Archive for the ‘Jig Lit Review’ Category

Primary Concerns Of The AverageBro…

Monday, January 14th, 2008

avbro coldest ice

Editor’s note: We here at DP Dot Com believe in the democratic principles of equal time for any and all presidential campaigns. RON KUCINICH, get at us. With this principle in place I turn my space (no RUPERT MURDOCH MySpace) over to fellow blogger Average Bro for his description on how BARACK OBAAMA plans to represent for issues concerning Black folks. Personally, I’m more impressed with Average Bro’s writing than I am with OBAAMA’s platform. You folks tell me what you think…

Barack, Hillary, Black America, and The White (Wo)Man’s Colder Ice

An often noted criticism, whether in the blogosphere, black talk radio, cable news, or the barbershop, is that some black folks are hesitant to vote for Barack Obama because they don’t feel he’s “addressed specific issues of interest to black people/black women”, and that this is cause for skepticism. I guess I could buy this argument if those very same people could effectively articulate the “issues” that Obama’s competitors have addressed. When you ask this question of those same folks, you either will get Standard Negro Excuse™ #271 (“What’s that got to do with anything? Answer MY question!”) or a meritless defense of another candidate (“Bill Clinton was the first black President anyway.”). Both responses smell like ass to me, especially when it’s so much easier to search for the answers to these questions with a simple Google search, as opposed to being lazy and expecting Obama, or any candidate, to come to your house and explain their stances over DiGiorno Pizza. Not that that would be a bad thing. I love DiGiorno Pizza. Cause, you know, it’s not delivery, it’s DiGiorno.

Just in case you’re interested in what Obama’s done, or is planning on doing for black America, you simply need to visit the thorough but nonthreatening well organized Civil Rights section of the official Obama website. Everything you need to know about the candidate’s stances on issues pertinent to black America is right there, spelled out in layman’s terms for people who need to be spoonfed. I’m not going to bother doing all the legwork for you when all you need to do is click the friggin’ link that follows this post and read for yourself, but here’s a few highlights of Barry’s Plan To Save Black America™. In his words, not mine.

  • GENDER PAY INEQUITY
    For every $1.00 earned by a man, the average woman receives only 77 cents, while African American women only get 67 cents and Latinas receive only 57 cents. Obama will work to overturn the Supreme Court’s recent ruling that curtails racial minorities’ and women’s ability to challenge pay discrimination. Obama will also pass the Fair Pay Act to ensure that women receive equal pay for equal work.
  • HATE CRIMES
    The number of hate crimes increased nearly 8 percent to 7,700 incidents in 2006. Obama will strengthen federal hate crimes legislation and reinvigorate enforcement at the Department of Justice’s Criminal Section.
  • UNEQUAL JUSTICE SYSTEM
    African Americans and Hispanics are more than twice as likely as whites to be searched, arrested, or subdued with force when stopped by police. Disparities in drug sentencing laws, like the differential treatment of crack as opposed to powder cocaine, are unfair. Obama will ban racial profiling by federal law enforcement agencies and provide federal incentives to state and local police departments to prohibit the practice.
  • FIXIN’ UP DA’ HOOD
    Obama will create 20 Promise Neighborhoods in areas that have high levels of poverty and crime and low levels of student academic achievement in cities across the nation. The Promise Neighborhoods will be modeled after the Harlem Children’s Zone, which provides a full network of services, including early childhood education, youth violence prevention efforts and after-school activities, to an entire neighborhood from birth to college.
  • PROMOTING FATHERHOOD
    Obama will sign into law his Responsible Fatherhood and Healthy Families Act to remove some of the government penalties on married families, crack down on men avoiding child support payments, and ensure that payments go to families instead of state bureaucracies.
  • OBAMA’S TRACK RECORD IN ILLINOIS
    Obama has worked to promote civil rights and fairness in the criminal justice system throughout his career. As a community organizer, Obama helped 150,000 African Americans register to vote. As a civil rights lawyer, Obama litigated employment discrimination, housing discrimination, and voting rights cases. As a State Senator, Obama passed one of the country’s first racial profiling law and helped reform a broken death penalty system. And in the U.S. Senate, Obama has been a leading advocate for protecting the right to vote, helping to reauthorize the Voting Rights Act and leading the opposition against discriminatory barriers to voting.
  • THE ACHIEVEMENT GAP
    Obama’s “STEP UP” plan addresses the achievement gap by supporting summer learning opportunities for disadvantaged children through partnerships between local schools and community organizations.
  • PREDATORY LENDING
    The FBI is predicting that mortgage fraud may become a criminal epidemic. In these elaborate schemes, criminals use identity theft or face-to-face scams to gain control of victims’ homes. The offenders then apply for hefty mortgage loans, take the cash, then disappear, robbing homeowners of their property and threatening the financial health of the most vulnerable members of society. Senator Obama introduced the first federal bill to combat mortgage fraud. The STOP FRAUD Act criminalizes mortgage fraud, authorizes $10 million more for anti-mortgage fraud programs and requires the FBI to update bankers on fraudulent activity in a formal, systematic way. The bill also would authorize increased federal funding for mortgage
    counseling.
  • Conspicuously absent, but probably just well hidden: Crime. There was lots of stuff about combating recidivism rates by offering ex-cons more job training, but nothing specifically about reducing murders, etc. Again, I’m sure his stances on this issue are out there, I just couldn’t locate them on his website.

