I don’t know what it is that makes me so damn happy just buying toilet paper. I get downright schoolgirl giddy. No matter how fucked up my credit might be, or how difficult my day job gets everything is forgiven in my mind with the purchase of a crispy roll of ScotTissue. This drop is in no way an endorsement for the brand especially if you are set on whatever paper you already use. All I’m saying is that there is something relaxing about not having any cash in your pocket but having a brand new roll of toilet paper.
Fuck that Marcal 69 cent roll!
I’m not placing subpar paper on my asscheeks. I’ll steal a fucking four pack of t.p. from CVS before I let some generic shit swab my cheeks when I’m inside of my house. Outside of my house, and if I have the bubbly, all bets are off, but in my castle I will only use the best. That means that when my last roll is winding down I get a little anxious. Will I have enough t.p. to get me to me my next payday? Fuck living check to check. My ass is living roll of ScotTissue to roll. Sometimes I have to start separating plys to make my shit last another day.
So you should understand my elation this weekend when I picked up two(2) four packs of extra soft ScotTissue. With all the shit I talk I am gonna need a gang of t.p.
* BONUS BEATS * BONUS BEATS * BONUS BEATS *
More massive fuckery from the t.I.’s at Abbott Labs…
What’s next? Low-carb toxic poisoning?! All-natural nuclear weapons?!?
What you need to do is hook up with someone who has a BJ’s card so you can get 32 rolls for $6.
I was going to say…nothing was better than getting the 32.
So does that announcment mean that now shorties will have big droopy breasts at an early age?
Organic my azz….they poured regular Similac in a new bottle and upped the price by $5.
Got a 32 pack of Scott’s at Sam’s Club this past weekend for about $12.00. The Lady/Man (couldn’t tell sex of cashier) even put handles on that mug for me to carry it out.
For Ultra-softness, get ya mitts (or azz) on some Ultra Northern… Best thing smokin’…
THe T.I. is still the hilarious shit.
Yo, I eff with that good Cottonelle whenever a check comes. Besides that, it’s straight Angel Soft. 4-pack status, always. I’m too fucking cheap for my own arse.
^
“I’m too fucking cheap for my own arse.”
LOL!!
It’s hard to balance quality and quantity. I mean, soft lotion quintuppple plied TP is the ish, but if you sacrifice having it around when you need it, your in a world of hurt. I wish they would just make a newage milkman style TP delivery service that hooked it up on the regulackak