Time To Snatch A Du-Rag: JAY-Z

jayonce

Editor’s note: The youngest in charge of the blogosphere is 15 year old? wunderkind RODNEY DUGUE. Don’t even ask me where this prodigy has learned so many of life’s lessons without being old enough to buy beer – legally. His initial offering to this site was the visionary theme that du-rags appear to restrict the flow of blood into the brain of the wearers. For DP dot com’s guest blogger week, RD comes back with a follow up that takes some of the air out of the Jiggerman hype machine. Do you know what time it is???

TIME TO SNATCH A DU-RAG: JAY-Z
It was reported that while Jay was fishing for one of Beyonce’s weaves, he discovered his long, lost limited edition Reebok du-rag. I will bet you 50’s du-rag collection and Mark Foley’s kiddy porn empire that Lebron gave him that du-rag right after he finished high school. How do I know? The last time Lebron committed anything more than a personal foul was that time he accepted those mysterious throwback jerseys. Homeboy has been clean like the kicks he gets paid to wear.

But, back to Jay-beer, WTF dude. Seriously, you had us ROC’ing with you, fella. Breaking bread with African kings, dishing out water to the needy, damn negro, I was actually believing the ‘S’ stood for Saint, as in Saint Carter. Mother Theresa was having a party in the heavens. But, then shit started going down, literally. You were living in Danica Patrick’s temple for that whole video shoot and probably contracted that rare STD, general cranium negro-philis. For those of you who haven’t caught on yet, general cranium negro-philis is the direct effect of wearing a du-rag. Jay was exhibiting hyper-symptoms. He had his du-rag tied extra tight when he accepted the position of brand consultant of Anheuser. I know we both look alike, (we’re both black) but damn Jay no matter how you flip it, we ain’t those alien boots known to man as S dot Carters.

Stop trying to sell us out. You’re becoming more and more like that du-rag – dispensable and cheap. You selling us water in one hand and death in the other. NOW, let me understand this, you drop Cristal, but then allegedly partner up with another high-end champagne Arnolds dick-Yuck Armand de Brignac. Negro, you ever drink apple juice? What, you piss out Bacardi? You might as well go back to them hustling days because right now you hustling the Black community like that new black-market drug and the white man is your best customer.

Change clothes Jay, and while you’re at it throw out the du-rag

RD

13 Responses to “Time To Snatch A Du-Rag: JAY-Z”

  1. miss ahmad Says:

    okay that was fresh….

    only the real outlaw muslims seem to take offense to the amount of liquor being peddled into our communites!

    Cheers to you dude!

  2. LM Says:

    Tightest writing ever by RD, congrats

  3. Candice Says:

    RD….this was real. Good job youngster.

  4. Gerard Says:

    Good Job on this one Rodney! Keep deliverin that fire. But Rodney is actually 17yrs old…

  5. 40 Dawg aka "Betty Ford Dropout" Says:

    “You might as well go back to them hustling days because right now you hustling the Black community like that new black-market drug and the white man is your best customer.”

    Interesting… Very interesting…

  6. Tiffany Says:

    Good post RD.

  7. Vee Says:

    As I expected, the whole Water for Life is a promotional gimick. Is Jay really trying to do something special other than perform and smile for photo ops? I don’t know because I’m not there, but it’s all suspect.

    Well I already heard about reports concerning over-priced concert tickets and then I came across this link from another blog:

    http://realtalkny.blogspot.com/

    Some brother from Ghana getting at Jay.
    http://www.ghanaweb.com/GhanaHomePage/entertainment/artikel.php?ID=112686&comment=2357427#com

    Other than that, I now have a new name for homey, Corporate Carter.

  8. DELINQ Says:

    Nice work RD- not only this post but the “du-rag” series might be on to something- the Daily News has linked du-rags to the Chicken Noodle Soup shooting…
    “When (the victim) walked outside, a fight had started over the theft of a do-rag, police said.”

    http://www.nydailynews.com/front/story/466916p-392800c.html (via Nah Right)

  9. Sangano Says:

    dam u people ryde a good dyyk..its aight

  10. Amadeo Says:

    Jay is launcing into another hemisphere.

  11. RD Says:

    Yea, im happy we all can see that even “God” himself is subject to ignorance lol. And Vee, I would not at all be surpised at that news.

  12. esbee Says:

    Good critique and I agree with him on most points considered.

  13. I ain't lyin' Says:

    You selling us water in one hand and death in the other.
    ==============
    Isn’t this the nature of Hip hop and OF Humanity though.

    Plump em up, kill’em and eat.

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