GOOGLE Buys DALLASPENN.COM Feces for $300 Million

talking shit

Now that I’ve quit blogging I decided to sell the website to internets behemoth Google. It was the only logical choice since none of you effs give a damn anyhoo. With the money I can reimburse my investors like ZILLZ, LM, RAFI and AMADEO. And then with the leftover change I am copping a pint of Ben & Jerry’s low-fat Cherry Garcia for CHOCOLATE SNOWFLAKE. At least she watches ‘Squidbillies’ with me, and we are also getting into this new NBC show called ‘Heroes’.

Back in June we discussed why Google was the premium model for neo-meta-traditional American consumerism. Combining their deep pockets and the vast informational resources of the DALLASPENN dot com archive I expect nothing less from Google than world domination. Just to expedite the Illuminati along we decided to download the entire site onto a microchip and embed it within the poop.

“Soylent Green is people.”

dp=dirty poo
dp=dirty poo

11 Responses to “GOOGLE Buys DALLASPENN.COM Feces for $300 Million”

  1. Sheeit says:

    Get that paper brotherr… Bury the chip in shit, google got dookie dallas files to inject the masses with knowledge and style- give it to em raw and they take it with a smile.

  2. dronkmunk says:

    think google will want to buy my site too?

    dronkmunk.blogspot.com

  3. Bumpy says:

    Well, there’ll be no shortage of disaffected brothers with computers anytime soon. Enjoy your Mamma’s basement tubby.

  4. RD says:

    Dallas, we’re all waiting for you return…come back brother

  5. How are you supporting NBC’s weak ass heroes when you ragged on Superman?

    Superman had flaws but Heroes is trashbags.

    15 million viewers can be wrong.

  6. Alex2.0 says:

    dang dp, with barack talking about running for prez…and people burying the “n-word” it kinda sucks that you are on a break. but i still hope all is well with ya and hope you enjoy the time off. just dont get too comfortable away from us.

  7. 911 says:

    *Lysol screen* Nasty mofo…….u aint going no where.

  8. Lion XL says:

    I wasnt responding to this cuz……I have no effin clue whats goin on! Its not april so its its not an aprils fool joke, so WTF? Elaborate someone please!!!

    PS If it is true that your leavin, Best of Luck.

    PPS I blame this on Jigga /Diddy and all their bullshit…
    and we have yet another casualty in the war on Hip Hop…..

  9. miss ahmad says:

    the fecal matter concerns me more than the thought of losing you…am i wrong for that?

  10. Supa says:

    What the fuh…??

Leave a Reply for Lion XL