    Either way you dice it, the issues have been well defined. Just because he doesn’t bring them up frequently in debates doesn’t mean he is not concerned with the issues of Black America, and by extension, America.

    Speaking of which, the whole “what’s he gonna do for us?” angle is getting real tired. Let’s not forget, Obama is running for President of the United States, not President of Compton. Black people are barely 12% of the US population nowadays, so expecting him to cater to us and only us is not just delusional, it’s dangerous.

    Black people, perhaps more so than anyone other ethnic group, are notorious for waiting for a Messiah as opposed to rolling up their sleeves and doing some actual work. No President is going to completely solve black on black crime, just as no President can solve the issues of black student underachievement, the disappearing black nuclear family, or out of wedlock births. Our problems are just that. Ours. We didn’t create all of them, but it’s counterproductive to expect someone, anyone, else to fix them.

    [Author’s Note: AvBro.com advocates working with kids in whatever capacity you find most comfortable; be it coaching, mentoring or tutoring, because I think most adults, and for that matter, teens, are already effed’ the eff’ up and thus a lost cause. If a person doesn’t have it figured out by age 18, chances are they’re doomed to a life of idiocy. Getting BET off the air, or outlawing rap music won’t fix any of that. Simply put, if you’re not doing something, anything, to directly improve your community, then please, have a Coke and a smile, and you know the rest. Man up, woman up, and help someone other than yourself! Take the AverageBro Challenge™, or do us all a favor and H.S.D.!!!]

    What angers me is the slave-like mentality with which some black people judge Obama. While it’s fair to expect a black man to bring a different sensibility to the Oval office, I think it’s borderline self-hate to question his dedication to certain issues when you wouldn’t ask the same of the other candidates. This, to me, is the embodiment of “the white man’s ice being colder”.

    [Author’s Note: Yeah, I know dry ice is technically colder than regular ice, but don’t let semantics get in the way of my point.]

    Nobody is saying you should vote for Obama “just cause’ he’s black”. That’s the definition of idiocy. But equally idiotic is not voting for him “just cause’ he’s black” without bothering to know what he advocates and pretending he doesn’t have any official stance just because you haven’t heard a 10 second soundbite on your local news. Wake up, and stop depending on barbershop word of mouth to educate you on everything!

    I’m all for being an informed voter, thus the crapload of links that follow. But if you’re going to be lazy and not do the very basic research to inform yourself about each candidate and what they stand for, yet for some reason think it’s ok to expect more of one candidate than others, then you my friend are just downright triflin’. Please do as all a favor on November 4th and stay your dumb ass at home playing PS3 and watching Judge Mathis. I don’t need your dumb vote cancelling out mine.

    Shit, where are poll taxes and literacy tests when you really need em’!!?!? Damned Jim Crow Laws!!!!

    I’ll step off my box of Lever 2000, but if you’re still unsure of where each candidate stands, please take 10 minutes to peruse their sites and get familiar. But please, whatever you do, don’t pretend that candidates haven’t directly addressed issues of interest to Black America. They all have.

    Just because you haven’t heard about it, doesn’t mean it hasn’t been said.

    Question: Have you heard other people using this “he ain’t said nothin’ ’bout helpin’ black folks” line of reasoning for not supporting Obama? How do you typically respond to this slave mentality?

    Barack Obama’s Issues Section on BarackObama.com

    Hillary’s Clinton’s Issues Section on HillaryClinton.com

    John Edwards Issues Section on JohnEdwards.com

    KEEP IT MOVIN’…

    Thursday, January 10th, 2008

    k.i.m.

    You can’t handle the truth on the regulack at XXL Mag Dot Com.

