If you find yourself in a Barnes & Noble or Borders bookstore this weekend thumb through the recent copy of XXL magazine featuring NAS/YOUNG JEEZY as the alternate covers. On page 107 they list DALLASPENN.COM as the fourth of the top ten Hip-Hop blogs on the internet. They even gave us the backhanded compliment for posting “stream of conciousness rants”. What the fuck is that about?!? I thought we were serious journalists over here (no JASON BLAIR). Considering that the top three bloggers are all employees of XXL mag I think that makes us the top blog that isn’t on the payroll. I’ve got a special prize for anyone that doesn’t buy the magazine, but rips the page out of the mag and mails it to me.
SHOWBEE and the Showstoppers are singlehandely keeping the Association relavent. Just last night Young Rapist ran through the Utah Jazz as if they were a piece of young white poon on summer break, scoring early and often. SHOWBEE’s getting his points and more importantly Los Angeles is getting their wins. Say what you want to about DWAYNE, LeBRON and CARMELO, but SHOWBEE is the king of the court. It’s not just because he plays in a major market city either because dude would still be compelling even if he played in Memphis. I think it’s because he’s so earnest. Right now SHOWBEE is to the NBA what GAYME is to rap music. He’s the hottest shit on wax and compared to him SHAQUILLE O’NEAL is just an old head trying to stay in the game. Another similarity to GAYME is that they both whine like petulant children. Neither of them want for anything, but they still live life with a chip on their shoulder. If another championship is what it will take to make SHOWBEE happy he is going to have to wait a few more years. It’s all about Dallas right now…
Did I say that 2006 was going to be Dallas’ year? Alright, let me change that now to 2007. Anything named Dallas is going to be the shit in 2007 and you should get on the bandwagon now. The Dallas Mavericks are streaking through the NBA because they have the sluttiest cheerleaders. These are the kinds of broads that will sniff an 8-ball of DWIGHT GOODEN’s white pudding off each other’s backsides. MICHAEL IRVIN type chicks. Ask your girl Unruly Brown. She used to be one knows these broads.
Jay-Z came up with the crazy idea of having septuagenarian cheerleaders at Nets’ games during the holidays. One of those ladies is actually in her eighties too. This is a sick idea if these old biddies are hot. Can you imagine getting some sweet action from a hot great-grandma? Her lips prah’lee hang lower than a JIBBS chain. She has to fold them up just to put her drawls on. That’s what’s up. With Jay-Z coming out of retirement I guess he figures everyone else should too. I can’t wait to see the halftime show at the All-Star game next year in Las Vegas. Who wants to bet it’s gonna be EARTHA KITT in a catsuit?
This kind of insight isn’t available at SI.com, ESPN.com, deadspin or anywhere else. Thank you DP. I’ll check out XXL at a CVS. It’ll be the fifth time I’ve opened an issue.
Best Hip Hop Blog in the XXL… that explains why dudes is posting Bio’s in the comment section.
kobee is a dick….whoever changes their number to 24…umm…just..because is a dick. He’s MJ’s wig carrier for realz….
HA. I see you got mad jokes today, don’tcha!!!!! Tryna be all slick wit’ the strikethrough and thangz. As for them hos, they might see me in the street …
i respect kobe cause dude got away wit rape.now that’s gangsta. he hit that raw.
lovin the money/even more than the black man loves the white girl’s punani/kobe/kobe
kobe kobe kobe keep bangin on the white girl
i may have to visit a b and n just to rip out them xxl pages.
where’s the scan of page 107???
“kobee is a dick….whoever changes their number to 24…umm…just..because is a dick. He’s MJ’s wig carrier for realz….”
I agree Bessy. Seems wig carrier(ish) to me as well. Hmmm.