hypermax red tennis balls

Editor’s note: As an additional feature to the SFU program I would like to start a kicks consultation service here where we discuss acquisitions and debate the merits or detractions of copping that next-next hotness. To kick off this features inaugural drop we pick up the line from Chi-town kicksologist, Slumbilical Chord.

Nikestore has the Hypermax NFW red suede jawnts aka what I like to call the “Nike Air Su-woos” aka the “Nike Air Bloodeds” aka the “Nike Air Starhead Birdmans Daddy…BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRR” for $99.99

Should a brother go in? The full sole air joint is fiyar. Plus the bright red colorway screams “I’m blooding…but only while being a blood is culturally accepted, as my gang affiliations change with, among other things, the wind. Additionally, I will never set foot in hoods where my bloodedness could be called into question — thence, I will never have to supply the requisite handshake or appropriate gang sign. I can scream SUWOO and DADA-DOH from the comfort of my gentrified Chicago townhome.”

Thoughts? At this price, a brother is fiending to punch in the four digit confirmation code on his Amex and hit “BUY NOW,” but in the depths of a possible double dip recession (fuck is that btw? How you gon’ refer to an economic contraction followed by a slight recovery followed by another severe economic contraction by a name that connotes a Ben ‘n Jerry’s ice cream treat? Double Dip – it’s like two scoops of creamy delight! [ll]), well, let’s just say I have my doubts (c) Catholics. Please advise…

Warmest Regards,

albshoes Guest Editor Al B. Shoes
I need you to hold tight. That price is gonna dip like our economy is projected to. I feel like they will be available for $59.99 by February. Yes, Black History Month specials (while not listed as such) are the supreme comeups of the entire year. Think of all the Christmas returns combined with a bunch of companies under pressure to post some half-decent numbers for the new year’s 1st quarter.

Unless you are looking to strike fear about your gang relations at some wintertime indoor pick-up league I vote for you to hold tight on this acquisition until the pricepoint enters come-up status (59.99 and under)

BTW, SlumBeast > Hypebeast

16 Responses to “SNEAKER FIENDS UNITE!”

  1. Slumbilical says:

    Word up, I also blood pretty hard in these jawns:

    I can’t lie though, these still haven’t seen the light of day. Gotta keep them soles stupid icey.

    The black 3M Jordo’s that came in this pack are pretty weak but the BLURRRRRRRRRRMAN Jordan 5s are nerdboy collector shtatus, just like my Carmines, which are also Blud-rific.


  2. Slumbilical says:

    LMAO at Al B…I never really noticed the unibrow — Black sex symbols look mad Teh Ghey in retroshpek.

  3. king blair says:

    They hot but i need a different colorway for the soles white soles look like shit after 2 wears

  4. SlumBeezy,
    This gonna sound crazy but hit up the Publix or Kroger around your way and grab up the Ziploc salad freezer bags. Take your J’s out of that tissue paper because it will yellow the icey clear outsole.

    I keep mah deadstock joints with icey bottoms in those freezer bags

  5. Slumbilical says:

    Oh shit my wife has tons of those freezer bags…*goes in*.

  6. Slumbilical says:

    Btw the black 2010s with the light blue trim (no princess leia) are sick – they almost have a space jam shwag about them…might haffa cop on the lowlow.

  7. You know Al B. Shoes is down south when he’s talking Publix FTW… Kroger I don’t fucks with the same except they have a couple 24 hour spots that are useful.

    Shoes, you ever hit an Ingles? Decent salad bar helps roughage out too much bbq chicken.

  8. $ykotic/Don McCaine says:

    Yo Slumbilical I seen those in all black.

    Beaverton Nike FTW(don’t worry dP I’m checking your wish list on the reg).

    The Ziploc remedy is 100.

  9. Tony Grands says:

    Al B. Sure has the most awesome uni-brow in the entertainment business. That shit can have a career by itself. Like a dancing caterpillar.

  10. Tony Grands says:

    “Al B. Shoes”

    If the Bundy’s had the ‘net on that big ass Tandy Computer they kept by the basement door in the latter episodes, post-Steve Rhodes, yet pre-Marcy admitted she’s a lez in real life, that would’ve been Al’s screen name.

  11. Grand Master says:

    $100? that aint sfu fresh.

    wait till they drop to less than 40% retail then cop. OUT.

  12. fosterakahunter says:

    Unless they have multiple pair, you may have to jump on these joints like now.

  13. fosterakahunter says:

    Btw, I just found the only pair of the tennis-bass joints for sale in the country, but for the retail. You thought I wasn’t when I was?

  14. Nattiez02 says:

    Is anyone else fucking bothered by the fact that the man said his gang affiliations change like the wind? Im am not banging and dont really know too many that are but i think someone who first off, claims a gang should be official (thought i think weak in general terms) at the very fucking least and changing affiliation like the wind is PUSSY, its like but much worse to me than Jets fans that wear Giants Jackets cause it matches your kicks, SORRY YOURE PUSSY…………….. Wear some other shit but dont wear shit that means serious shit to others cause you are far enough away to “get away with it” thats FOUL and there will be a time where SOMEONE is going to check you. Additionally, as whack as gangs can be, what the fuck are you doing FAKE banging………… that shit just rubs me the wrong way, its one thing to truly be ignant, maybe you can be helped but faking ignant with something that serious is actually fucking stupid and niggas need to stop the bullshit. you are the reason why square young kids get capped playing that silly fucking FAKE GANG game……..STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    ” I will never have to supply the requisite handshake or appropriate gang sign. I can scream SUWOO and DADA-DOH from the comfort of my gentrified Chicago townhome.”

    WTF??????????????? Not one of you all called this dude pussy? are there any real Bloods on here. again im not a gang member and never have been but i think that shit is mad WHACK!!!!!

    Dont claim what you are not, that goes for fake NY niggas, fake island niggas, shit, fake as wiggers too. there are plenty of real ones, noone needs fakers……….

  15. Nattiez02 says:

    on the sneakerhead tip though. you can pass on the hunned. they will go down, but as my mans said, sizes and numbers could get you,especially if there are other actual sets around who find them bangin

  16. Nattiez02 says:

    after thinking about it, i went a bit hard with that. i mentor likkle yutes and this subject is serious with them and its something i have to combat with them all of the time. kids are getting killed behind those same issues. i apologize if i offended anyone and to the poster….it shouldnt be about going after folks, i could have openned a dialogue as opposed to going in


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