As the television and screenwriter’s guild strike enters its second month I made a trip to the picket lines to see if the writers were steadfast in their commitment to a better and more fair working contract.
Some of the writers had even decided to give up sex during the strike. Masturbation? Not so much.
Look out for a picket plaque that reads “ONAN 4 CONAN”.
For more information on the writers guild strike and what you can do to help these union members receive the equity for their work, go to the Writers Guild of America – East website.
After I watched ‘Talledega Nights’ I was a bit puzzled as to why I liked the JOHN C. REILLY portrayal of the Cal Naughton Jr. character so much, and why his voice seemed so familiar to me. It just now struck me that the voice I was remembering so fondly was that of the lovable loser, Pete Puma.
The Looney Tunes episode with Pete Puma went something like this…
Pete Puma chases a small rabbit into the warren where Bugs Bunny lives. Bugs asked the small rabbit what the problem was. The small rabbit explained his situation and who was after him. Bugs already knew it was Pete Puma giving the little rabbit agita. Bugs then sets out to teach Pete Puma a lesson. It’s one that Pete Puma will likely forget since he is a total burnout spaz.
What makes me laugh out loud is Pete Puma’s glee that he can never contain. He laughs at his own unfunny jokes and he totally wears his heart on his sleeve. I almost feel bad for him when he tells Bugs how many lumps he wants to receive. And right on cue, Bugs gives the man what he’s asking for.
Pete Puma never learns his lesson however and his mind is bent on somehow tricking the little rabbit away from the protection of Bugs Bunny. The next time the rabbits encounter Pete Puma he has disguised himself as “Mrs. Rabbit”.
Bugs Bunny isn’t one to let the opportunity for a social visit go by unrequited so out comes the tea set again for even the homely “Mrs. Rabbit”. Pete Puma has had his fill of tea though. For some reason or the other it gives him a headache.
Even coffee doesn’t seem to favor Pete Puma on this day. For the final scene Bugs Bunny and the little rabbit set Pete Puma up to get his lumps bigtime. And just like the chump that Pete Puma is he falls right into the trap.
JOHN C. REILLY is an accomplished stage and film actor, but his greatest role has been re-creating the voice of the beloved doofus Pete Puma.
Shout outs to STAN FREBERG and the great MEL BLANC.
I stayed up late last night watching one of the greatest cinematic classics featuring a futuristic dystopia. ‘Escape From New York’ was a campy cult action movie when it first dropped. It was directed by JOHN CARPENTER whose claim to fame was the thriller ‘Halloween’.
In this film CARPENTER tells the story of a famous war hero turned criminal named Snake Plisken who is sent onto the prison colony of Manhattan island to rescue the president of the United States. In a scene that is so eerily omniscient of September 11th, 2001 the president’s plane has been hijacked and crashed into a skyscraper by nuclear arms anti-proliferation terrorists. Just prior to the crash the president is evacuated from the plane via an indestructible pod. Once the pod has landed the president is captured by the gang leader who runs the prison colony, the Duke of New York.
‘Escape From New York’ is fun and farcical. The movie was made in 1980 and they imagined that twenty years in the future we would still be using cassette tapes for audio recordings. The cellular phones and short wave radios were all fucking ginormous and even the government computers in the future had advanced little farther than the ENIAC machines of our grandparent’s recollection.
Despite the look of the movie being hokey and remarkably low budget for even an early 80’s flick this shit is one of my favorite joints of all time. First of all, JOHN CARPENTER is one of the GOAT filmmakers along with KUBRICK, LUCAS, SPIELBERG and my nigga JOHN STAGLIANO (peep the Buttman in Budapest series).
Secondly, this movie has a lineup of sick ass actors. KURT RUSSELL plays the lead role of Snake Plisken. FYI, RUSSELL is one of the best B movie actors in the game. He’s elevated B movies to A- minus status.
Black Moses makes an appearance as well. Before ISAAC HAYES assumed the role of the chef on South Park he played the fuck out of the Duke of New York.
When we were going all 1980’s teen wood crazy I neglected to mention my brunette babysitter ADRIENNE BARBIEU. She’s up in this piece with the tittays just as big and beautiful as ever. Wait until you see how ol’ girl gets merc’ked by the Duke. She literally has her wig peeled. This is a JOHN CARPENTER joint so you know he has to put a little something gruesome into his flicks. Just like I have to talk about sneakers and doodee.
