Archive for the ‘Harpers Weekly Review’ Category

« Older Entries
Newer Entries »

Send In The Clones…

Monday, December 8th, 2008

clone

Greeks are still the most hardbody body politic. Right behind their cousins from Palestine. There have been riots for two days in Greece behind the shooting death of an unarmed teenager by the police. This is similar to the shit that popped off in Paris when I was there several years back.

Those of us here in the United States are kind of used to the police taking a life every now and then so we don’t get too bent out of shape. Even when that shit is done from point blank range and put on video. Maybe there’ll be a march and prA’li a few television appearances from AL SHARPTON, but not too much else in the way of venting frustration.

I think the problem in Greece is that there is too much affordable food. If there were less food to eat in Greece I can bet you that those anarchist punk kids would be trading in their molotov cocktails for olives and figs.

That’s what people are doing in Compton, California. This is a place where the economy is so fucked the fuck up that the thugs are trading in their guns for food stamps since there are no more employed people left to rob.

Read this shit -> In lean times, SoCal residents trade guns for food.

Posted in Harpers Weekly Review, Ninjas, No Boutros Boutros... Ghali, Social Upheaval | 6 Comments »

POLITRICKS 2008: Carded At The Door…

Monday, December 8th, 2008

obaama

Don’t confirm those plans to attend the presidential inauguration in January just yet. There is a fringe movement to unseat OBAAMA on the basis that he isn’t really a natural born American citizen. I’m pretty sure he was birthed naturally, as opposed to C-section, but the debate is over whether he was born in these United States. Slate online mag picks up the controversy…

Change They Can Litigate

This story is being pushed forward by a group that was at one time near and dear to my heart – the 9-11 conspiracy theorists. If these people think that BARACK OBAAMA is foreigner (no I Want To Know What Love Is) then they really are nutjobs. Don’t you think grimey ass HILARY RODHAM would have pulled that rabbit out of her twat already? Chea.

This sounds like a perfect storm for which to create a national ID card in order to keep people’s info centralized and controlled. Birth certificate x Social Security info x IRS statement all in one handy place, namely the hand via RFID implant. In this way we can just scan the right hands of presidential candidates before they place them on the bible, or Ko’ran, or whatever.

Posted in Harpers Weekly Review, HUFF YOU!, Politricks, Separated @ Birth, Social Upheaval, Wig Owners | 5 Comments »

The Legacy Of G DUBBZ?

Tuesday, December 2nd, 2008

fett

As the new year approaches and the president-elect fills his administration with a collective of Beltway veterans that will insure the fruit doesn’t fall too far from the money tree I wondered what might be the legacy that G DUBBZ leaves the White House with?

Many people will call him the dumbest president of all time. I’m sure this isn’t the truth. G DUBBZ may have been a better overall actor than even BILL CLINTON. Dumb presidents don’t get re-elected. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice and I’m the dummy. Someone needs to give credit to this man for making at least half of this country believe the words that came from his mouth.

In eight years G DUBBZ managed to lift the veil of American civilian dominance from all over the globe. The tragedy of 9-11. The dual wars in Afghanistan and Iraq which ultimately produced bumper crops in opium and oil production. The failed emergency responses during Hurricane(s) Katrina and Ike. The erosion of our constitutional freedoms and the catastrophic collapse of our currency.

With all of these things to weigh down his record the biggest thing that I see is the privatization of our armed forces. This is the symbolic pathway to the destruction of our nation. We are fast moving away from an army that serves the American flag to a confederation of private contractors like BlackWater and Halliburton who have no national allegiance. This was put in motion two decades ago under the line-item theme of budget cutting.

The accountability in the Pentagon became less but the billion dollar contractor invoices increased exponentially. Do you know who set this shit in motion. The former Secretary of Defense under GEORGE BUSH Sr. and current Vice President under G DUBBZ – DICK CHENEY. These men engineered the takeover of this country and no one even knew what the fuck happened until they were on the Dreadnought headed to Coruscant.

I still had fun complaining through these eight years and I will miss these greedy fools for at least the fact that I won’t get to post these images any longer. C’est la vie.

the boss of bosses

grand moff cheney

darth dubya

condarth

Posted in Black Bullshit, Harpers Weekly Review, HUFF YOU!, Politricks, Social Upheaval, When I Reminisce..., Wig Owners | 3 Comments »

Militarize ‘Dem Yout…

Monday, December 1st, 2008

nerf gun

Have you noticed that more children’s toys have been focusing on guns and other military related items? I mean more than usual? I think this works on parents and children on different psychological levels.

Parents typically see Nerf guns and G.I. Joe as benign toys with no ulterior motives. People identify Nerf products as soft and harmless sponge toys, while G.I. Joe has been an American toy staple for over four decades. G.I. Joe also has other media that supports the sale of the merchandise.

I feel like military themed toys promote the idea of military service in children as well as a level of familiarity with the industrial apparatus that the military accesses (vehicles, firearms, jargon, etc.).

This may not end up being such a bad thing if our economy takes too long to rebound. The only work may very well be in the army and the other paramilitary units that will be responsible for maintaining the order here in the States when Wal-Mart shoppers go berserk.

Addendum: Holy shit! The revolution has begun as workers in China start riot at, of all places, the Nerf toy factory.

Posted in C.R.E.A.M., Fanboy Ish, Harpers Weekly Review, Social Upheaval, When I Reminisce..., Wig Owners | 7 Comments »

NIGGY PREXYS THRU HISTORY…

Friday, November 28th, 2008

2 dollar bill

By now most of you have heard the story of JOHN HANSON who is pictured on the back of the $2 dollar bill. HANSON has often been cited as the first United States president since Congress had been newly formed and the Articles of the Confederation had just been drafted prior to his presiding over the office.

