WIG OWNERS > WIG BRUSHERS: The LIBERACE Edition

liberace

Show that Wig Owner LIBERACE some respect. He would rather die from the AIDS than let you see him without his wig right. Chances are that your grandma wanted to brush his wig too.

liberace

LIBERACE brought the bling to the Wig Owning game too. Full length furs and hand jewelry that are inspiring young DipSetters to this very day. LIBERACE used his somewhat sketchy musical talent and tremendous pop music appeal to transorm himself into an international Wig Owner. No one really knows who brushed LIBERACE’s wigs, but we can all agree that he owned many. You can see LIBERACE’s influence on some of today’s popular music Wig Owners…

keys

ALICIA KEYS = WIG OWNER
Just like LIBERACE, sketchy piano talent plus tons of mass appeal have given Mrs.KEYS a lot of wigs to be brushed, and no one really knows for sure who brushes ALICIA’s wigs, but I have my suspicions

kerry keys KRUCIAL KERRY KEYS = ALLEGED WIG BRUSHER
Also known as MC Hat 2 Big he has been photographed holding ALICIA’s arm from time to time. This is one Wig Brusher that we like to call a ‘Beard’. And I’m not talking goatee, you hear me Mz.Peaches?

piddy PUFF DIDDY = WIG OWNER
Just when you think this fool done ran out of wigs… BAM! Take that, take that.

kim KIM PORTER = ALL STAR WIG BRUSHER
This Wig Brusher makes little babies out of nappy Yak tracks. When AL B. SURE lost all the moisture and lustre from his ‘good hair’ wig KIM PORTER went and got herself a Bad Boy

misa MISA HYLTON-BRIM = WIG BRUSHER’s WIG BRUSHER
If Wig Brusher’s ever form a union, MISA will be like the shop steward or something.

brit BRITNEY SPEARS = WIG OWNER
Whenever she wants to buy some new wigs she just sells pictures of her unborn fetus to People magazine.

brit KEVIN FEDERLINE-SPEARS = WIG BRUSHER
You don’t easily go from backup dancer to Wig Owner. J-HO did it, but look where her dancer husband ended up, and isn’t that dude that seeded Madonna back to returning cans and bottles in order to pay his rent?

janet JANET JACKSON = WIG OWNER
Miss JACKSON has been accumulating wigs since her days on ‘Good Times’.

bigfoot baby girl JERMAINE DUPRI = WIG BRUSHER
He studied well, and learned just the right amounts of moisturizer that the JACKSON family requires.

hustle

Did anyone peep the OPRAH last week where JANET JACKSON brought out JERMAINE DUPRI but he wasn’t allowed to speak?!? It’s not like J.D. has no talent at all either. He helped MARIAH CAREY get her wigs tight again. I feel like telling dude to man the fuck up, but then again, he seems kind of happy.

You know who stays on some perpetual happy shit? Supreme cultural hustler RUSSELL SIMMONS be on that cash money wig owner yoga shit like what. He got so many wigs he don’t even need to wear one, but if he did you better believe it would be brushed like a motherfucker.

hustle

hustle RUSSELL SIMMONS = WIG OWNER
From Def Jam to the Phat Farm, RUSSELL knows how to make jigs spend that loot. He has followed in the steps of wig owners like BERRY GORDY Jr. and QUINCY JONES to establish himself as one of the al time great hustlers of Black music and culture.

miss kay KIMORA LEE SIMMONS = WIG BRUSHER
A more sassy wig brusher you’d be hard pressed to find. She’s so high maintenance that she even needs her own wig brusher.

paris MISA HYLTON-BRIM = WIG BRUSHER’s WIG BRUSHER
Have brush, will travel.

20 Responses to “WIG OWNERS > WIG BRUSHERS: The LIBERACE Edition”

  1. Candice Says:

    LMAO @ Misa Hylton Brim….the Shop Steward of the wig brushers union.

  2. Candice Says:

    and how disturbing are those two veins in Kim Porter’s forehead?

  3. Combat Jack Says:

    ^ “and how disturbing are those two veins in Kim Porter’s forehead?”

    Anyone see “Scanners”?

  4. SANGANO Says:

    RUSSELL SIMMONS be on that cash money wig owner yoga shit like what. He got so many wigs he don’t even need to wear one, but if he did you better believe it would be brushed like a motherfucker.

    my man, you are GOLDEN in MY book!

  5. Alex2.0 Says:

    okay so the rolling stones graphic on her t-shirt kinda goes hand in hand with your belief that A.Keys is a “lick ‘em low” lover. ha! but since you live in nyc, you have to at least have some better proof she luvs da ladies. i’m just sayin…

    and dang, you could’ve at least put kim porter’s one modeling shot on here to show she sort of had a career at some point. dang dp…so cold!
    http://www.westonsinternet.co.uk/images/awcn01.jpg

  6. Hov Lost Says:

    whats really good?? Shit, Alicia keys got thick though.

  7. the_dallas Says:

    Hey Family! My 9 2 5 has been so crack these last couple of weeks I’m surprised that I’ve been able to churn out any posts. If my shit is getting corny let me know. I heard that y’all are ready for the Real Talk True NYC Stories and I have one for y’all. Otherwise, let me know if the content is getting corn crunch.

    Why did nobody peep Russell Rush’s wig chinstrap?!?

  8. Amadeo Says:

    Good look for putting me down with the HYLTON-BRIM chick. I tagged her as a wig brusher before I ever knew about the term.

  9. Tiffany Says:

    LMAO at Russ’ drawn on wig/beard….straight hustler…what ever happened to his Credit/Debit Card “line”?….LMAO

  10. BV Liz Says:

    Hysterical. Got me rolling.

  11. miss ahmad Says:

    where does Little Richard fit into all of this?

  12. Candice Says:

    Miss Ahmad….Little Richard is a true wig owner. His stuff and style has been getting jacked for years. He is the ORIGINATOR, as he likes to remind us. WOOOOOOO!

  13. prynsex Says:

    This was some serious shyyt! LMFAO

    “He got so many wigs he don’t even need to wear one”

    Off the chain!

  14. Antagonista Says:

    Hilarious! Russell’s wig killed it.

  15. 40 Dawg: The Light-Skinned Richard Roundtree Says:

    Can I get a possible DP column that has a West Side Story-esque showdown between the Wig Brushers and the Weed Carriers?

    Plus Jimmy Iovine is probably the illest, even his Wig Brushers/Weed Carriers have similar staff four times removed.

    Level 1: Jimmy

    Level 2:Dre

    Level 3:Snoop – Em

    Level 4:Dogg Pound – D12 – Urban Action Coon (aka Curtis Jackson)

    Level 5:Eastsiders – Minstrel Unit

    (et al)

    I mean this a billion dollar conglomerate right here…

  16. Vik Says:

    DP, What’s good?

    Since when did you need our approval? This post was fire. End of story. I feel your 9 2 5 pain. Damn, at least your postin..

    tomorrow hits, i’m good…FINALLY, i am going to FREEDOM. blogger jumpoff.

  17. ebz Says:

    What’s a wig owner and wig brusher? i’m lost lol

  18. Doc Says:

    i dont know about the misa one…funny…2 funny

  19. who cares Says:

    cat, leroy, and assilee killed micheal jackson all of them are involed i’ve lost my ovaries cause of them.

    your welcome,
    Donna

    P.s. that’s why there catching these diseases to.

  20. donna Says:

    Help there killing in Hollywood

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