I was feeling like smoothing things out a little something from all the recent guitar and metal vibes that were being posted. YouTube had just what I was looking for…
Archive for July, 2006
BILLY SUNDAY’s LATE NITE FUNK FLIX
Saturday, July 8th, 2006CHAPPELLE’s Show Is For Sell Outs
Friday, July 7th, 2006
CHAPPELLE’s ill-fated televsion program resumes this weekend and I wonder how many of you fucks will be tuned in to watch his antics. Even though CHAPPELLE himself asked folks not to support this season because of the salty way that Comedy Central gangstered the footage I am sure that most of you could give less than a rat’s azz and you will support the network. You don’t have to lie to me because your cable/satellite provider knows exactly what network that your set is tuned into and they will make the report to Nielsen anyhoo without your consent.
This is why I choose not to fuck with white or Black people. Both will stab you in the back for their own petty interests, money, entertainment, whatever. NEAL BRENNAN flipped on DAVE CHAPPELLE even though they had been having success for over ten years. What would I expect from you people who have no loyalty to anyone, not even GOD. Enjoy the CHAPPELLE Show you selfish bastards.
Mothers I’d Love To F…
Friday, July 7th, 2006
Did anyone catch this news byte about the 59year old New Jersey woman having twins? I am bugging out because it’s not like she was doing this to help out her fallow daughter-in-law, but she did this on the strength that she wanted more kids. That got me thinking to how many grandmothers out there are giving up that sweet-aged Power U. Think about a fine wine that sits in an oak cask for decades and then gets brought out for some fancy reception. The bouquet, the taste, are both refined and exquisite.
There are some women that are like a fine Bordeaux. Their Power U has been sitting inside their drawls for decades and whenever it gets let out to breathe it’s like a rose garden or something. That is why you can’t sleep on some of these grown azz women. They have been meditating on the force of their stinky love bush and they know how to use it like a Jedi master or some shit. When we leave this place none of us are sure where we’ll be going, but one thing is for sure, and that’s we all know from where we came. Here’s a quick list of the places that I’d like to visit.
BTW, this post has been stamped with approval by ZILLA.
M.I.L.F. (from 30yrs old to 49yrs old)
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ANGELA BASSETT Even though IKE TURNER put a hardbody whupping on her azz and then TAYE DIGGS scraped it too, I still consider homegirl to be the ‘Chocolate Truth’. |
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UMA THURMAN I was hot for her after I saw this flick called Gattaca. Sweet snowflake poon. |
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VANESSA WILLIAMS Miss America nigga! And don’t you ever forget it. |
G.I.L.F. (from 50yrs old to 69yrs old)
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PATTI LaBELLE You already know how I feel ’bout Mz.PATTI. |
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KIM BASINGER PRINCE and ALEC BALDWIN both put in 9 1/2 weeks on this sweet piece of white meat. The truth is that sloppy seconds is all I wanted in the first place. |
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DEBBIE ALLEN Fame nigga! I wanna live forever! |
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PHYLICIA ALLEN-RASHAD Awwwww ish, a sister two fer one. My dream would be to tell Theo that me and his momma are jammin’ it on the one. |
G.G.I.L.F. (from 70yrs old to eternity)
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SOPHIA LOREN MICHAEL might be crazy, but he ain’t stupid. I would still let my face be her toilet seat. She hasn’t cracked after seven decades so you know what that really means. |
***MOST HONORABLE MENTION***
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LENA HORNE Mz.LENA has done it all in her illustrious career. Trust me that you don’t even want to know how Animal got his nickname?!? |
More Wall Crawling For The Web Heads…
Friday, July 7th, 2006
I am like a crack fiend on YouTube searching for clips of the new Spiderman movie. I think that this series has been able to maintain its continuity of action, intrigue and drama by keeping all of the creative people together for the project. I hope TOBEY MAGUIRE does at least a dozen of these films. Playing James Bond didn’t hurt SEAN CONNERY in the long run although nowadays I might have to cast him as one of Bond’s enemies.
YouTube is like crack without getting lipburn from a pipe.
GAY DWYANE Gets More Pantyhose
Friday, July 7th, 2006
The Miami Heat are poised to offer stocking fetishist DWYANE WADE more than $17mil a year to spend on pantyhose and M.A.C. lipglass for kissing SHAQ’s ass.
The running of the bulls started early this year when the Chicago Bulls mascot was charged with running from the authorities.
BEN WALLACE to Chicago!?!
The Knicks still suck.