The other myth bandied about regarding HANSON is that he was a bit niggy. You know, slightly jiggy. Exactly like our current president-elect who is also slightly lightly niggy. If we are to believe the internets rumors regarding JOHN HANSON then BARACK OBAMA would not be our first almost jig president which could have a crippling effect on the OBAMA economic stimulus plan which I believe is to allow everyone to sell buttons and t-shirts with his likeness at street fairs.

To throw even more confusion into the Black president argument is the news that there may have been at least a half dozen other presidents who have had ‘one drop‘ in their bloodlines. The list includes THOMAS JEFFERSON, ANDREW JACKSON, ABRAHAM LINCOLN, WARREN HARDING, CALVIN COOLIDGE and DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER. There is a ring of truth to this rumor and I decided to examine these presidents for myself to see if I could determine their ethnicity for all posterity.

T jeff THOMAS JEFFERSON
We all know that THOMAS JEFFERSON kept time with a Black chick but so did that underwear model who dropped off inside of HALLE BERRY’s uterus. The real proof of Blackness to me is whether or not this president has a hardbody nickname and whether or not he hates Black people.

No one has better nicknames than Black people, and no one hates Black people as much as other Black people.

Nickname: T-Jay

Hate for Blacks: High. JEFFERSON decried, “[t]he amalgamation of whites with blacks produces a degradation to which no lover of his country, no lover of excellence in the human character, can innocently consent.” All the while JEFFERSON dropped off several loads in a slave named SALLY HEMMINGS who may have been the half sister of his wife yet he never publicly acknowledged his offspring.

Verdict: JEFFERSON’s slick nickname combined with his deadbeat dad status definitely makes him part niggy.

a jax ANDREW JACKSON
I’m not really surprised that ANDREW JACKSON was Black. There is a high school in Queens bearing his namesake that even Black kids are fearful to attend. I think that is JACKSON exerting his influence from the grave.

Nickname: A-Jax

Hate for Blacks: Meh. A-Jax was a nickname befitting this president since he was a god of war. Instead of placing his foot deep in the asses of the African chattel, JACKSON was too busy slaughtering the native Americans. Ever heard of the ‘Trail Of Tears’? That was JACKSON’s version of the Iraq War ‘Shock and Awe’.

Verdict: JACKSON was a slave holder because it made him rich, not because he hated himself. Not jiggy.

link ABRAHAM LINCOLN
The fact that ABRAHAM LINCOLN freed the slaves should be proof of his lack of niggyness. Yes, his wife looks somewhat ethnic. That is more on the account of the hardscrabble life that people lived in those times. If you spent the entire day outside of the house farming you would look like her too.

There were those rumors that LINCOLN might have been a DL brother.

Nickname: Link

Hate for Blacks: Meh. Just like BARACK OBAMA, the Blacks put LINCOLN into office. Not by voting though, but by being a political pitfall. Freeing slaves in 1858 = raising taxes on the rich in 2008.

Verdict: LINCOLN was the prototype white liberal who only knew one Black dude. The guy that shined his shoes.

hardbody WARREN HARDING
WARREN HARDING wasn’t a player but he definitely crushed a lot. He had several extra-marital affairs during his career in politricks. With my sincerest apologies to TONI MORRISON, MAYA ANGELOU and B.E.T.’s BOB JOHNSON, but BILL CLINTON fails because cheating on your wife doesn’t make you a Black man.

Having Black family members usually does and HARDING’s cousins are hell’a Black.

Nickname: Warren G

Hate for Blacks: High. HARDING denied his family in order to get elected into the presidency.

Verdict: HARDING died of a heart attack at the age of 57. He was blacker than Black.

cool cal CALVIN COOLIDGE
Right on the heels of the fateful demise of Warren G we have another could be Black president. I remember this president mostly for the alcoholic beverage that used his namesake I enjoyed in my early teens. Good times.

COOLIDGE presided over a government that turned its back to the machinations of greedy businessmen and ended up putting America into the Great Depression.

Nickname: Cool Cal

Hate for Blacks: Meh. Cash ruled everything around him (no Wu-Tang on the hook).

Verdict: CALVIN COOLIDGE may have had cool in his name but his presidency was like school on Saturday night. No class. And definitely nah jiggy.

icey d DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER
Despite all the difficulties that Blacks were having stateside in this country EISENHOWER’s presidency was still an unprecedented period of capitalistic growth for America. Since this drop isn’t about America’s economic growth, but her spiritual ascension I should also note that EISENHOWER did sign the Civil Rights Acts of 1957 and 1960 into law. These two(2) laws were enacted to protect the voting rights of all citizens.

Nickname: Ice D

Hate for Blacks: Not so much. EISENHOWER championed the Brown vs. Board of Ed Supreme Court ruling.

Verdict: Ice D wasn’t Black nor was he actually white. He was a military man which is some kind of greyish olive green. While EISENHOWER may not have been as progressive as he could have been with regards to civil rights of African Americans he did speak out against the burgeoning military-industrial copmplex. Not enough to get his ass merc’ked like KENNEDY, but enough.

Posted in Black Bullshit, Harpers Weekly Review, HUFF YOU!, Ninjas, Politricks, Social Upheaval, Talking Shit, When I Reminisce..., white, Wig Owners | 12 Comments »

« Older Entries
Newer Entries »