Archive for February, 2008

POLITRICKS 2008: Super Delegates And Detention Centers…

Thursday, February 14th, 2008

chaingang

I learned a little something about the Democratic Party “Super Delegates” the other day. These dudes are essentially where the buck stops when the party decides to nominate their presidential candidate. The Super Delegates make up forty-percent(40%) of the total that a candidate needs in order to secure the party nod. You could theoretically have more delegates in your corner, but if you have less Super Delegates down with you then you get no soup. The Super Delegates system was inserted by the Democrats in order to stabilize the power of the party’s centrist, elitist establishment. Super Delegates are what seems to me to be the return to backroom deal making politricks.

Another interesting set of informational figures has passed through my inbox via my Editor-in-Chief, C.S. There hasn’t been too much rhetoric from the Democratic candidates on what they intend to do with America’s burgeoning prison industrial complex. The rapid manufacturing de-industrialization of America has proportionately filled the jails. Incidentally, more African Americans were imprisoned under the Clinton Administration than any previous two term presidency, including G DUBBZ. I wonder if MAYA ANGELOU realizes that when the caged bird sings it speaks the CLINTON’s names?

Take a look at the essay here on BlackAgendaReport.com via AlterNet.

2008’s Ten Worst Places to Be Black

What I would like to know is how the fuck Iowa locks up 13.59 Black people for every single white in the state, yet Blacks comprise only 2% of the states population?!? BARACK OBAAMA won the Iowa primary too. I guess voters in the hawkeye state were just happy to see a Black that they weren’t incarcerating.

Wisconsin is another state that locks up Blacks to the tune of over 10 to 1 over whites. So if you aren’t playing for the Green Bay Packers or attending Wisconsin U. your Black ass is going to the hoosegow. OBAAMA’s also got the delegate lead in Wisconsin as well.

Colorado and Kansas both lockup about 7 Blacks for every white which makes me think of these states as downright progressive when compared to Iowa. Lo and behold that OBAAMA has pwned the delegate count in both these states. In Colorado, OBAAMA leads CLINTON 37-17 and in Kansas his edge is slightly greater at 26-10. Colorado and Kansas are both typical red states that usually support conservative leaning social policies. I wonder how it has been that OBAAMA has translated into a viable candidate for these voters? Maybe the mainstream media’s description of these constituencies has been wrong all along. Kansas stand up. Even though you put your entire Black population in jail you’re still liberal minded voters.

CNN.com Election Center 2008 Primaries and Caucuses

What really blew my mind was how the BlackAgendaReport study knocks the doors off the idea that the southern states are worse for Blacks when they are within the justice system.

STATE – BLACK-WHITE DISPARITY
New Jersey – 13.15 to one
Connecticut – 12.77 to one
Minnesota – 12.63 to one
Pennsylvania – 10.53 to one
New York – 9.47 to one

Guess what? If you are going through the justice system in the New York tri-state area then your ass is fucked the fuck up. Philadelphia and Pittsburgh make Pennsylvania pretty bad for Blacks too. Plus Minnesota?!? Where the hell does Minnesota get all these Black people to incarcerate? Can you imagine a prison in Minnesota being filled with felons all dressed up like Prince? [ll].

chaingang

JANET vs. BeYONCE: WIG OUT!

Thursday, February 14th, 2008

wigs

These two entertainers are what settles for the triple threat of singing and dancing actresses in the year 2008. The truth is that both BeYONCE and JANET couldn’t act their ample asses out of a paper bag, but their wigs deserve academy awards.

If you have ever watched a BeYONCE video then you already know that her wigs display more on screen charisma than her face can convey. Similarly, JANET JACKSON lets her wigs not only act for her, but occasionally they even dance. JANET is still doing the same shoulder shrug move from her PAULA ABDUL days, at least her wigs have learned some new dance steps. Let’s take a look at some of the wigs of these two great Wig Owners.

BeYONCE has more wigs than anyone else has had in their mid-thirties save for the Boss, DIANA ROSS. BeYONCE’s wigs go from straight and sassy, to out of control hussy curls. The added feature of BeYONCE’s wigs are all the diverse blahnge tints that she uses depending on her moods.

wigs

JANET JACKSON is a master Wig mistress who displays different colors and lengths at will. The last time I believe I saw JANET’s scalp was in the 1970’s on ‘Good Times’.

wigs

Here’s a look at JANET’s most recent music video for her single ‘Feedback’. Yes, that is milk that she is dancing in. I give JANET points for that since the only feedback that milk gives me is from my backside.


