Archive for the ‘Jig Lit Review’ Category

Feeding Us Bread And Circuses…

Tuesday, March 13th, 2007

lion hoopz

This is the part of our show where we take a look at the daily news on the internets. I just paid my cable bill so I am going to make a note to watch some television this week. My expenses to CableVision amount to $150 a month for essentially my broadband connection since I rarely turn on the boob tube and I never pick up my home phone. Fucking CableVision is subsidizing the lackluster Knicks with my paycheck. Bitches.

Who amongst us gives a fuck that White Castle has removed the nutritional information from their stores in NYC? Who the fuck reads the nutritional info in White Castles?!? I could eat a fucking salad from McDonald’s for a month straight and my ass would still gain weight. The blue cheese salad dressing alone has enough calories to fuel a racehorse. Don’t fuck around and put that chicken on your shit and then sprinkle that bacon… Bitch please, the reason I eat at McDonald’s is so that my azz can be dead at forty. I am going to the other side with B.I.G. and ‘Pac. The buffet in hell has all you can eat Maine lobster tails.

Joint Chiefs of Staff General PETER PACE does not care about gays in the military. Actually, he does care enough to call fag soldiers immoral and relate them to adulterers. Sounds like the General is one of those dudes that dreams about his Jesus as a gat-busting redeemer who sends Philistines to hell with the business end of a shotgun. The army has problems with recruiting people no? So if a whole bunch of fearless fags sign up and get blown to bits that means theres less fags right? Shouldn’t the General like that outcome, or is he secretly a fan of all of those makeover reality shows? Two men loving each other is immoral, but killing people wholesale with shells of depleted uranium and white phosphorus… Not so much.

Apparently that gay shit has been what’s up in the military since the Greeks got into it hardbody. The new movie ‘300’ is breaking all sorts of box office records and the critics are flying around like monkeys with a hand full of poop. Iranians, who’s cultural radar stays the on pissed off setting, are upset because of the fictional depictions of Persians. Do any of you remember back in the early 80’s when it was bad to be from Iran or Iraq so all these folks called themselves ‘Persians’? I had a Geometry tutor in juniour high school and she was so beautiful. I dreamed of marrying her because her name was DALIA. She told me she was from Persia. I thought that shit was in Portugal. We lost contact after my school semester ended. That bitch was fine for an arab ho, but I digress…

If you go see the movie ‘300’ and you really ingest the allegory being told then what you will understand is that eventually the invading, occupying force that was led by a king who claimed that he was connected to GOD was defeated by the a smaller army of soldiers with less technological weapons. They used their own bravery and their knowledge of the land on which they were fighting to finally prevail against the invaders. That’s the core lesson inside of ‘300’ and if anyone tells you anything else then they can’t see the forest for the trees. What an idiot might see as a story about Greece and Persia is really the story about how honor triumphs over greed. How the stupidity and lusty ambitions of a leader who isn’t a warrior will eventually lead to his empire’s downfall. Free your mind party people.

How ironic is it that we can look at RICHARD NIXON now and say that he was a more honest and trustworthy president than we have had since? The BUSH Administration runs over our civil liberties like an uncontrollable elephant. A Vice-President that divulged secrets like intelligence operatives would never have been allowed in America’s golden era. Loose lips sink ships was more than propaganda then. It was a way of life that spoke of honor and fidelity to one’s country. When a country’s foreign policy is dictated to them from the boardroom of a multi-global conglomerate like Halliburton you should all know that honor and justice are only ideals now. If you want to see them being worn you’ll have to put them on a t-shirt.

It’s just bread and circuses for us now party people…

ringmaster

ELEKTRA IS DEAD…

Monday, March 12th, 2007

dd

Here’s a quick little drop for the nerdcore contingent over here at DP Dot Com…

FRANK MILLER gives a great interview filled with his insight on creating stories and characters.

COMBAT JACK will argue that the Elektra saga in Daredevil was greater than the Phoenix storyline. He’d be wrong, although Elektra’s death at the hands of Bullseye was the most hardbody shit I ever saw in a comic book. Word to H.R. GEIGER.

elektras dead

HIP-HOP (And Black America) NEED A TRIPLE BYPASS…

Monday, March 5th, 2007

bypass

Editor’s note: Our big homey 40 DIESEL is blessing us with another one of his thought provoking and heartfelt drops. This joint is so good that I’m a little embarrassed because my grind here hasn’t been as profound. Well, that’s not entirely true either, but this is a damn good drop. I may need to post a picture of 40 on the DP dot com contributor’s page. I know just the one too…