    I was instructed by my boss’ boss to not go in on the Elliott Wilson situation, but since I exist at this site tenuously anyhoo I thought I would say something for the record. And Since rap records’ sales figures are in the shitter prah’lee no one will buy this drop by the time I’m done.

    Keep it moving XXL mag dot commenters.

    It’s just that simple. What the fuck do you care why Elliot Wilson isn’t here any longer? There’s no conspiracy. Sonn-dula just ain’t here. So what now? Are you gonna stop listening to rap music? Are you going to stop reading publications that talk about rappers? What in your life gets improved when you know where and why Elliott is?

    That’s ho shit you are worried about. Don’t worry about Elliott. That nigga is doing better than all of us. Combined. I’ve got a column at XXL mag dot com and my ass is still eating tuna out of the can. Not even albacore sonn. Dark meat tuna. My cable got shut off over the weekend. I watched football at the Circuit City on Atlantic and Flatbush Avenues. I’m typing this shit from the public library at Grand Army Plaza. Meanwhile E Dubbz lives in a billion dollar penthouse condominium with Jay-Z and Common as neighbors.

    Elliott Wilson is gon’ be aiight. First off, he’s lightskin and figures show that good hair negroes live life on the sweet side of the street. So you know he left Harris Publications with his dignity. Good hair jigs like Elliott and Keith Clinkscales always stay crispy. Not so much speaking of Vibe magazine, but have you seen E Dubb’s wife? How the hell did he bag that? He ain’t even a pretty lightskin nigga either. Sonn has hell’s game I guess so wherever he goes his shit is gon’ be aiight. XXL mag and this online bastard child will be fine too. So while all you ho ass niggas speculate on the whys and the wherefores you need to keep your shit moving as well.

    If you work at Mickey Dee’s this is the year you get promoted to fries up from bathroom cleaning duties. If you already work on fries you have reached the ceiling for growth and you should move on up to Boston Market or some shit. Shouts to all of y’all in school now getting a degree in some shit that will keep you in debt until you are 34yrs old. What up to all the XXL dot commenters at their jobs now reading this shit. I’m just like y’all and when I get back home I am gonna take me some drugs and sip me some wine.

    Elliott Wilson is gon’ be aiight. The rest of us? Not so much.

    THE WRITER’s GUILD STRIKES OUT…

    Monday, January 7th, 2008

    wgae hat

    My Writer’s Guild cap = virtually worthless…

    For most intensive purposes the Writer’s Guild strike has been a striking failure. The daily fake news shows and late night talk shows will be aired live again starting today before the striking writers have reached any agreements with the production studios.

    This sucks on so many levels I can’t even begin to count them. Firstly, trade unions are reeling nationwide because their membership no longer cares about the next generation of tradesmen that will inherit these unions in the future.

    Surely there was a lack of credible union leadership being expressed from the Writer’s Guild management but at the end of the day these tradesmen needed to take a stand for themselves and their rights. Evidently the wealth inside of the WGA membership has turned these men into mice.

    I will continue to forge ahead with content and information created directly for the internets, but I am reminded that if I ever receive the opportunity to expand my platform it will be under the provisions outside of my control. The writers have ceded their intellectual property over to the studios for rebroadcast on any platform the studios choose.

    Residuals have paid many mortgages to homes that people would otherwise not be able to afford and put many a kid through an expensive college that they probably didn’t deserve to go to either. I normally champion the cause that refutes privilege and dismantles the status quo. The only reason these writers deserved to win this fight was not because they are a noble courageous lot, which they are not, but because the studios already have more money than they know what to do with.

    Ol’ Man River by MAXINE

    Monday, December 31st, 2007

    ol man river

    Editor’s note: MAXINE sums up learning, loving and life

    Dere’s an ol’ man called de Mississippi,
    Dat’s de ol’ man dat I’d like to be, (Ol Man River-Showboat 1927)

    Like a moth to a flame burned by the fire, the things that can kill us are what turn us on the most. So bad but so good at the same time. It’s like listening to a Michael Jackson song while awaiting the verdict in his 2005 child molestation case. If he’s ‘guilty’, oh the drama that would ensue! If he’s ‘not guilty’ even more drama would ensue! See, like the Mississippi River, we just keep rolling along, propelled by something akin to desire and ecstasy. ‘Butterflies’ plays in the background…

    “I caress you, let you taste us, just so blissful listen
    I would give you anything baby, just make my dreams come true
    Oh baby you give me butterflies inside”

    In that moment, that 1:45 seconds, his falsetto takes me so high, higher than any allegations, rumors, or opinions from others, to a place meant for the indulgence of love, truth and passion. The song ends, the glassy-eyed sentiment is over, and I think to myself, “did an alleged child molester just tell my story better than it’s ever been told?”

