Archive for the ‘Sports are Gay’ Category

And We’re Back!!!

Thursday, August 14th, 2014

IF

My poor lil’ weblog is in dire need of an upgrade which I’ll have to administer in the immediate present, but the NFL Pick ‘Em Pool is back again for the true believers.

Leave your e-mail address in the comments section so I can send you an invite.

CHEA!

Champagne Aspirations, Malt Liquor Reality…

Thursday, June 12th, 2014

champ1

I’m secretly dying a million deaths inside my mind right now. I desperately wanted the Air Jordan retro Championship pack and the release date is this weekend but all my BRed (you see it) is tied up in my wedding planning. Boo hoo. I can’t get down with the hype.

The Champagne and Cigar 6s looks to be one of the most legendary releases for the Jordan Brand in quite some time. Both pairs are premium leather with all kinds of details throughout the shoes. I’m most hyped for the gold aglets (lace tips) and the championship ring as a lacelock.

champ2

champ3

champ4

If there is a sneaker god up in the sky I hope he watches my YouTubes and fux with the kid hardbody

KEVIN DURANT IS THE NEW KING…

Wednesday, May 21st, 2014

I stayed up ’til 5am watching the encore presentation of the Oklahoma City Thunder visiting the Knicks at Madison Square Garden. The atmosphere in the Garden was electric. Tracy McGrady was making his Garden debut along with Eddie House. Kevin Durant was in town with the Thunder. I should have gone to the Garden and scalped a ticket for this tilt. It ended up being one of this season’s classic contests.

The Knicks battled well with the Thunder all game long. They even had a lead at several points throughout the game including the final seconds of regulation play. That is when Kevin Durant sent the Garden faithful back into their seats for an overtime period. The Thunder needed a three point play to tie the game and put an overtime period into the books. Durant hit the contested shot straight and true. When I tell you he is the best player in the league right now I am not bullshitting you. Kevin Durant is the new King. BERNARD KING.

Bernard King is my favorite Knick of all time alongside Patrick Ewing. There was not a shot in the Garden that Bernard wouldn’t take, AND make. He was a forward with quickness and body control and a killer instinct. Bernard King used to wear Larry Bird’s ass out [ll] on the regular. Bernard used to wear everyone in the league’s ass out [ll] for that matter. Standing at 6-9 you could not guard him with a taller player. I remember watching Ralph Sampson attempt to guard Bernard and dude was looking like a mannequin as ‘Nard moved around him like a slalom gate. If you were shorter than Bernard he would just shoot over the top of your head like it wasn’t no thing.

the king

The only thing that did stop Bernard was his body. He tore his ACL and missed playing with Ewing during his rookie campaign. If Bernard had been healthy the Knicks with him and Ewing would have made New York jump like Rod Strickland. When I watched Kevin Durant play last night it was like watching the second coming of Bernard King. Durant can get his shot off anywhere on the floor. He can put the ball down on the floor and penetrate to the rim[ll]. Mainly, he can finish plays with a score. I’m calling him the MVP this season. Fux a LeBron.

The advantage that Durant has over my Brooklyn hero King is that Durant plays better defense on the ball. Last night Durant was matched up at times against Tracy McGrady (who found the bottom of the net quite often as well), but mostly against Wilson Chandler who was terribly overmatched by the league’s most dynamic player. Just wait until Durant starts going on those 40point streaks. Bernard would have a week or two of those. Just torching whichever teams came to MSG. I’m rooting for Kevin Durant to have as much success and more for his career. Word to Walt Whitman Houses and the King brothers from Fort Greene.

the king

The CHUCKSTER…

Tuesday, May 20th, 2014

chuckster

Happy Birthday Charles Barkley!

Back in the days in a time before lockouts. Long before every high school junior had to sign paperwork that declared he would be returning to complete his high school diploma and not opting out for the NBA draft. Well before the All Star game was synonymous with the police blotter. Way before 7pts per game, 7 boards and 7 turnovers could still earn you 7 figures. There was the CHUCKster.

For every bald-headed, over-priced-sneaker-wearin’, baggy-short-sportin’, number 23 wanna-be, there was the anti-JORDAN. Slightly rotund (read: fat), vertically challenged ballers had found their hero. He wore #34 for the Philadelphia Seventy-Sixers. He was more real than anyone swimming in DAVID STERN’s primetime fishbowl. CHARLES BARKLEY represented more of the American ideal than any politician since JOHN F. KENNEDY.

He had a smile that could outshine MAGIC’s. A work ethic that would exhaust LARRY BIRD. I will even place one of BARKLEY’s trademark ‘coast-to-coast, snatch rebouund from taller power forward or center, break out into dribble with behind the back crossover into explosive two hand flush with hang on rim swing’ over anything from the Jumpman. Well… almost anything, except for the baseline headfake on STARKS and OAK to the super rise flush on EWING’s flattop followed by the “nigga please” stareback. Even JORDAN fans had to admit that the CHUCKster represented that night in Detroit when he and LAIMBEER got down for the crown and went toe to toe.

My favorite season for SIR CHARLES was not that year when he first came to Phoenix. That’s when everybody else discovered how special his game was and he won the league MVP. I remember a few years prior in Philly, it was the 91-92 season. BARK was always one of the top five in scoring, rebounding and field goal percentage and this season there was a semblance of a cast to hold him down. At the point was MAURICE ‘MO’ CHEEKS, a cagey veteran. JOHNNY DAWKINS at the two. The frontcourt was filled, and I mean filled by BARK and former Piston RICK MAHORN.

BARK said that he was happy when Philly signed RICK from DETROIT because now he didn’t have the fattest ass in the lockerroom. At center was the inhuman shot blocker, 7′-6″ MANUTE BOL. BOL actually hit four treys in one game because BARK was telling him to shoot it. The sixth man of this fun team was the pre-VERNON MAXWELLIAN character SEDALE THREATT. SEDALE was just like JORDAN, but without the ‘J’. These misfits rumbled into the Eastern Conference semis and found themselves up against a Chicago Bulls team in the middle of their first dynasty.

It didn’t matter to me so much what the final outcome was (read: swept). BARKLEY’s presence in the postseason was all of the validity that I needed to appreciate my own special game. If CHARLES never gets his elusive title he should still receive some kind of plaque for letting all the ballers in double-extra-large drawls believe they can fly.

All-Star Sneaker Swag…

Sunday, February 16th, 2014

NBA-All-Star-Game-2014

You know I’m a beast for the hype and I got hyped for the Air Jordan XX8 being released for the NBA All-Star game going down in New Orleans. The Air Jordan XX8 is the lightest shoe ever in the flagship line’s storied history. It’s also one of the cheapest top performance shoes on the market.

I’m so impressed with the Jordan XX8 I’m going to copp the style exclusively for the rest of the year. And I really mean that.