I Left My Heart At Howard U. (MGMT ReMiXXXes)


Labor Day for me was always the time of year to refocus and prioritize on what it was that I wanted for myself for the rest of the year. I typically spent the summer playing the field of love, but in late August my hormones turned up the frequency so I didn’t end up with zero during the snowswept snuggle and cuddle winter months. I preferred a cutie from one of the Black colleges that occupied the mid-Atlantic states because I could always hop on the turnpike for a few hours and I still had my relative autonomy while I remained in New York City. I would have sworn to you that NYC had the greatest collection of redbone cuties until SOUNDWAVE, RANDY and I came across a pack of hotties from Howard University during the 1989 Labor Day Greekfest at Virginia Beach.

RANDY was S.W.’s cousin who lived in VA Beach. RANDY’s folks put us up for the weekend and we all spent our time on the strip bothering anything that would give us the time of day. As usual, I have to be the clown of the crew and the sassy sisters didn’t mind putting me in my place when I got too sideways. My G was always too futuristic for young girls anyhoo. I needed some college meat to test my mettle. I complimented toenail polish colors and whoever had done the best job in shaving herself. My dudes and I were having a good enough time just posting up on the boardwalk when along came this crew of cocksmashers. I call them that because they all had their walk together and proper. You know that walk that a young lady has when she is trying to tell everybody that she has been doing her ‘Kegel’ exercises? These little girls had that walk and they had the prettiest eyelashes of any crew that was on the strip that weekend. These broads had that kryptonite.

big pimpin'

The next step for the dudes and I was to get to know this crew of young sweet hotness, but how do you break into a girl group that is seven deep without getting dissed and dismissed? This is my specialty. I attack the alpha females top lieutenant with my charm. Not the alpha female, because she will have to show out for her girls to prove her leadership dominance, and not the weakest link among the ladies who is still slightly uncomfortable in her skin and may not know how to receive a compliment yet. The second in charge was a tender little brownskin sister with a battery pack bubble backside just as sweet as a piece of chocolate cake. In my mind, I am sure I made that sound where your lips smack just as you are about to enjoy something tasty.

“Hello Ms. Beautastic, you look just like my favorite cup of coffee, dark and sweet.”

Okay, I agree, but that is how you do it people — confident cornballness. The laugh of the sister and some of her friends meant that I hit my target. The next step was for me to introduce my dudes. S.W. and RANDY are both good lookin’ dudes so that wasn’t the problem in as much as there were seven ladies and only three of us. Don’t play yourself into thinking that ratio means menage status because most college girls in the ’80s and ’90s that weren’t into coke weren’t into swinging either. Don’t get me wrong, college girls were always giving up mean head and booty pie, but unless they were from Detroit you weren’t gonna be able to freak out.

big pimpin'

None of these ladies were from the ‘D’ either. They were all Cali broads that were attending Howard University. They were all freshmen and they had heard about the Greekfest on campus so they decided to drive down. 18yr olds with their own cars 3000 miles from home. I give credit to these Cali broads for being as gangster as they were. They drove to the beach on a whim and they didn’t even have a hotel room. We all hung together for the rest of the day into the evening. Later that evening when the strip was fully crowded and blown out a riot began. It was so crazy that Army helicopters and National Guardsmen cut off access to the beach. Since we were all stuck together we decided to share a hotel room. Real talk is that all 10 of us slept together on two queen size beds and no one popped off anything.

What that night allowed us was carte blanche to hang with these sisters at Howard U. anytime we wanted. S.W. and I ‘borrowed’ a Maserati from Greenich Village and went to their Homecoming weekend. The ladies brought us to a brunch spot called Julios that served chicken, waffles and mimosas for only $7 bucks a person. Those Howard U. chicks knew how to have a good time too. Almost twenty years later I am still friends with them. Even the ones that I’m not friends with anymore.

Too bad youth is wasted on the young.

12 Responses to “I Left My Heart At Howard U. (MGMT ReMiXXXes)”

  1. khype says:

    Always wanted to have stories like this to tell…I wish I was of college age during the late 80’s… when “we” knew how to have fun…thanx for the memories.

