEK is allowed to guest on a record only once every twenty four months.

TIMBALAND has a bag of tricks and gimmicks that Hip-Hop fans are finally fed up with. I just hope he gave dude enough money to fix his Dodge Charger with the Confederate flag on the top. You never have to be a certain color or background to be authentic to Hip-Hop. You just have to be… Authentic.

jones MAGOO
Another TIMBALAND bag carrier (no MISSY ELLIOT) that I can do without for the upcoming calendar year. I imagine that he’s a cool cat and all, but to have a voice that sounds like your sucking on helium is better suited for cartoon voiceovers. It’s time to stop letting TIMBALAND make a mockery of Hip-Hop music by bringing clowns and rejects into the industry. I’m sure there’s some Black kid in a Virginia prep school watching ‘The Wire’ that TIMBALAND has yet to produce. Why am I encouraging him?

This cat brought NOTHING original to the game. If you own an MC EIHT album I give you permission to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge.
lil weazle

the wire FOXY BROWN
I don’t want to hear FOX BOOGIE BROWN next year and she already can’t hear me. How’s that for ironic symmetry? My real problem with FOXY?!? Who remembers that math equation she butchered in the ‘Affirmative Action’ single.

“Thirty-two grams raw, chop it in half, get sixteen, double it times three.
We got forty-eight, which mean a whole lot of cream.
Divide the profit by four, subtract it by eight. We back to sixteen”

WTF?!? This fugazi arithmetic is why rappers are always going broke!

11 Responses to “MERRY CHRISTMAS From MEMPHIS BLEEK’s Fitted Cap…”

  1. T.R.B says:

    that post was bananas! (definitely no ashanti) and i seriously thought i was the only one who thought jamming def’s finest fucked up that math! i was like in 8th grade and not even all that hot in fractions thinking this bitch is loony… and a raggedy rapper. good post though

  2. SordidPuppy says:

    production on “we come strapped” — “hard times,” “take 2 with me,” etc. — is classic. and you know this.

  3. Dude, you didn’t hear, around 97, Magoo had a sex change and become Missy Elliot…that’s why no one’s heard of him in years..

    re: the last post. Don’t know if you’ve watched the “Stuntin Like My Daddy” video but it makes the lyrics like fucking Voltaire. Plus, it just re-affirms that fact that no man should ever call another man who isn’t his father “daddy.” Best part about the whole thing, as dumb as those lyrics are, shit’s still probably being ghost-written…

  4. Gee says:

    I would rather listen to Bubba while I lay in my medically induced coma than any of the shyte currently being pumped out in the name of hiphop…

  5. Eloheem Star says:

    They tried every angle possible to make Bubba Sparxx Blow. I thought it would eventually work. Jay Z said if Bleek was associated with any other rapper in the game he would be a ….wait for it….. He would be a SUPERSTAR. I spit Johnny Walker Black out I laughed so hard.
    I think Nas is responsible for writting that infamous Foxy Brown unquotable; check the flow on that verse.

  6. mrkamoji says:

    Dallas you know what is crazy Mos Def and Bleek on a track and Bleeks shines harder. Things done change left is right and right is left. Check that 9th Wonder Crooklyn Dodgers track if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

  7. spotrusherz aka respect my moustache says:

    damn homie i agree with the rest but why eiht? wtf that was unnecessary

  8. Candice says:

    Is it me or does Foxy always look dirty?

  9. kaos says:

    I always wondered if anyone else heard that math fuckery on Affirmative Action.

    I understand dividing the profit by 4 (nas az her cormega)
    but why did she have to subtract it by 8?

    Thats why your broke you deaf dumb whore.

  10. That is a great tip particularly to those new to the blogosphere. Simple but very precise information… Appreciate your sharing this one. A must read article!

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