JANET JACKSON – ‘Feedback’

BeYONCE covers TINA TURNER’s ‘Proud Mary’ much to the dismay of Mrs. TURNER. However, BeYONCE’s wig does do TINA proud.

BeYONCE – ‘Proud Mary’

You Know We Keep That White Girl by MAXINE

Wednesday, February 13th, 2008

prince paul party

Editor’s note: If it is Black History Month then you know how Prince Paul is doing his thing at A.P.T. DP Dot Com’s very own evolutionary journalist MAXINE takes a hot line and makes it a hotter blog.

I was hood-winked! Bamboozled! Led astray! How could I, a so-called fan of Hip Hop, believe for one flying second that a rapper would actually tell a white girl to “get the fuck off the stage!”? Paris Hilton? Puh-leease. She’ll throw you out. Shit, she’ll throw your mother out. Fuck outta here.

Reportedly during a party at the Sundance Film Festival, Curtis and crew were performing and some blonde white chick resembling Paris Hilton (don’t they all resemble Paris Hilton?) jumped on stage to which Fif responded, “Get the fuck off my stage!” Hilton, crying, was then removed from the stage protesting that, “It’s my birthday party!” I should have known this story was too good to be true, besides, Paris and Fif have always been chummy, but maybe, just maybe someone was sick of her shit. Eh, wishful thinking young Max, wishful thinking.

paris fisty

According to Whoo Kid, it was “some security guard nigga” that got kicked off the stage. Reason? The “nigga kept picking shit up off the stage, pushing people back while we was performing.” What? First of all, I don’t give a fuck who is getting thrown off a stage at a fucking 50 Cent concert, but these cats kicked the nigga off the stage for doing his job? Security guard right? So he was um well, securing some shit. Anyway, Paris was right down front, doing that slightly altered dancing thing that cute white girls with blonde hair do at rap concerts.

This is not about Paris Hilton. This is not about 50 Cent. The real story does not surprise me at all, for ages white girls have been using Hip Hop to gain credibility in circles for which they were truly never built. Paris Hilton is a perfect case in point. This is more about the relationships between white women and Black men that go far beyond the “Rapture.”

The media and people who conduct sociology polls will have you believe that more relationships between Black men and white women in modern society shows progress in our desire to relinquish the chains that bound us to slavery. Some take the less kum-by-ya approach and believe that Frances Cress Welsing’s theory about the system of White Supremacy has a little more to do with it.

seal heidi

According to Welsing, the system attacks nine key areas of people’s activity. I know it’s Black History Month but some of you are just going to have to pick up a fucking book to learn the whole concept. I’m focusing on the most familiar part, sex. It is the positioning of a Black man’s ability to “force” himself on white females, leaving the blemish of coloring, which makes this type of relationship so feared in our society, then and today.

It is not an uncommon theory that Black men who date white women are doing so for that pleasurable stroking sensation to the ego that comes with bucking society’s rules and causing frenzy amongst those who really run this shit. Having a blonde on your arm for the company Christmas party is a plus too. We know that this is really a challenge to the white male dominance that has plagued Black men for a million years; you don’t win an arm wrestling match by reaching for your wallet right? The only way to win an arm wrestling match is by having the bigger arm!!! Make sense?

I am not saying that all white girls who run with Hip Hop cats are fucking these said Black men. I’m sure there are tons of white girls who are really into Hip Hop, the music, the lyricism, the lifestyle, sure a lot of them live on the upper West Side of Manhattan, or in Beverly Hills, or Coconut Grove (what up Fla?) but they enjoy the music and it has nothing at all to do with that Mandingo thing.

kim bush

In our present society, interracial relationships are normal and accepted, as they should be. People should be able to do whomever they like without judgment. I will say though that white girls in the music industry and in general are taking a few liberties that I’m not okay with. I know this is a throw back but, who in the fuck authorized Britney Spears to cover ” My Prerogative?” Back when that song was knocking, if a white girl was on the receiving end of Bobby’s pelvic thrusts, his ass would have been up a pole faster than Kim Kardashian could say “Bush.”

