2006 World Series: Who The Fuck Cares?!?

mac

My grandfather once said that only two things come from St. Louis – beers and queers. So while the Cardinals and the Tigers were playing a friendly game of baseball, news emerged that St. Louis had already edged out Detroit in another popular contest.

St. Louis leads U.S. in violent crimes committed in 2005..

This is some kind of acheivement if you think about and do the numbers. As far as aggregate population numbers are concerned St. Louis doesn’t occupy any of the top 10 positions in the United States. St. Louis isn’t even among the top 10 cities with a Black population. So in order for them to secure the high water mark for 2005 there had to be some people putting in hell’a work.

It all starts from the top of the local government with the mayor of St. Louis’ name being FRANCIS SLAY. How could this city not be a winner? Instead of having a parade for the Cardinals baseball club, Missourians should be celebrating their comeupance as the most gully municipality for the previous calendar year. Let’s give a salute to some of the people that have helped the ‘Show Me State’ show us the way to the return to violent crimes…

mac

MARK McGWIRE
(former JOSE CANSECO syringe holder)
Controlled Substances Award

Respect this man for getting his anabolic steroid on and turning himself into a national hero.

dookie ALI
(NELSON’s weed carrier)
Driving While Black Award

The only funny part of this story is the rumor that ALI was tasered so much by the police that he committed an involuntary bowel movement in his Apple Bottoms.

chingles CHINGALINGY
(CLIVE DAVIS’ wig brusher/sack holder/yes VANDROSS)
Sexual Assault Award

Any old rapper can get busted for smoking weed and gun possession. Groping transexuals at an adult film awards show was this dude’s gateway to rap music fame.

bol BYRON CRAWFORD
(ELLIOT WILSON’s fade cream supplier)
Killing An Artist’s Dreams Award

I think I had actually considered purchasing the LUPE FIASCO ‘Food and Liquor’ CD until B.C. exposed the hypocrisy of his character and the duplicitous nature of LUPE’s lyrics.

14 Responses to “2006 World Series: Who The Fuck Cares?!?”

  1. Candice Says:

    Damn…Byron is gangsta!

  2. Nigeria Says:

    Is that really Bol.

  3. ELOHEEM STAR Says:

    That Byron Crawford piece is hardcore.

    I cant be mad at the barbecue sauce state, the Cardinals win increased my financial portfolio by $100.00

    Besides Miles Davis is from St. Louis

  4. Amadeo Says:

    Oh Baseball did have something…I wouldn’t know. Baltimore = no baseball.

    Chingy always sounded wrong to me…like it’s an inside joke on him.

  5. Vik Says:

    great post.

    bol really is black!

  6. fresh Says:

    So UGK now knows what city Byron lives in and what he looks like. We may all soon be wearing Free Pimp C shirts again.

  7. 911 Says:

    Cleveland is seventh and were surrond by the top 10…..sad isn’t it……lol @ the bol pic.

  8. asddf Says:

    That isnt Bol ya dumbfucks.

  9. RJ Says:

    # fresh Says:
    October 30th, 2006 at 7:42 pm

    So UGK now knows what city Byron lives in and what he looks like. We may all soon be wearing Free Pimp C shirts again.

    ^^ LOL!! I cosign that.

  10. STL Says:

    Dallaspenn is a fucking deuche bag!!! You can’t handle St. Louis bitch!

  11. Billy Sunday Says:

    STL stays losing if it took you a year to find this drop. And thats a true story.

  12. John Davis Says:

    The only reason St Louis led the nation in violent crimes is because of East St Louis. Which if you are so stupid or ignorant (possibly both) is in Illinois. If you put a city like East St Louis next to another city, say, Chicago? They would lead the nation in violent crimes too. And if you go to east side and you’re white, you better hope to god you’re packing. That is why St Louis led the country in violent crimes, not because it’s a shitty city, but because we have the worst right next to us.
    Oh, and I cordially invite you to spend a week in East St Louis.

  13. shabooty Says:

    is that bol or not? illumanti is asking.

  14. Byron Crawford Says:

    I know all black people lok alike, but there is a Byron Crawford the hip hop blogger, and Byron Crawford the renewable energy developer. I think you might have pulled the image of the latter….and I think that because he is me.

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