Archive for October, 2008

NYC TO NETS: NYET YET!

Wednesday, October 15th, 2008

nets logo

Brooklyn Arena Plagued By Poor Economy

I have been shitting on the Nets purported move to Brooklyn from day one. It’s a horrible effing idea. First of all, the Devils just moved into a brand new building in Newark. That town could use whatever help it gets from a corporate entity like the NBA coming into a building already occupied by the NHL. Keep in mind that sports teams only use these facilities for a fraction of ther year. It makes way more fiscal sense to operate a facility with two sports franchises helping to pay the light bill. Why do you think the Meadowlands has show record profits from Giants Stadium since the Jets moved in alongside them?

The second question becomes what we do with the void in space that we have by not installing an arena? My answer is on some economic evolutionary shit. Are y’all ready? Heads ain’t ready.

Affordable Living Space

I’m not talking about market rate apartments either. Sheeeeeeeit, I’m not talking about apartments at all. What Brooklyn needs is affordable living space so that people can take their home offices OUT of their homes. This will increase people’s quality of life when they have to get out of their apartments to go someplace where they have a mini-office or at least a cubicle. This will benefit all the graphic designers and journalists and shut-ins that never leave Bed-Stuy, Bushwick, Williamsburg or wherever. Get out of the fucking house and go to an office. There can be communal conference rooms for people to have business meetings and there should also be several water coolers per floor.

BRUCE RATNER can expand on the MetroTech plan by offering this affordable living space to non-profits and small business incubators. I call the offices “living spaces” becasue of the time that we all spend at our respective places of employment and such. Typically we are there from 8-10 hours and we are awake and active. making dinner plans, reading blogs, talking on the phone with creditors. I live in my fucking office. My co-op apartment is just a sneaker warehouse that I sleep in from time to time. The idea of getting people out of their homes to work is so that people don’t have to take their work home with them. Let the place we lay our heads be some kind of sanctuary for our souls.

With all the doom and gloom being forecasted in the U.S. economy I predict that most of us will have to work until we die. Why can’t we work smarter instead of harder. I think a communal office setting will also lead to an increase in productivity. Mainly though, I don’t want the sucky azz Nets occupying prime Brooklyn real estate.

“What’s the deal with the Nets yo?
Playing in the East ain’t enough for ’em
Two Carters, I thought they get better
Now they getting rid of Kidd, like a miscarraige”

-Wale

CAPTAIN BILLY SUNDAY’s PIRATE RADIO PODCAST

Wednesday, October 15th, 2008

the carlton

What if I told you that my middle name was CARLTON?

Well, it is.

And I’m not ashamed either to wear my penny loafers with argyle socks.


Fall Back Autumn, We Got This

herb alpert

He’s Got 99 Problems…

Wednesday, October 15th, 2008

jay

But a bitch ain’t one of ’em. Hmmmmmm?

I don’t care how hardbody you keep your shit at some point you are gonna have issues with your bitch. It just be like that sometimes. You could be the greatest rapper of all time and you will still have to deal with the bullshit that these broads manifest.

Mahogany

So even if the god MC has to put up with these chicks what makes you think that any lesser rapper won’t have to get put through the ringer? The best of the best get broken down by these scandalous chicks. Look at your man G Rap. He got Karinne Steffans pregnant. You see what that got him? Kool G Rap can’t get a motherfucker to listen to his lisp. Meanwhile Superhead is a rap music superstar without spitting one serious bar. Plus Superhead doesn’t spit, she swallows.Zing!I’ll be here all week internets.

NaS stays having issues with his baby boos because that is the lifestyle of a don. I remember hearing a radio interview with the little homey several years ago and he didn’t even sweat the fact his ex-bitch was getting all scandalous in the newsprint. NaS took it in stride like this was what happens in Holly’hood. Everybody passes around their broads and its nothing. NaS was going through the heartbreak of just losing his mother so I don’t think any trifling heifer could rattle his cage. Not like your boy Eminem got broken down.

I feel for Eminem because that dude loved his baby momma ridiculous. She must have been tongue kissing his asscrack as hard as she smoked the crackpipe because Em was sprung. He’s considered suicide over that chick several times as well as getting arrested and all sorts of property damage from him just wilding out in his mansion. Eminem was clearly one of the greatest rappers to ever touch the microphone, unfortunately, a bitch was definitely his problem.

I can’t say that a bitch was ever Fifty Cent’s problem. He has pretty much held his baby momma in check. There was that time she jumped up out of pocket and hired that dude Raoul Felder, but that didn’t net her too much paper. That is why homegirl burnt down Fifty’s crib on some Left Eye bullshit. Fifty stays winning though because he is transitioning himself to be a media magnate while homegirl is about to get Section 8.

Diddy stays having chick problems. Cassie, Siena Miller, Aubry O’Day, Kim Porter, Mysa. The list goes on for Diddy. If Diddy has 99 problems that means he has 99 bitches. T.I. got chick problems. Cop ass police ass man titty ass Rick Ross has bitch problems since he fucks with Foxy Brown. Even Busta Rhymes has bitch problems and everyone knows he’s teh ghey. KanYe ain’t got no girlfriend but he still has bitch problems. Which brings me to my final question…

Why don’t Jay-Z have any bitch problems?

Is his G just that melliferous? Is Jay-Z the greatest mack in our lifetime? Even Sinatra had problems with these whores. Even J.F.K. I’m not trying to bring down the House of Roc-A-Wear, er, Dereon, but I don’t never hear a peep from them. Jay-Z needs to smack the shit out of BeYonce before the end of this quarter just to remind her of who he is. I know BeYonce has to be getting all uppity now that she is using skin bleaching cremes and the what not. Jay-Z needs to remind that chick that she is still Blacker than Obama no matter how much of that Ambi shit she uses.

POLITRICKS 2008: Whosayin’ Hussein McCain?!?

Wednesday, October 15th, 2008

mcnutz

I knew that the politricks of fear would come out sooner than later. The idea that BARACK OBAAMA is an Arab, therefore he is connected to terrorism is simpleminded even for national political propaganda, but when this notion is repeated ad nauseam it begins to stick on the wall.

Do people need a reason NOT to vote for OBAAMA? Yes, of course they do. Americans always need a reason to justify the shit they know in their craw is bullshit. Who does BARACK HUSSEIN OBAAMA think he is anyway by not changing his family name? Half of America changed their name when they came through Eliis Island. The other half had it changed for them at Goree Island.

What the fuck does a name mean anyhoo? Do you think I would let G Dubbz turn me off to BUSH even though he effed the planet the eff up? I was never into DICK [ll] so that keeps me 100 when we talk about CHENEY. This administration had the possibility of forever ruining the words ‘dick and ‘bush’. There would be no joy left in sex. Shout out to the Reverend CALVIN BUTTS.

We don’t choose our names, but we do choose how we treat the people we come in contact with. We do choose what we want our legacy to stand for. At the end of the day there is nothing valuable in a name if the person holding it is hollow and heartless.

New York State Of Mind…

Tuesday, October 14th, 2008

yank fitted

ROBBIE from UnKut asked me to go in on some tracks he compiled to see which one I thought should be considered the quintessential NYC anthem.

While NaS has crafted some incredible songs paying homage to the City everyone has to bow down to Kool G Rap’s ‘Streets Of New York’. The song is on par with a Monet masterpiece from a musical standpoint.

Don’t just take my word for it (or do), you can listen to all the music that I reviewed for UnKut, and even put in your own vote for the greatest NYC anthem of all time.

The Search For The Ultimate NY Anthem