Archive for March, 2007

SELLING BLACKNESS…

Saturday, March 31st, 2007

slave market

Do I ever tell you good folks how much I appreciate the time you spend over here? I’m trying to cull images and simultaneously write several different drops for this site. All the while my head keeps slumping as I fight my fatigue with Bacardi mixed with Apple & Eve Fruit Punch. It’s 100% juice bitches! The grape drink is for Passover. I write these drops at 3-5am and I know they have to be pockmarked with spelling and grammatical errors on the regulack. Thank you for holding your own against my failings.

I don’t know how I feel about celebrations for no good reason, but I just noticed that I have eclipsed more than 1500+ posts for this website. That’s pretty good shit even if I say so myself. I’ve had help from friends old and new and I only ask that your committment to my success remains the same. Ha. No seriously. I regard my success at this site solely in the dialougue that is inspired. I’m a comments junkie. This is why I don’t run ad banners here. I don’t want you to leave DP Dot Com. I don’t want you to click away from here. If you do leave me for a minute then visit the sites on my blogroll. They’re good folks I think.

This is going to be one of those drops that just floats around my head space for awhile.

“I got so much trouble on my mind,
refuse to lose,
here’s your ticket,
hear the drummer get wicked.”


I have wanted to get on here and rip the television show ‘The Wire’ a new asshole. This is some bullshit they are perpetrating, blah, blah, blah, because ultimately, no matter how many center city public schools you have taught in, you cannot tell the ultimate ghetto story. You can’t do it because your real life still frames your values and morality. To get down to the bone gristle, the bone marrow of a situation, you have to live the life. You have to taste the despair firsthand and then let it overwhelm you so that your humanity pours out of you. You have to be empty and cold as ice.

R.I.P. WILLIAM LEWIS a/k/a ‘BILLY BANG’
The last of the Peter Pans came to rest in a Corona Queens barbershop Wednesday afternoon. All the evening news programs had a 15 second segment of the story. 15 minutes of fame = 15 seconds of infamy when being ‘hood rich is all you know. I will do a drop on my little big homey, BILLY BANG later this year.

“hit ya back split ya,
fuck fist fights and lame scuffles,
pillow case to your face make the shell muffle,
shoot your daughter in the calf muscle,
fuck a tussle nickel-plated,
sprinkle coke on the floor make it drug related,
most hated”


GOD bless the white man. In his supreme benevolence he has decided to appoint Uncle Ben the C.E.O. of the brand that makes Uncle Ben’s Converted Rice. Ha! Uncle Ben you still a dumb azz nigga. It took you over fifty years to finally get a raise. Jay-Z and HUSTLE $IMMON$ were C.E.O.’s in a fraction of that time. I suppose the next corporate makeover will be homeboy from the Cream of Wheat boxes and then finally Aunt Jemima.

coonface

Stroker & Hoop: My Adult Swim Fix…

Saturday, March 31st, 2007

squidbillies

Along with my number one show – ‘SquidBillies’.

Peep this classic S & H episode hosted courtesy of Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim programming.

‘Hip-Hop Hooray a/k/a Gangsta Sap’

This was the episode where Stroker & Hoop have to go undercover to solve the assault and robbery at the mansion of gangsta rap legend MC Homicidal Rapist. As usual, Stroker & Hoop bite off more than they can chew. The shit is hee fucking larious and the best part is the role played by Homicidal Rapist weed carrier sidekick Lil’ Rapist.

Cartoons are the smartest shit going on the televison. With Adult Swim on the internets I can get my fix without ever turning on the T.V.

Back From The Brink Of Insanity…

Friday, March 30th, 2007

birth machine

In the early 90’s when acid was way better than it is now I might have dropped a tablet or twenty. What can I say for myself other than I was young, and invincible, and stupid. During my trips to the outer rim of the universe my homey JOJO McQUEEN introduced me to the work of this Austrian cat named HANS RUEDIS GIGER. He operates under the professional name of H.R. GIGER. Dude is part genius, part gypsy and what seems to be mostly German. This explains the apocalyptic savagery in his art.

jehrico

GIGER created the artwork that inspired the design for the creature from the ‘Alien’ movie series. It looks like a skeleton that has been fitted with pneumatic valves and tubing. It’s obviously a machine that has a singular purpose. I wonder what type of shit dude was dropping in order to create these paintings. I just remember what shit I was on in order to appreciate their detail.

alien

alien

alien

alien

MLB FACIAL HAIR R.I.P.

