Archive for March, 2008

WHAT IF…

Thursday, March 6th, 2008

rick james hulk

Cocaine + Gamma Ray serum = one helluva drug.

Crank ‘Dat Green Lean.

“That Ain’t Hip-Hop!”

Thursday, March 6th, 2008

riley

Editor’s note: 40 DAWG describes a real-life moment with a live-action Riley Freeman

I hate Hip-Hop sometimes…

While walking thru this city of ours on my lunch break today I was gonna run up in Dr. Jay’s on 34th to see if I could come up on some “hood staples” on sale in their sneaker dept (I did – some Barkleys and some AF1’s for a buck). I’m about 100 feet from the store listening to my iPhone and all of a sudden something is thrust in front of my face. I proceed to slap the item and the hand and arm holding it down in a natural instinctive fashion. Dude proceeds to have a mild attitude and then reassesses when I glare back at his monkey ass. His “Street Team” comes over to his aid and now that he has numbers I’m asked the requisite

“What the fuck yo? We just out here tryna grind yo!”

To which I respond,

“And your man fucked up by jamming something in my face.”

So this little dibby-dibby army of four packs in closer together forming what they thought was a “wall” and I’m like,

“So you mad now? If you gonna move, then move if not step the fuck off…”

They didn’t wanna move, but wasn’t gonna do nothing so I proceeded to part their little crowd like Moses. One finally chirps up,

“Thats fucked up yo, that ain’t hip-hop yo! Support real hip-hop!!!”

I chucked them the bird, turned around and proceeded on my way…

I hate Hip-Hop sometimes…

Let Me Clear My Throat by MAXINE

Thursday, March 6th, 2008

yeller

Editor’s note: The new name for domestic violence is Intimate Partner Abuse. Get familiar bitches.

I was going to write about this crazy drama that happened in my building parking lot last week, a la Amadeo’s experience, and it would have been a good story. It involved three homeless people, their shopping cart, a six floor balcony and my regular’s BMW and then, to quote CeezDiem, “I saw this motherfucking video.”

Now let us all get up on our Hip Hop and R&B high horses about Ashanti’s singing, the song’s production, the money laundering, the fucking for tracks, about how this wack ass music isn’t even on our level, yada yadda ya. The point is that this music video is going to be, if it hasn’t already been, seen by millions of people. Premiering on BET last week and running in heavy rotation this week, it’s clear that Ashanti isn’t going to sell any records but everybody’s going to see her damn video. We all know the motto:

Sex: If you’ll splay it, we’ll play it!

I love music. I will listen to most anything at least three times before I make a decision. I have a CRAZY music library made up of everything from Suzanne Vega to DJ Khaled. Yes, even DJ Khaled. I know what you are thinking, but I’m always down for a party record. Trust me, I’m not banging it on the regular. Oh, and pause to banging Khaled on my regular.

What’s frustrating is that the people at BET will have us believe that the programming on that channel reflects the entertainment needs and standards of the Black community in a culturally relevant and sensitive way. In honor of MY favorite show, Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit!!!

Apparently this video is a not so loose spin-off of the Oxygen channel’s ‘Snapped.’ Have you ever seen that show? Basically it’s real life crime analysis from friends, reporters detectives and the like, of women and cases where they went bat shit and fucked somebody up. You know, a woman scorned type shit. The lady who ran her husband over with her Mercedes and then backed up and did it again a few times, remember her? They featured her on the show, to give you an example of these brawlic bitches.

Maybe I was busy when I glanced at the video for the first time, I already knew the concept, but it took my second viewing before I realized that the direction of the video was not to create the illusion that Ashanti had killed her cheating lover, but to remove all doubt. She stabbed him with a knife from the kitchen they shared. They show dude in the bathtub, a presumed dead body, a 911 call, complete with grainy mugshot footage, rushed and hurried court scenes and the raw and emotional agony at the loss of life at the hands of a loved one.

Cut to Ashanti breathing hard in a bathtub with perfectly applied eye shadow. Wait! It’s only entertainment.

This is not the first time Ashanti has dabbled in the intricacies of domestic violence (you may remember “Rain on Me”) but it is certainly the more graphic of the two. What the fuck is wrong with people? Ashanti just don’t know. Cheating, jilted, and delusional spouses exist in our
communities, on our blocks, in the next house over.

In January of 2007 in a small town on the East Coast, months after they separated, this man fatally shot his wife. Four times in the chest, point blank with a .357 Magnum. It was reported that this man thought his wife was cheating on him while they were still together; town lore is that the marriage was over for years, “just neither of them knew it…” Allegedly this man went around this small town on the East Coast in 2007 the weekend before the murder telling people that his wife only had 48 hours to live. No one believed him though.

As the story goes, on that fateful day in January, the man shot his wife, four times in the chest, point blank with a .357 Magnum. Turns out this woman had children, four of them and three grandchildren. The woman’s teenage son was at home from school sick that day and he arrived at the house where the murder occurred, his grandmother’s house. There he saw the yellow Police ape, his mother’s car doors opened, detectives swirling about, he was taken to the hospital and told nothing. Family members were called, prayers were said.

“Hi. Are you okay? I just wanted to let you know that I am praying to God and asking Him to intervene and make a way…”

“Don’t worry,” people said to the woman’s family. “She’s going to be okay.”