Last week ByronCrawford dot com dropped a link from MSNBC about the current demise of cRap music in regards to his 21% drop in commercial viability. The article offered up many other points of why many are becoming tuned out to the music one of the topics being the oft-beaten dead horse of cRap music imagery. While reading a popular rap message board I realized how many of the people out there dismissed this has “hating” and threw out the knee jerk “Uncle Tom” and “Coon” to these black critics of the music. Furthermore, I came across the following rant from rap nemesis and classical Negroe extraordinaire Wynton Marsalis. Wynton hates rap music (ironically his brother loves it), so his scathing retorts in the article are more than biased however…

Where as I don’t agree with all of Marsalis’ statements if you don’t see some truth in his statements than you are lying to yourself. Also, I need to take issue with the notion that hating hip-hop as a black man is some sort of “self-hatred”. The sloppy group think that has plagued black people in this country for decades has done a great disservice to the collective “blackness” and as the only real form of “unity” that we seem to exhibit has often had negative effects such as Democrats taking the black vote for granted, those mentally enslaved by the corruption of the Black Church, the foolish notion that smartness is “selling out”, and other gross fallacies that have fostered and perpetuating ignorance amongst ourselves and the reflection of a people as we attempt to move in this multi-cultural society that were are a part of whether we like it or not. We stand at the crossroads with a black presidential candidate and the only Negroe responses in the mass media wonders if “Obama is black enough” and that Negroes love Hillary because of Bubba “who many African-Americans effectionately call ‘the first Black President'”. I mean that long running inside joke has made it to ABC News Tonight as a statement of fact to buttress Hillary’s standing? Pardon me while I’m starting to openly laugh myself to tears at our media portrayal. The crab barrel has gotten arguably more shallow yet the activity continues to increase…

This leads me to say that why when a black man has some sort of critique for some other black man its labeled as “selling out” or miscontrued as a forfiture of blackness? One of the most crippling elements that is retarding the development of black society in America is the overly emotional quality that cannot take criticism. Are we still that intellectually ill-equipped that any mere challenge of thought or concept warrants immediate retalitation rather than intellectual discorse? If this is the only way that people know how handle the most minute diagreement then we have to look at ourselves and wonder where we really stand as a society. Booker T. Washington was the first to articulate the needs for the newly found freed slave to gain entre in to American society, and that begat W.E.B. DuBois who responded in kind to what he felt were the flaws of Washington’s program and created the “other school” of black thought. Whether Martin vs. Malcolm, or even the evoutionary hip-hop leap of Busy Bee vs. Moe Dee.

Some of the biggest advances in thought and ideal were made out of someone critiquing the current status quo and changes were made. Its the nature of evolution. But let me clarify “critique” and “challenge”. Not this urban action music posturing based on faux saber rattling as a last ditch effort for self-promotion. Not martyring victims of their own ignorance who paid the ultimate price to whet the corporate hip-hop “reality” appetite. I’m talking about the engaging of thoughts and ideas that created the Harlem Rennaissance, and the mutli-angled struggle for civil rights….

But alas as I see hip-hop/rap rise from the slums of a burnt out Bronx and become a multi-billion dollar industry, so how we became lax. When did they start printing out the “WE MADE IT” party invitiations because I have yet to have one. It seems we’ve settled for a trifle of “success” just because we dominate media imagery regardless what the image is? Are we protecting ourselves that much that we don’t wanna rock the proverbial boat with the fear we may lose everything? And in our quest to do so we figuratively (and some times literally) assassinate anyone who dare challenge the great world of corporate hip-hop? Well label me traitor then because we still got a long ways to go and and it starts with these artists owning up to these label execs. These dudes gotta stop being the purveyors of this bullsh*t just because some old white in a suit tells them its gonna sell. Its time to own up and man up to what MAINSTREAM rap music has become. Because I don’t wanna hear people crying in 10 years about “What happened” just like black folks seem to be losing in other aspects of our lives in America.

This ain’t about Cosby, Marsalis, Stanley Crouch, or any of them. “Suck my d*ck” and “He’s an old coon” aren’t worthwhile defenses to people who can write essays about why they think you’re wrong. Educate and arm yourself if you wanna correct this and move out of that glass house before you start chuckin’ stones. Its about a generation learning how to be men with out sacrificing our manhood. Malcolm X once said “The Nation of Islam was the greatest organization the black man ever created and n*ggers ruined it.” Sadly that’s becoming hip-hop’s veritable epitath.

