How boring has the NBA become now that PATRICK EWING-MICHAEL JORDAN-CHARLES BARKLEY have retired? It is as exciting now as watching two elderly people spoon each other. As a matter of fact, there is less action in the NBA.
And why can’t MAGIC JOHNSON just hire a speech therapist? He is richer than GOD himself. MAGIC is so rich that he has cured himself of the AIDS, but he can’t help himself from sounding like a confused sharecropper when he reads from the teleprompter. When MAGIC and BARKLEY are in the studio together I just have to close my eyes and I could swear that I have AMOS & ANDY on the television.
And since when did all of these weird Europeans and foreigners come into the league. France, Slovenia, Croatia, Puerto Rico and Argentina have people playing in the Finals while classic urban centers like New York City, Chicago and Detroit(yes, Detroit) are mysteriously under-represented as far as player’s hometowns go. I blame rap music for this. All the jiggs that would normally play basketball are in the recording studio making rap albums. The situation is so dire that All-Star NBA player, RON ARTEST, took a leave of absence from his team to promote his gangsta rap album.
This is a call to all my weblog readers. As a public service to all the young jigg boys that we may encounter in our daily travels I am pleading with you to inform them how lucrative being an NBA player can be. Remind them of the potential perks like having a B.M.(baby momma) in every city that you play in, and possibly having a set of car wheels named after you. If we can’t get more good strong jigg boys back into the league soon with names that I can pronounce, I will have to start watching NASCAR. There is no way that NASCAR would let some Serbian Albanian race a car in their sport. Even the water fountains in pit row are still segregated.