Yes, yes, yes. White men have been fucking Black women for a million years too but the unique relationships and exceptions between Black men and white women are more clearly defined by racist overtones that exist in our everyday society and are ignored until somebody’s ass gets killed. Remember that crazy ass cop who killed his white pregnant girlfriend in Ohio? When I saw their kid on TV, I remember thinking, “Oh shit, that’s a brother, he’s fucked.” Then I turned the damn channel.

I’m not trying to make an argument of the most oppressed. I mean, I’m sure that not all Asian women are hypersexualized and cold-blooded like the characters played by Lucy Liu, right? Right? I’m sure that not all Black women who have problems with their fathers and other Black men in their lives, can’t appreciate the love, affection and value in a Brother. Right? Right?


honey molasses…
ebony majesty…
chocolate brown sugar…
sweet epiphany…

juice

SNEAKER FIENDS UNITE!

Wednesday, February 13th, 2008

winter fresh

I don’t fucks with too many cats in the sneaker game because some of these dudes is chicks with sticks [ll]. The cats that I do fucks with however is straight up shot callers. That’s why I had to call my homey PaperChasr when I came across these rare NIKE Foamposites at one of my off-road spots on Queens Boulevard in Long Island City. PaperChasr isn’t one of those Hollywood dudes that makes you link with him via voicemail or SMS. When I hit dudes celly he picks up my call…

DP: PaperChaser, what’s good homey? This is Dallas.
PaperChasr: What the deal playboy?
DP: I can’t call it else I might spoil it, but I need your help real quick.
PC: What’s up?
DP: I am in this spot that has them black Foamposites with the neon green soles for a buck.

foam limes

foam limes

PC: Copp them shits if you got it like that. The MSRP on them was $200.
DP: Good looks. How are you mayne?
PC: Chillin’. Got a trailer up for the film plus a blooper reel. Check them out and holla back.
DP: No doubt homey, let’s politic real quick before the month is done. I need your help on tracking down some exclusive joints.
PC: Yeah man, holla at the kid. One.

PaperChasr is producing this flick called ‘Know You Got Sole’. Sneaker fiends unite for this joint. Sneaker collecting crosses all kinds of lines between races and gender. ‘Know You Got Sole’ goes in to document all the diverse voices within the culture. Get into it.

Nerd up for the bloopers and outtakes.

AT & T Wi-Fi Pomme Thai Chai On Tap…

Wednesday, February 13th, 2008

starbeezy

Say that headline fast five times bitches!

Starbucks gets away with a lot of shit being the boutique drug dealer of the overworked and underpaid white collar labor machine, but at some point someone has got to ask who is watching the watcher (yes to LaBELLE ‘Chameleon’ – copp that shit if you can find it).

It’s not enough that I bought the Strawberry frappucino drink the other day and I had to just stop in my tracks and look at the cup like, “Dayummmm! I should’a had a V8.” Lord knows how high my bloodsugar jumped behind that beverage. Diabetes has got to be some crazy kind of hellish circle in Dante’s Inferno because the journey towards it tastes so damn good.

I’m not even getting at your eyeballs this morning to talk about these insulin inspirations called coffee drinks. Starbucks is sinister enough to charge you five bucks and change for the large drinks, but the real illuminati nonsense comes to play in the company they have selected to distribute wireless internets service inside of their bistros. American Telegraph and Telephone, the same multi-national corporation that holds the licenses for legit iPhones will be pumping up the volume when you download your iTunes playlist inside Starbucks stores.

While corporations laud these developments as synergistic movements I shudder at the idea that my spending habits are transmitted via the world wide web everytime I want a hit of that sugar[ll]. AT & T is the same company facing a class action lawsuit for their participation in the illegal wiretapping program of the G DUBBZ administration? So while Apple Computers, Starbucks and AT & T perform an unholy menage a trois over my dollars I wonder how much more of my information is being transmitted. Especially now that Congress has granted telecoms all types of immunity for sharing people’s personal information.

Aww what me worry? I ain’t got no money anyhoo. Just five dollars in my checking account and a hankering for a caramel macchiato.