Archive for the ‘T.O.N.Y.’ Category

The Greatest MySpace Rapper Alive…

Thursday, April 9th, 2009

tlk

Now before some of you Def Jam employees get your shit all fucked the fuck up and take my name off your list for Def Jam sponsored open bar parties let me explain why Jadakiss is the greatest MySpace rapper alive.

1) NaS isn’t on MySpace
2) Jay-Z isn’t on MySpace

Bong! Next in line is arguably Jada. I don’t feel like having a silly debate with any of you this afternoon. Just hear me out and if you disagree keep it to yourself. Tell you what, let’s make all things equal and for those that may agree with me y’all can keep it to yourselves as well. No one is going to be able to dissuade me of my opinion after I saw Jadakiss perform at NYC’s Highline Ballroom last night.

The last time I saw Jadakiss live was at a B.I.G. tribute at a long lost NYC nightspot called the Palladium. Easily 8-9 years ago. Maybe I caught the Lox at some more recent shit, but I can’t really remember anymore. That is clearly the effects from smoking too many Dutch Masters cigars. Don’t do drugs party people. Give them to me. Anyhoo, it has been a grip since I can remember watching Jadakiss rock a show.

I have been missing out. First off, The Lox and Jada have a mighty healthy catalog. They have features, they have singles and they have hits. Hardbody hits. It’s almost like going into a time capsule and bringing along some of the best underground rap music you ever listened to. Jadakiss is also a solid performer [ll] as well. He doesn’t leave any tracks on long enough to get boring. He flips through his catalog like we might flip through a photo album lingering on a long ago pic until we laugh out loud and then keeping it moving.

Even though I called Jadakiss a rapper I have to give him the credit for gripping the microphone like an emcee last night. He brought out friends to accompany him through songs and then quickly dismissed them so that he could continue blistering through his catalog. He did let Busta Rhymes loiter a bit longer than everyone else but that was so that Busta could anoint Jadakiss the new king of New York. If I were Jada I would have told Busta to keep the crown. Kings lose those shits, but teachers, them motherfuckers stay intelligentsia, ya’ deeg?

The Last Kiss, Jadakiss’ latest CD is prA’li gonna be like the previous two. There will be four(4) incredible songs that Jada will add to his concert playlist but we won’t be kneeling down before him for this album. That is another reason why I say Jadakiss is the greatest MySpace rapper. Have you ever known a MySpace rapper to post more than four(4) songs at a time? They usually be horrible joints too, but y’all already know that. Jadakiss has four(4) hits on this new CD and the rest are for his true fans.

MySpace was one of the sponsors for last night’s event. If this is the new promotional tool for Universal Records, or at least the new farm (no Asher Roth Mennonite relatives) for talent then I want to give Universal Music Group and the folks at MySpace some free advice from Dallas Penn (the defacto teacher of these internets).

Post new music from Jadakiss, Asher Roth, Rick Ro$$ and all of your artists on their MySpace pages. When MS users tranfer these songs to the playlists on their own pages find out where these users live using their zip codes. Use that information to geographically market your artists performances. Great performances should translate into CD sales and other streams of revenue for your corporation, er, your artists. You know who the fuck I am talking about?!?

Listen, I shouldn’t pretend to know shit about shirley since my highest level of scholastic achievement is a general equivalency diploma, but the truth is that I do know shit about the internets and I doubt that most of you have even read this drop to this point. We are living in a post-literate society now. It’s not that people can’t read they just don’t want to read. They would rather get their information from the tubes – boob tubes, intertubes, YouTubes, etc.

Rainy Daze Make Life Grow Up…

Wednesday, April 8th, 2009

mighty healthy dp
mighty healthy dp
mighty healthy dp
mighty healthy dp
mighty healthy dp

The rain hadn’t stopped coming down since the previous night.

The rain puts me in a shitty mood.

Plus I just have all kinds of issues with adulthood.

I did not feel like being friendly with anyone and part of my job requires me to be cordial at least to my clients. I wasn’t feeling them. Usually I can adjust my sullen attitude with a little retail therapy but the the Air Yeezys were sold out everywhere.

I felt like playing in traffic.

When I left the office it was already dark outside.

The asphalt disguises the depth of the puddles and I stepped in several that wet my ankles.

I was on my way to the liquor store when I got a text message from my G. He asked me how I was doing, but I think he already knew. Me and sonn share the same new year’s date. He told me to stop by the studio and share some dinner with him.

I’m glad I didn’t decline his invite.

JOELL ORTIZ was in the studio recording.

His latest song is now my rainy daze anthem.

I needed to hear some shit like this which is light years away from the nihilistic and narcissistic rap music that dominates the genre. This is the type of song that helps you put on your emotional armor. When I left the studio it felt like the rain had stopped.


JOELL ORTIZ – ‘Stand Up!’ (produced by Novel)

And The Legend Grows…

Tuesday, April 7th, 2009

knuckles

Knuckles goes in [ll]! – pix courtesy of 215 magazine

I talk a lot of shit on this website about how crazy my life gets because it really does get that bananas. One of my longtime DP.commenters was in NYC and decided to take me up on my challenge. SIMON is from Amsterdam, Holland so he knows a thing or two about partying, but he has never hit the streets with DP2FTV. This is the realest reality show evar.

Our first stop was the Patron mixer at the Penthouse Lounge. Free Patron. Free food. And a gaggle of ladies in hooker heels and dresses with no drawls on. This is Monday night in NYC. Which is the new Friday if you ask me.

After at least a ten rounds apiece SIMON and I motivated to the Roots crew jam session at the Highline Ballroom. I’m tired of telling you to go to the Highline Ballroom to catch an evening of the Roots residency there. You could set yourself up for one of the best nights you ever had. Highline’s kitchen remains open during the show and the bartenders are typically heavyhanded.