But it wasn’t okay and it never would be again, because she was gone. Gone. She was killed by her husband of 24 years, father to her four children and Grandfather to her three grandchildren. He shot her four times in the chest, point blank with a .357 Magnum in a small town on the East Coast in January 0f 2007.

Maybe we should thank Ashanti for her crafty, creative, innovative way of showing true life. Let’s encourage artists to continue to speak on these very real experiences. It’s working!!!

Are you not entertained?

Are you not entertained?!

Isn’t that why you are here!?!

DOLLAR, DOLLAR BILL Y’ALL…

Wednesday, March 5th, 2008

linkin

Editor’s note: With the cRap Music Fantasy league stuck in a stalemate this fiscal quarter, El Gringo Colombiano antes up his $.02 to save the US economy from itself.

In reading Paul Craig Roberts’ article ‘Obama & Global Trade‘, I came across the best idea I ever heard in balancing the US Trade Deficit, from a 2003 essay by Warren Buffet, which highlights Buffet’s idea of Import Certificates.

You see the United States has been in a trade deficit since 1971, with over $100 billion annual deficits in most years since 1984. Not surprisingly, G Dubbz has made the situation 2x worse, with the then record deficit of $379 billion in 2000 mushrooming to upwards of $700B in each of the last three years.

Some smart-dumb economists say a perpetual trade deficit is good. But I never got that memo along with some economists and non-economists with COMMON SENSE who also share my view. How can any economic entity be operating at a loss for 37 consecutive years?!

An individual, or family cannot operate at a loss for more than a few years without wiping out their savings, going deep in debt, and subsequently being forced to declare bankruptcy.

Even in the info-tech, dot-com boom (circa 1996) startup companies could not operate at a loss for more than say 5 years without going bankrupt, or being acquired by a competitor for a deep discount.

Fortune 500 companies can’t lose money for more than a few quarters without massive layoffs and CEO/mgmt team firings.

Even soverign countries, like Argentina, are never allowed to do this. The US gets away with it, since the US dollar is the global favorite reserve currency of our main exporters, such as China and the Arab Oil exporters like Saudi Arabia.

I would like the smart-dumb economists who favor these perpetual deficits to point out ANY example of ANY economic entity (person, company, or country) that operated at a loss for 37 consecutive years, in ALL OF WORLD HISTORY. I doubt it’s ever happened!

Eventually, the US will have to do one(1) or more of the following problematic actions to balance the trade deficit…

  • 1. Use tariffs to make the US a primarily domestic economy
    Problem: The government has to pick & choose which products and, or industries to protect. The way the US political system in recent years has been dominated by special interests, there’s the likely chance this process will be corrupt and far from optimal for the US economy.
  • 2. Pick a few cutting edge high-tech industries, such as genomics, green energy equipment, nanotechnology, etc, that the US might try to be a global export leader in and subsidize those industries heavily in the hopes that these exports will balance out the imports
    Problem: It may be impossible to create enough exports from a few such industries, because the labor cost advantage of ChIndia. Plus ChIndia’s increasing ability to innovate in high-tech markets by itself.
  • 3. Deflate the US Dollar to make US exports more competitive and US imports more costly
    Problem: Duhh! The obvious! This will cause serious inflation and will become an overt tax on most US Citizens, since most of us US citizens’ assets are 100% invested in dollar related assets such as a home, US stocks, & USD’s themselves in Certificates of Deposits, money market accounts and plain ol’ passbook savings accounts. Personally, I don’t want my dollars to be worth say .5 as much 5 years from now since they have already become significantly weaker during the G Dubbz regime.
  • IMHO, Buffet’s idea of Import Certificates is superior to these actions and any other idea I’ve heard thus far. The gist of Import Certificates goes like this…

  • 1. To import “stuff” (goods or services) in the US, you need to buy an Import Certificate
  • 2. Import Certificates will be limited to the amount of exports, hence balancing the US trade deficit
  • 3. US Exporters will be given Import Certificates equal to the amount of stuff they export, which they can sell in a liquid financial market like stocks
  • The effect will be that US Exporters will be encouraged and US Importers will be discouraged.

    Import Certificates will work like a tariff, however the “invisible hand of the free market” will decide which “stuff” gets tariffs.

    Which jobs will come back to the US? Clothing manufacturing or software engineering? The Fed Gov’t will not decide it, but the market will, based on the marginal utility of having to pay X% of the cost of their stuff for Import Certificates.

    I think one immediate effect of this policy will be to help the rural American economy. I also imagine that US corporations won’t offshore the call center to India because they can’t afford the Import Certificates. Yet on the other hand they can’t afford the labor cost of an Atlanta or a Dallas. Their solution: Put their customer service center in the economically devastated Flint, Michigan.

    I really hope Barack Obama gets elected and brings in Buffet as Treasury Secretary to implement the Import Certificate policy.
    -EGC

    POLITRICKS 2008: Don’t Call It A Comeback…

    Wednesday, March 5th, 2008

    oballary

    How long is America going to stand by while this BARACK OBAAMA beats up on HILLARY CLINTON? I’ve been half expecting her to yell out “Rape!” in her desperation for delegates.

    Watching ’60 Minutes’ the other evening disgusted me. Do you realize some people think that come November they will have a choice between OBAAMA, McCAIN and CLINTON!?!

    That is all.

    Carry on.