The third important factor I love about this film was CARPENTER’s attention to NYC details. He captured a nice feel for some of New York’s long gone landmarks. Namely the Twin Towers and the old Madison Square Garden that was up by Lincoln Center.
Lastly, CARPENTER killed shit with his funky theme song. You can’t tell me this shit ain’t hardbody.
‘Escape From New York’ title track
Has anyone sampled this shit already? My nigga JOELL ORTIZ needs to get up on that joint and spit some escape from New York firestarter lyrics. And you need to NetFlix ‘Escape From New York’ so you have some good shit to hold you down on a wind-chilled weeknight.
I’ll send my DVD copy to the first person who tells me the real name of the actor who played the taxi dude that drives Snake around NYC.
ERNIE PANNICCIOLI might be the definitive Hip-Hop historian since his photographic images encompass more than 30 years of the culture’s evolution and progress through America. ERNIE has been commenting on my drops since before I had a website. The great thing about ERNIE is that he owns a personal bullshit filter on his brain which doesn’t allow him to gladhand anyone. At over six feet and 240 lbs. ERNIE doesn’t mind telling you how he feels about your shit.
I’m lucky to have him on my team for several reasons, none more important than the fact that he doesn’t lie. Just like Combat Jack he delivers his opinion unfiltered and unbiased by anything other than truth. If ERNIE says it then you can best believe that he lives it. He reminds me of my dad because they both come from the old, OLD school. If a man doesn’t have his word, he has nothing is the mantra.
So I got the idea after some recent comments by ERNIE to put up the images of some possible DP Dot Com Fantasy Poon Tang contestants. These are the women that I might possibly have sex with if they are the last women on Earth, and I am the last man, and we are on a deserted island, and they are unconscious (just how I like my sweet action). The question then becomes this…
What Would ERNIE Do?!?
Pregnant HALLE BERRY
The main reason I’m giving HALLE backshots is because I want to ‘Superman’ DAVID JUSTICE’s old ho. They do say pregnant loving is so juicy that you have to wear scuba equipment when you go down on it.
What would ERNIE do?!?
Bearded R&B Chanteuse ALICIA KEYS
I’m not so much into chicks that let their chest hairs grow extra long, or females that give other men handshakes with the soulbrother grip and the extra ‘100’ pat on the back, but I feel like I need to get some of this musical hoodrats sweetness just because I know that no other men are tasting it either.
What would ERNIE do?!?
Midget Lover JANET JACKSON
I’ve been waiting to drink her bathwater since ‘Good Times’ was on television. Her and Tootie were my first crushes. Despite all the nonsense that JANET perpetrates now with her fake boyfriend, and despite the fact that she conspired with her family to lock her daughter in the basement of the Jackson estate I must fulfill my destiny. The picture to the left is how JANET will always look in my mind’s eye.
What would ERNIE do?!?
Stinkbooty STAR JONES
Everything was easy on the eyes up to this point, but this is why your boy BILLY SUNDAY is the most hardbody blogger evar. The Hollywood rumors were that STAR JONES took a bath even LESS than her ghey husband peeped her slot. That would be the number between zero and never. So why am I going in on this nasty piece of Black tail? To get next on VIVICA FOX’s ghetto booty.
I love giving away free shit here at DP Dot Com. Consider this shit your payment for your loyalty to coming here to eff with me on a Saturday. I’m sure you could be doing something else with your spare time like…
having sex with someone
getting drunk, or and getting high
taking(actually leaving) a shit
So for spending your time with me, and since I consider time to be money I will repay you a copy of QUENTIN TARANTINO’s ‘DeathProof’. This movie was part of the double feature ‘Grindhouse’ that Q.T. and ROBERT RODRIGUEZ produced. Shit features my latest baby mama ROSARIO DAWSON along with some other hot pieces of poon. These ladies aren’t just kick ass cunts either. They are cunts that will kick your out-of-pocket ass.
My local video store(no FREE promo bitches) had a three for twenty sale so I copped three pieces with the idea of giving them all away. Get in where you fit in if you like to see some outrageous action.