The Roots have been doing their thing for so long it is almost easy to take them for granted. I try not to because I imagine that the day I sleep on these dudes they will fly off a spaceship that will be too legendary. This session featured my homey JOELL ORTIZ. He was the first rapper to get on the stage and pay homage to the Roots crew. I thought that was a great look by him. Hip-Hop was definitely in the building.

I talk about Black Thought so much that I am embarrassed I haven’t mentioned the skills of Truck North and Dice Raw. I watched Dice Raw hold the microphone with a confidence that comes from being a true veteran emcee. Dice Raw reminded me of the days when the Legendary would come to NYC and tear down classic venues like the Wetlands and Tramps.

I can’t wait for the Roots picnic in Philadelphia. DP x Philly stand up!

CAM’RON ALBUM RELEASE PARTY 05.04.09

Monday, April 6th, 2009

dipset

Back in the day when ‘Diplomatic Immunity’ was about to drop I was definitely a DipSet stan. Those were still the fun carefree days of Hip-Hop journalism. Even though it was post-911 the rap dollars were still circulating. At this moment I can’t even tell you if and when I will get another check for writing about rap music.

I will still keep partying though since that is what I have done fro the jump. Cam’Ron will be having the release party for his upcoming CD ‘Crime Pays’ at the Highline Ballroom. It will be hosted by NYC radio station Hot97’s own Funkmaster Flex so I expect it to be a star-studded event with plenty of ‘hood celebs to go around.

Is there still an outside chance that a DipSet re-union could take place?

You will just have to show up and see.

dipset

Antenna x Complex = Mighty Healthy…

Sunday, April 5th, 2009

mighty healthy dp

It hasn’t stopped for me in over twenty years. Yeah, I’m starting to show some rust, but I’m still hanging out there with some of the all-time greats and the young, up and coming players.

I was originally slated to be at a staff meeting for this internet radio station. The only problem with that maneuver is that they never took me seriously enough to put a real deal in front of me. The kid needs new sneakers once a month and I still gotta keep the lights on and the roof over my head. Maybe another offer will come to my inbox. But in the meantime and in between time I will be getting it in.

My first stop was to scope out this joint being thrown by VitaminWater. The main reason was for me to get like a palette of free VitaminWater for the crib. That shit tastes like diluted Kool-Aid but I don’t care when its free. The VitaminWater joint was on some exclusy, velvet rope type shit. These be some of the corniest parties in NYC. Too many stargazers trying to eyefuck actual celebrities. No RSVP status for the internets celebrities. I kept it moving.

The next spot was the Antenna x Mighty Healthy party. Folks was getting it in early at this spot. By the time I got there people were already into their second round of drinks. That’s never a problem for me though since I automatically double fist [ll]. The obama was an off-brand name vodka which made a decent Cranberry mix, but an even tastier screwdriver. That would be my drink for the rest of the night. My Twitter frenemy ERICKA MITTS was up in that piece along with XXL’s CARL CHERY. My surprise internets homey for the night was this dude Sublicon who won the DP.com NFL football pool this past year.

mighty healthy dp

The Antenna mag party was cool as shit but everyone there at that moment knew that the real popoff was the Complex magazine joint on Spring Street. Let’s just say it was understood that if you wanted to be a winner that evening you had to have your face up in there. You all know that DP is a winner and one of the most triumphant boozehounds of our generation. I had a couple more rounds of free vodka on Antenna’s dime before I swooped down to Spring Street where the Complex party was at.

Oh shit! The line outside of the Complex party was brawlick. Madd fools was standing around in that silent pose hoping to get chose by the chicks holding the clipboards. I walked up to the front of the ropes. This is the quick way to play yourself out of position. If you get shut down by the gatekeepers it happens in full view of all the other folks trying to get in. Good for me that I have friends with pull. Complex mag’s JOE LA PUMA zooped me in the spot with no delay. It was on like popcorn.

ONSmash’s Hoffa, LowkeyUHTN, Consequence, 88Keys, Mighty Casey, Che Guerilla, Hobbs, the Rosenthal brothers plus madd P.R. firm chicks and free Svedka vodka. It was disgusting. Drinks were being spilled, people were dancing on the couches and the best part was when KanYe’s ‘Flashing Lights’ blared from the speakers JOE LA PUMA held his Air Yeezy’s high in the sky. Complex parties are typically splashy anyhoo, this joint was particularly bananas. I can’t say why but it was just wildly energetic and festive.

mighty healthy dp

Shouts to Mighty Casey and JASON ‘Che Guerilla’ NEGRON for knowing the key to hanging out is not being the last ones left in the party. After an hour or two we boogied out of the Complex joint and motivated back up to the Mighty healthy party for their 2nd Half. The bar was reopened at 12mid and the free vodka was still in effect. The second half of the Mighty Healthy shindig went up into outerspace like the Complex party was.

JUJU from the Beatnuts was getting literally lowdown for his. Sonn was dipped in ‘Lo from his head down to his toes. MICHAEL RAPPAPORT even made a cameo. My PU~ of the evening was in not politicking with RAPPAPORT especially since I heard he was producing a television series that needed writers. Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-a-alcohol. Mighty Healthy’s spokesmodel 40Diesel had the VIP area locked down. He and I left the Mighty Healthy bash when the obama was declared a wrap at about 2am. We know well enough to let the kids with no jobs stick around until last call.

Plus the best part of any wild obama night is the Gray’s Papaya as the closeout.

shouts to my boy SERG on the camera and his wifey status DANIELLE

mh dp