Wig Owners: Sue Simmons’ Wig Brushers…


SUE SIMMONS is the GOAT news anchorwoman. She has outlasted the KATIE COURICs and the KAITY TONGs. Name another newscaster that can let fly the expletives and still maintain their primetime position as a talking head? Even male anchormen can’t get away with that shit.

The advantage that has kept SUE SIMMONS on top is her wig crypt. In nearly thirty years I have never seen her lace front get turned sideways. Thanks to Bossip.com for these iconic images.


Native New Yorker Sue Simmons takes charge at Rockefeller Center from day one. Damn baby, who brushes your wigs?!?


The late 80’s saw Simmons representing Prince in her purple splendor.


The 1990’s were rough for Sue. She always kept a crispy Huck Finn wig though. Just in case she might have to cut a motherfucker.


Can’t tell her nothing. SIMMONS in the 2000’s

Now a whole new crop of grey-green eyed beauties is vying for the position of lightskint info queen. These broads all have the right complexion that America trusts, but do they have their wig weight on full?

Soledad kills shit on CNN. With Afro-Cuban and Irish all mixed together its a small wonder she hasn’t been caught cussing on camera.

I love me some grey-green eyes and I love a chick with a hard to pronounce last name. I wouldn’t mind spending springtime in Paris with Malveaux although another Suzanne would kick my arse.

The self-described queen of all media has stepped up her lacefront game with her morning show on Fox. Someone needs to help her with her brushing technique though if she wants her wigs to last.

alison stewart ALISON STEWART
Microsoft has a monopoly on their computer operating system. Let’s just hope that they don’t start monopolizing all the pretty lightskints with the Boneturals.

Frederica is another CNN dimepiece. She is the weekend action. Basically a side order to your O’Brien entree.

To keep these proceedings “fair and balanced” we are including right wing strategist Amy Holmes. Don’t think for a minute that her kiss on a fellow correspondents cheek is anything less than the kiss of death for Black males. Holmes only dates the white.


Tyra’s wig game has been on an incline but does she have the camera presence to be a face that you want to see every day? C Webb didn’t think so.

The figurative dark horse of this lightskint bunch of lovelies is my homegirl Tanisha Mallette. During my wild and crazy high school years Ms. Mallette had a crush on yours truly. When I recently saw Ms. Mallette in NYC she looked at me up and down and burst out laughing. Her remarks were, “and I had a crush on YOU!”

This drop was shamelessly swaggerjacked from the Underwriter

13 Responses to “Wig Owners: Sue Simmons’ Wig Brushers…”

  1. Marvelous Mo says:

    lmao…im really mad at you and UnderWriter for this.

    It’s over for the lightskints. I’m supporting the “Dark Butts”

    Well, except for Wendy. People hate her, but I like what she brings to the table. Although her face can be rotund at times [see pic above], there are times I don’t taste my throw up because her face looks like a human.
    *these pics:
    http://i16.tinypic.com/3zhjfa1.jpg http://www.urbancollectives.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/wendywilliams_1.jpg

    But yeah, Wendy + Dark Butts.

  2. i fucks with campbell brown from CNN hardbody…

    is it me, or does tanisha mallett kinda look like salt from salt-n-pepa?

  3. Sue Simmons kept it so G with that F bomb on the air. I totally forgot about putting her down on the list, but then again, I’m not in NY.

    Good looks.

  4. Enigmatik says:

    She always kept a crispy Huck Finn wig


  5. henry says:

    never heard of most of these except for the one that was on black america, i thought she was all white

  6. 911 says:

    Thanks for the laughs dp. Peace bro.

  7. Amadeo says:

    I’d give to Stewart for history sake.

    Holmes just needs some good loving from a brother.

    Tyra looks crazy in that pic…so it’s an average joint.

  8. I noticed on the CNN/MSNBC Democratic primary coverage, all the women had to be either be generic young beauties like Amy Holmes, with the exception of a few “big politics names” like Donna Brazille or Geraldine Ferraro. I like the dimes, but OTOH these shows unfair, since there are scores of generic unknown men douches on those shows like Tucker Carlson & Tweety Chris Matthews.

    The generic unknown non-dime women “commentators” are being discriminated against.

  9. Vee says:

    Alison Stewart, I remember when she worked on MTV. She’s fine but she’s married.

    ^Gringo . . . “generic unknown non-dime women” will usually face discrimination. It’s just the way the game is played.

  10. Combat Jack says:

    Not to go all name droppy, but I’m actually cool with Soledad O’Brien, who I see on a daily basis as her kids and my kids go to the same school. Never actually peeped her “Blackness”, even up close and personal, but she still remains really cool people. Was disappointed that she didn’t “go in” at all on that BS CNN Crack In America special, but then, what was I expecting. Good post my dude.

  11. UBRINGMEJOI says:

    wendy williams needs help with her joint, i would think that to be on the radio she is cool but a t.v show- wow! i would think that a stylist would be on set to help her out but um yeah i guess not, lol!

    everyone else’s is on point…. if you gotta rock a wig getta lace front!

    “Have you had your dose of ‘Joi’ today?”


  12. You have brought up a very great points , regards for the post.

  13. Erasmo says:

    Fantastic stuff. Thanks a lot.

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