Since we have had some decent threads of late relating to the Middle East I thought I would keep the party rocking with this little treat.
I was at my favorite store in the impoverished ‘hood of Hempstead when I came across the doll action figure pictured above. Her name is Esther and she was one of the concubines to a Persian king. I forget dude’s name but we all know it wasn’t Xerxes since that dude was teh gheyer than a motherfucker. I’ll assume you saw 300.
The deal with Esther is that one of the Persian king’s generals was all pissed off with the Jews (yeah, I know, what else is new?) since the Jews wouldn’t bow down to anyone so this general drafted up a plot to kill all the Jews and the what not. Esther got wind of the plot and tried to prevent it from going down. She cooked up a crazy feast for the king and then laid up with him that night and then followed that up with another consecutive night of feasting and fisting with the B.J. combo on the side.
The king was totally sprung and told Esther that she could have whatever she likes *sings T.I. song* (not tall Israeli, but T.I.). Esther asked the king to spare the Jews and kill the general that was popping off this bullshit. The king was so smitten with Esther that he told the Jews to arm themselves and kill off their enemies, including the enemies’ wives and the children. So in this manner we can see that the situation in Gaza is simply another chapter in the longest story ever told.
What I enjoyed the most though is the fact that A.J. Wright was having a 50% off sale on all toys marked down on clearance. The Esther action figure was only $5 bucks. Yeah those three kings were wise. They knew well enough to shop during the “after Christmas” sales. My Hebrew frugality stays winning.
Purim Toys > Kwanzaa swag….
BTW – I’m convinced that the proliferation of Kwanzaa was part of the COINTELPRO agreement with Karenga and his folk.
Ouch! Ernie
Hey dallas I rapped over Love Lock Down
You can all check it out by clicking my name
Also did you hear mos def brooklyn we go hard freestyle he did at the show?
Crazy
D, you never cease to amaze. Funny stuff. Thanks. I needed that.
damn DP would make me think of this doll and this ridic story every time I hear about Esther in church for the rest of my days.
What’s ridic about the story of Esther? This shit should empower the ladies and remind them of the power of the punanny.
I have no idea where I am going when I leave this place, but I definitely know from where I came, and shit is like heaven every time I am allowed a visit.
(not the ACTUAL hole I exited from because that would be creepy, but similar joints)
lmao Dallas… sometimes you can be a hot mess. Really tho, there’s no way Esther reminds me of the power of the P. Now if you were talking about a Delilah doll, I’d be with ya.
Plus you and I both know the original story doesn’t say nothing about a “night of feasting and fisting with the B.J. combo on the side.”
The problem with the Bible is that it doesn’t go into details. What? You don’t think Esther was puttin’ in work to get the king to fux with her? You know that back then the king had to call you to his chamber. You couldn’t just run up on him even if you were his “wife”.
Listen K, I don’t want you to think that I take faith lightly, but I can tell you that there isn’t a much higher power than that which put us here. Call it GOD, call it LOVE, but don’t be afraid to make the call.
*steps off singing Al Green’s ‘Call Me’*
Waits for the Superhead Barbie to drop……………………………..
DP, I support you worshiping the va-jay-jay 100%. Peen has been on a pedestal for long enough. Viva la Vagina-lucion!!
LOL…now back to my PT nerdyness.
Oh gosh you’ve corrupted Angela now too! lol, I’m kidding…
…so I reread the story of Esther this morning. Def a lot of violence and I def see how you could assume Esther “put in work” to get Ahasuerus to kill off Haman and save the Jews, but I still don’t think it went down the way you paraphrased it (BJs and fisting popping off)
props to Esther though for being the fairest of the virgins. Turns out Ahasuerus offed his first wife for not showing her “beauty” at a feast full of princes. Now that clearly shows how the vajayjay can turn y’all negros carazay.
and oh! I’m reading this ghetto ass book my mom gave me about females controlling their “power.” Can’t remember the name right now, but its by a preacher who spends the entire book trying to come up with a PC way of saying the “piece” (thats how he describes the vajayjay) is the most powerful thing on Earth. funny stuff…so I adhere your call D and recognize my heavenliness. lol
Thanks to Esther we have Purim (where Haman got served hardbody) and with Purim comes Hamantash (named after Haman and the cap he rocked)- those triangle cookies with the dope fillings- apricot and raspberry are my favorite but the true heads stay with the prune and mun (poppy seed).
I never thought of Esther in this fashion, but with this enlightened perspective, those cookies might taste way better. Good looks DP. You should visit some Hebrew schools and PREACH!!