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First off, nullus to the title of this post…

I will admit to being one of the many people that were nonplussed with the latest CD released by Jay-Z. Even with some of the bright spots contained on the disk it still seems to lack a passion for Hip-Hop that he has shown throughout his career. Funny how I find myself pining for Jigger to quote some B.I.G. lyrics. That notwithstanding, the album was still an event that Hip-Hop has never seen before. An almost forty year old man releases a cRap record that the streets (read: internets and Brooklyn) goes crazy for. If you didn’t buy it, you certainly downloaded it and you definitely got on the internets and discussed it. Prior to this record Hip-Hop music had never been marketed to consumer older than thirteen. It has become popular music and as such it occupies the space in peoples minds of permenant summer vacation, conspicuous consumpotion and no responsibility.

Think about it. When have you heard someone rap about personal responsibility when in regard to spending money. The same guy who told us that ‘Money Ain’t A Thing’ is now telling you to save your champagne money to buy a house. Too bad that most of his fan base that wasn’t wealthy to begin with have already put themselves in a position to never owning a home anyhoo. I still welcome the change though. Maybe now we’ll hear songs about checking both ways before you cross the street and not running through the house with a pair of scissors. It’s about time cRappers assumed the responsibility for moving the crowd. If being responsible means being an old head then I don’t want to be right. I’m not sure exactly what I just said, it must be one of those streams-of-conciousness rants.

Change clothes if you can you losers because Jay is back to give a swagger to all these old men that are still trying to relive their youth. This is why we are calling Jiggerman the cRap music industry’s Viagra. Just think about all the old head rappers that we can hope to hear from in the near future thanks to Jay-Z bringing sexy back to senior citizens…

	NAS Say what you want to about the baby car seat in the Bentley you are STILL gonna listen to this entire album. And I don’t even think it was a Bentley either.

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	FISTY SCENT Fisty know damn well his azz is closer to forty then he is to thirty. No matter that, he still creates the best urban safari tours on CD and you will buy it just to hear him spit shit at Gayme.

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	FAT JOE One of these years Crack is gonna make a multi-platinum record. How much you wanna bet it will have some salsa slow jams sung in spanglish?

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	JERMAINE DUPRI Quiet as its kept, J.D. is older than JANET JACKSON.

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	TOO SHORT Pimping is a lifestyle that means you do it for life. Short Dog rhymed like an old head from the start with his slow cadence and Oakland drawl.

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	ICE T Speaking of pimping, how the hell has this dude managed to remain relevant into his 50’s?

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	LL COOL J This will be the most interesting project of all the old head CD’s being released in the near future. LL was a pop music superstar twenty years ago. Can he ascend to the top again? If he does he will owe Jigger a round of Budweisers.

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ROC-A-FELLA y’all

This entry was posted on Saturday, December 2nd, 2006 at 11:32 pm and is filed under C.R.E.A.M., Crappers, Ghetto Celebs. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.