  2. P-Matik says:

    The ’89 Greekfest was the year of the riots right? Man, VA Bitch has been a police state ever since that shit. Racist mofos.

  3. Big Homie says:

    In the DC area and Howard U always got the finest females. DC in general actually. Do not sleep.

    >>The second in charge was a tender little brownskin sister with a battery pack bubble backside just as sweet as a piece of chocolate cake.

    Classic. That line right there is classic..lol

  4. Eloheem Star says:

    Good story D, I must of misssed that one.
    I used to “Borrow” vehicles too but nothing in the Maserati League. That’s the best part of going to the Home commings, Greekfest, Freakniks & Black college weekend type events. A bunch of kids from all over most with no money, no hotel and no plan but everything always worked out.

  5. Candice says:

    Yes…college. Those were the days.

    You know, all of those ladies are in bathing suits and they still look classy.
    Something these youngsters need to learn to master. They walk around fully clothed and look like five miles of bad road. LOL

  6. Tiffany says:

    This is one of my faves Dallas…

  7. Combat Jack says:

    Co-sign Candice. I remember mad VA Beach, Philly Greek Fests, Penn Relays and Jones Beach jump-offs where the main objective was to conquer the skins. However, in all of my past adventures, I do not remember ANY event where the appearance of the good girls and the nappy headed hos was indistinguishable. (Funny shit is that the good girl looking chicks were the ones that was down for WHATEVER and the chicks that were a bit more on the hoorish looking side were mad conservative). These days, a nigga caint tell the difference. Things started changing drastically when I used the attend the Jack The Rapper conferences and chicks started showing their thong lines. Shit dun changed!

  8. the_dallas says:

    ^ Jack The Rapper Conference was a Freaknik outgrowth.

    C.S. and I were in South Beach this weekend for her birthday and there was also some jig nonsense jumping off – SpringFest?!? Regardless to say C.S. got a little vexed with me for looking to hard at the thong strings. I hate to sound old but these chick have their asses out the bag crazily. Dayum!

    What? Oh. Coming darling…

  9. This is the exact reason I am a fan of Dallaspenn.com, good story homie…….I am working on my own stories even though in this day and age its not the same but you can still have a reasonable amount of fun. Yo Dallas I am going to go see NaS on Wednesday first time ever should be cool. I am taking this Argentianian(sp) broad I am seeing(I will forward you a pick). Being the Nas stan that I am there is no way I can be disappointed. Ghostface is here tonight but I am not able to make it but I have heard his live performance leaves much to be desired. Out of Lf:

    Yo Dallas have you seen those Old School Oakley Frogskins damn they are dope but when I went on Ebay I was looking at around 200 for a pair, So I passed on them. I might end up buying them anyway because my self control when I really like something is pretty weak, nhoc. 1………

  10. Eloheem Star says:

    @ I fux
    Argentinian Hotness you say. If she’s from the north I bet she looks along the line of the daughter from the Sapranos…Meadow.
    Ghostface show = Nas show. If you ever get a chance go see The Roots live you won’t be dissapointed.

  11. nerditry says:

    @star: the roots are a badass live show and take a ton of pride even if they’re the openers. saw them in tampa opening for 311 and was mesmerized by hub and captain kirk on guitar. you get lost in what they’re playing because every song has a great chance of becoming a jam session.

    @dallas: lol, a reason to peep thong in south beach? man, it’s hardcore with the ladies just walking down alton ave. and that’s a few blocks in from the water. you want to game miami, lemme know next time you head south.

    and finally @candace: i’m 26 and feeling that about the girls I see in my college area of Orlando. it’s easy to look slutty or hot these days, but damn if no girls my age have a clue about sexy. it’s a gold rush for premature ho bagging.

  12. MrNoGood says:

    I remember a couple of those girls because they graduated the same year I did…I used to love that slanty eyed lightskinned girl but I didn’t really know her personally.

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