Thursday, March 29th, 2007

billy ball

You already know…

MLB’s FACIAL HAIR HALL OF FAME

Thursday, March 29th, 2007

reggie and pops

REGGIE and Pops

I’m excited for the upcoming season of Major League baseball for a bunch of reasons. It’s the sixtieth anniversary of JACKIE ROBINSON’s entrance into the majors, BARRY BONDS will likely become the new all time home run leader, the Mets will pwn the league, and the whole human growth hormone has been silenced ever since it became apparent that the entire league was on it (read: beloved WHITE athletes). I even joined an Internets Celebrities roto league. Looks like good times all around this summer.

This drop was inspired by OSCAR GAMBLE’s favorite website on the internets, Passion Of The Weiss. He had the idea for giving a shout out to MLB’s greatest moustached mavericks and mavens. Don’t act like it was only porn stars that sported the ridiculous facial hair from our youths. Baseball players were the real mutton chop superstars. From LUIS TIANT to MIKE SCHMIDT, seventies baseball was all about crappy polyester uniforms and personal style below the nose.

The Californian teams in the big leagues were certainly the fashion forward leaders in the facial hair movement. The San Diego Padres alone could field an entire squad of facial hair Hall of Fame players. Add in the Angels, the A’s and L.A. and you’ve got yourself a mountain of moustaches. Combine that with some of the greatest afros evar and you are talking about a follicle apex for American culture. When steroids and HGH came into the great American pastime hair would never grow the same. But I’m not into placing asterisks over afros…

Here’s the DP Dot Com list of the facial hair Hall of Famers…

george foster GEORGE FOSTER
By the time he came to the Mets after his years with the Big Red Machine GEORGE’s bat didn’t have the same pop, but hotdamnit his moustache sideburn connection was still on some official ‘grown man in the club’ status.

DOYLE ALEXANDER
Dude needed more than his sideburns to cover those sonar scoops he had for ears.
doyle alexander

cecil cooper CECIL COOPER
I gotta make sure I put one in for LM so he doesn’t retract his sponsorship.

GREG LUZINSKI
Chicago native GREG put in crazy work with the Philadelphia Phillies, but he could still bring it in his Chi-Town uniform when his drunk ass made it to the ballpark. Just like another of Chicago’s favorite sons and longtime DP Dot Commie, P-CITY.
greg luzinski

amos otis AMOS OTIS
This one is para mi amigo grande en la Ciudad de Kansas. AMOS was all about bringing shaft back to baseball.

“Shut Yo’ Mouth!”

I’m just talking about OTIS’ batting skills.


johnny damon

JOHNNY DAMON
“So easy even a caveman could do it”

DAVE WINFIELD
Did y’all cats know that DAVE WINFIELD was drafted by a pro football team despite the fact that he never played a single down in high school or college? And CHARLIE effin’ WARD wins a Heisman but didn’t get a single call. Facial hair = draft day hype.
dave winfield

rollie fingers ROLLIE FINGERS
ROLLIE was without question one of the greatest to ever do it. His Snidely Whiplash moustache should be telling you that much.

OZZIE SMITH
The Wizard of Oz was stylin’ on fools from the moment he came into the league.
ozzie smith

goose gossage GOOSE GOSSAGE
San Diego damn near had the entire facial hair All-Star squad. GOOSE GOSSAGE was just a big ol’ burly country boy who threw fire from his fist. Nothing subtle or sneaky in his repetoire, just fast, and faster.

DAVE PARKER
Can you imagine his gaudy career numbers if big DAVE PARKER had played during the steroids era?
dave parker

steve bedrosian

STEVE BEDROSIAN
STEVE reminds me of MICHAEL McDONALD. Remember that Yacht Rock hit song that STEVE and KENNY LOGGINS made together? Yeah, it seemed like only yesterday…

mike schmidt MIKE SCHMIDT
Show some mother effin’ respect to the Jewfro when you see them on the streets.

BRUCE SUTTER
There’s no relief in sight from the gangsta of homey’s birdnest beard.
bruce sutter

reggie jackson REGGIE JACKSON
The big homey had his own candy bar.

RON CEY
I’d swear that he retired from the Dodgers to do porn with his moustache.
ron cey

don stanhouse DON STANHOUSE
DON pimped his matching afro and moustache style all the way into the 1980’s.

OSCAR GAMBLE
OSCAR is the G.F.H.H.O.F.O.A.T. of this shit. Right off the bat take into consideration the fact that his initials are O.G.

The sideburns and nappy moustache are official, but the afro is straight up on some HGH. That’s word to Oh Word!

oscar gamble

oscar G