    He mus’ know sumpin’,
    But don’ say nothin’;

    Whenever I’m in Brooklyn, I hit up one particular store for apples. The problem is that this supermarket has shitty produce stock. The apples always taste like there’s a waxy Carmex film. No amount of washing can ever dissolve all of the strange wax, a simple solution is to a)not buy apples from this particular store or b)not eat the apples. No no no. Attraction is a powerful thing. I guarantee the one day I decide not to purchase apples from this store’s shitty produce stock is the one day the waxy film
    disappears, and then what?! All those days of waxy red apple tasting will be for naught? Those who know won’t tell and those who’ll tell don’t know.

    What does he care if de world’s got troubles?
    What does he care if de land ain’t free?

    Keep on movin, keep on movin, don’t stop no. Remember that old Soul 2 Soul song? That ‘s what we do, we keep going, no matter the troubles, not matter the slavery, the price of the land that is ours to begin with. We keep going. The mental slavery is one from which there is no emancipation. As the years pass us by, we reflect on things we’ve loved, lost and learned from, but where is the change? Our world is only as wide as we allow it to be. I see you nodding your head to the newest Weezy F track. I saw you clapping your hands to that “Ay Bay Bay” joint. Throw on some of that old R.Kelly and see how many pairs of panties you can catch. None but ourselves can free our minds. Desire and ecstasy.

    You an’ me, we sweat an’ strain,
    Body all achin’ and racked with pain.

    We try though. Yes we do try. We like the process of trying. We like to create more fuel for the addiction. The rush. The panic at failing. The fear of flying, being, wanting. The Chilli Peppers aren’t the only cats who like pleasure spiked with pain. What’s your aeroplane? We push, pull and plead for the change. The change to what? How do we change something we
    don’t understand? But we like to try. The trying shows that we are aware, the blood, sweat and tears show the pain, and the pain is the proof. The proof that this isn’t all there is, there is more than us. More than we are. But who are we? We have been conditioned to be programmed by fear, the fear of changing or being better. The fear fuels the addiction, the pain is the proof in trying. We eliminate that which slows us down. How can we eliminate ourselves?

    Git a little drunk,
    An’ you lands in jail!

    Lisa Fischer once asked, “How can I ease the pain?” At some points in the song she almost whispers the words, other times her vocals are so scintillating and powerful that I find myself straining to answer her question. How? Those things that can kill us are what turn us on the most. Ease the pain, not make it go away, ease it. Make it more necessary. See, we like things that hurt, just enough for us to feel them. A little mixed with a lot is a deadly combination. All of a sudden there is no stopping, the inertia of the mind takes over, our desires and ecstasy wait for us at the bottom and we run toward it, full force.

    Ah’m tired o’ livin’,
    And skeered o’ dyin’

    We are never tired. Never tired of the struggle, the hustle. Addiction needs fuel, and we are addicted…to the life. Addicted to the love, to the truth, to the understanding. We tire from the process but oh, how we love it! Nothing more than to be martyr of ourselves. Who wouldn’t sacrifice themselves for themselves? A better being. Dying is part of the process but not really. People who jump out of planes always wear parachutes. We just want to get taken to the brink, the brink of no return, only to save ourselves by pulling the cord. It can be like sex. Daring, reckless, dangerous, warm, beautiful, necessary. Fuck that suede headboard, silk scarves, and strawberries and shit. Pure, unadulturated, sweaty, grimy sex. Ah, the things that turn us on the most right? Then he wakes up in the morning and goes home to his wife.

    But Ol’ Man River,
    He jes’ keeps rollin’ along!

    We go on, we continue, we move, we love, we grow, we…are. Everything we want to be, and more. We take from ourselves, from the world, from each other, and we flow. Like honey, slowly and sweetly. When things get sticky, well, we enjoy it and use the setback as a lubricant for things not so easily achievable. Because the harder things always come. We like it, we find our strength in the understanding of the unknown. Like a moth to a flame burned by the fire, my love is blind can’t you see my desire?

    24…

    Sunday, December 23rd, 2007

    24

    XXL magazine’s big boss ELLIOTT WILSON created 24 drops in the span of 24 hours (actually he went 25 for 25).

    Dude just officially became an iNternets Celebrity.