Random Stats About Du-Rags…

doo rag

Editor’s note: You folks know of him as RD and I have to call him the Youngest In Charge Of The Blogosphere. RD created a series of posts that examines the negative effects that the du-rag has upon those that wear them. RD continues with the series in the conviction that he will one day get young men to throw away their jailhouse accessories and hopefully replace them with a baseball hat that fits properly.

RANDOM STATS ABOUT DU-RAGS
1) Du-rags have become outlawed in the professional world like the ugly Black secretary(both fuck up your business, either way). Why do you think Jay-Z hides his du-rag? So says David Stern who owns a factory in Honduras that manufactures REEBOK du-rags. There is some truth to this as we have been out-sprinting the Spanish man in the race to Rikers Island prison facility. Long before the days of Diddy and J. Lo, we have been following Chico down the toilet of literacy rates, remade the salsa dance with old slave dances (thanks Lil’ Jon), and now have stolen their wife-beaters and made them into du-rags. Wife beaters were cultural memes that had become synonymous with Mexican labor – cheap and accessible. The du-rag has begun to define us. Any mystery or wonder why most du-rags are black and removable? Supremacy is sending y’all a message. And you thought the du-rag was just for some waves?!? Put a satellite radio on your head, or even go to the beach dammit.

doo rag

2) Du-rags = head thongs. I used to feel for women who had to battle the inequalities and pimps of society(no shout out to Don Juan) with a sleek, thinner diaper lodged up their temples. I mean, personally, I look at that as self-harassment. But, black males in an attempt to get ever so much closer to that temple have followed suit. Lacy, cotton, surface-area thongs now slide over their temples and are wedged between desperation and ignorance. How do you want pussy by being a pussy? I don’t get that. With this attitude you will all become duā€“rags: dispensable and black. That’s why Emimen only wears his for an hour a day. He still doesn’t want to have to wear a vest like his pet homeboy Fisty. So, next time you wear a du-rag, just think of the daily abuse on Melyssa Ford’s prism. Yeah, it still hurts to be a woman.

doo rag

3) Du-rags are more addictive than cocaine. Before one can start to exhibit Bobby Brown symptoms that powdery sample must actually enter the body. Du-rags however, are one up on coke and lie on the dome like a fresh Burger King crown, ready to crown the next royal sucker. Now does it make sense why the King of All Jigs cut a deal with BK? Shit, you don’t even have to fasten them ninja wings before you start popping suicide pills (no shout out to T.O.) or trying to hustle the African people (no shout out to Russel). I swear in a few years, your closest homie will be hustling du-rags by the pound.

doo rag

4) Du-rags are like South Korea on our globe of thought because they are straight nukin’ any intelligence (no pun). So with that y’all better get your ammo of sense ready because the war with ignorance is coming. If you can afford ignorance, you can’t afford anything else, which is to say, ignorance comes at a price. This is why supremacy will always raise the price of gas, real estate, and everything else on this blessed planet. But believe me, just like Beyonce has 2 asses, supremacy will never raise the price of the du-rag. NEVER. And once again, we lose so supremacy has to win. The score reads Supreme Team: every time a rapper forgets to wear a belt and us: -3,487,953.

We got a long way to go.

-RD

6 Responses to “Random Stats About Du-Rags…”

  1. Gee says:

    One of my coworkers asked me if I could bring her 2 do-rags back from America next time i visited…I politely told her that those things were not available in my area and was not willing to sacrifice my life to procure them for her…( actually, it was more like “Bitch, try Ebay”!)

  2. Vik says:

    these pics are classic….

    nice writing RD.

  3. ha. yes, I agree, these pics are choice.

    That will be a tough score to overcome. Though I’m not sure the scoring system, so maybe there’s hope.

  4. DT says:

    you got the baton homie…your own. good work

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