Meet The Browns…

browns

Did you folks know that Lakers’ guard Shannon Brown just got married to R&B singer Monica? I didn’t know about this either because they had a super secret wedding, but then they leaked the news to the press via their public relations flack that they had a super secret wedding. What gives with all these public figures having private nuptials?

I’m still not convinced that Jay-Z and BeYonce are actually married either. I mean, has either one of them admitted to being married? Or in a committed monogamous relationship for that matter? Their music still reflects the lifestyles of single people not too far removed from their 21st birthday. And we all know that Jay-Z has been going on 21 for at least the past 21 years. Popular culture personalities have such a disconnect from the reality that most of us experience.

It’s probably not even my business to know the private relationships of these public figures anyhoo, but then why do these people tease their business out to me? Who Jay-Z marries is of no consequence as long as his album with Kanye West breathes fire. And if it doesn’t I will now blame BeYonce for making Jay-Z take out the garbage or some other domestic chore. I’m not sure when our society deemed it necessary to know all this information about celebrities but it has been effect for some time now so anyone desiring a level of fame has to accept this drawback.

For some reason I just feel more extra annoyed that Monica would want a secret wedding ceremony since she hasn’t had a hit record in my ears since 1999. Lord knows she could use some positive publicity right about now. I wonder how Shannon Brown and Monica ended up together. She’s almost ten years older than him in real life and she already has two kids from that rapper dude who looks like Fabolous. I thought basketball players on winning teams could do better than washed up R&B stars.

Maybe Amar’e Stoudemire and Toni Braxton could be an item? We prA’li won’t know until they get divorced.

3 Responses to “Meet The Browns…”

  1. squalllion says:

    Toni is still looking fly, but I don’t know how that would work. Amar’e is like 2 feet taller than her. I enjoyed reading the post though. When is the Combat Jack show from last week going up?

  2. Saratoga N. Blake says:

    You cut Kanyemore slack than I do (808s >>>> latest glossy posse crap) but what possible reason is there to believe Shawn Carter and Yeezy will breathe anything but not-even-Eastern-Parkway dogshit?

    The last time Jay made even a marginally ‘honest’ record (as honest as his straight wack bullshittin’ ass can be) was “Kingdom Come” and hoodie rap clowns shit on him for it. Maybe that was correct, maybe not (I think it blows the fake sincerity out of “Black Album” straight to hell) but there you go.

    As for Kanye, that dude is so wildly inconsistent on the mic does play to his intelligent-black-everyman-made-good story but I don’t have the patience to sort shit from shinola anymore.

    Fuck all ya’ll Yankees caps too– Mets have NY, Brooklyn Dodgers B, Brooklyn Royal Giants etc.

    Also DP: I hope ** someone ** is lacing you with Prince tix, you and your readers deserve it!!– sincere.

  3. boi-dan says:

    In the words of Another Bad Creation, “Don’t be so cruel, don’t be so cruel….” “…..ayo Dallas man what up, want you do us a favor right, flip the track G…..”

    (c) Playground

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