Oh yeah, fuck you to them ig’nant ass bamas who think it’s fun to get toddlers blunted… But thats a whole ‘nother story…

Making Little Girls Into Women Is Hard Work…

Friday, February 23rd, 2007

ashanti

Looks like the publishers are using the same art director

There’s a big push from mainstream media to highlight the fact that Hip-Hop music and rap videos are for the most part mysoginistic. Whoop dee fucking doo. For those of us that use our brains to think we understand that AMERICAN culture is mostly mysoginistic, and patriarchal, and homophobic. Blaming rap music as the source for these attitudes is totally disingenuous, but that doesn’t mean that rap music et al doesn’t play it’s own lane as a spoke in the wheel of supremacy.

When FOXY BROWN was arrested this weekend I took a minute to look at the popular Hip-Hop landscape to see what women exist within it as characters and the most prominent character that came to my mind was REMY MA. Do you realize that almost all the women that have come to rap music over the last ten years are essentially all the same person in two dimensions? The fact that background dancers in music videos are a more valuable commodity than female rappers is further proof that the lady emcee is dead. What career path do I have for a young lady with rhyme skills? There’s not even enough room to break into the celebrity filled line up of HU$TLE SIMMONS ‘Def Poetry Jam’.

I place a lot of the responsibility of teaching the youth on women and that has to stop since we are under attack as a community from multiple angles. When I say community I refer to all the people that want to live and raise their families free from the hyper-sexualization, hyper-consumerism, hyper-violence that the mainstream media machines perpetuate. The MSM does it from reality shows, to newspapers, to music CD’s. Even toy companies are conscripted to manufacture dildos for children. So how do we regular folks put a chink in the MSM’s armor? I’m planning a media blackout week for myself beginning after shabbas this weekend. No television, no radio, and even more importantly, no internets. It will be time for me to get back into reading books again.

Speaking of books… I told you about this joint last week for Valentine’s Day and the more I read inside of it the more I am in love with the poetry and the composition of the book. SUPA SISTA did her thing with this project and I beg y’all to give her a look. You won’t be disappointed. Also, she is raising a daughter and son in OUR community. That shit is hard work.
Passion, Pride and Politickin

The Lezzie, The Nazi And The Nigerian…

Thursday, February 22nd, 2007

obama

It’s politricks as usual bitches, but this time it’s for the motherlode. The whole enchilada. The unsurpassable corner office. The transcendant(whoever uses this word after me should kill themself) boss of bosses. Yep, it’s all about the White House. For DP Dot Com’s first installation of the run up until Election 2008 we thought we’d highlight the superstars that have thrown their hats into the ring for office of president of the United States.

This trifecta features the former New York City mayor who is making a last gasp, last grasp at a return to political glory. The lustre on his forehead post-911 is starting to fade and tarnish. Presidential campaigns are nasty affairs so I hope that his son’s public drooling problem has been rectified. There’s also the foxy former first lady who brought sexy back to pantsuits like she was the blonde STEPHANIE ZIMBALIST. Nevermind the fact that she is a reverse carpetbagger from Arkansas, this lady is never hustling backwards. She’s learned the game from one of the slickest Willys to ever throw the dice. Lastly, is the campaign’s true dark horse, although some will say that he still isn’t dark enough. How does a junior Senator leapfrog over a dozen or more well known names. He learns to present himself as “articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.

Fuck all the rhetorical bullshit. I’m a simple American with simple values like life, liberty and internets neutrality. It shouldn’t be too dificult for any of the three scallywag oppurtunists pictured above to be better administrators than the man in office now. Unfortunately, President BUSH has set the bar that low. But I still need to make sure that I am making an informed and responsible choice when I step inside the voting booth. It’s times like these that I really miss not having one of my best resources available for consultation.

OL’ DIRTY BASTARD – R.I.P. RUSSELL JONES

What would Dirt McGirt do in this situation? Lucky for me I have a handy online Wu Tang name generator. The candidate with the most hardbody Wu Tang name is the one that I will cast my vote with. Let’s look at the results…

  • RUDOLPH GIULIANI = Amateur Artist
  • HILLARY CLINTON = Mighty Menace***
  • BARACK OBAMA = Annoyin’ Swami
  • So without any catastrophic changes to her campaign strategy(read: skirts) HILLARY CLINTON will have garnered the votes of the mostly Black Republican staff here at DALLAS PENN DOT COM. Just as well anyhoo for GUILIANI and OBAMA since there hasn’t been a president elected with a vowel sound ending their last name. You could include McKINLEY and KENNEDY if you want, but they both got clapped on, and I’m not talking about applause.