Archive for the ‘T.O.N.Y.’ Category

FREEDOM FRIDAYS Is Like…

Friday, September 29th, 2006

freedom

Being around friends as you dance like a 16yr. old without a care in the world.

Holler at me if you stop by tonight.

TriBeCa Cinemas
54 Varick Street
(one block south of Canal Street)
for more info/RSVP – 212.767.9174

DALLASPENN.COM: It’s Ya’ Birthday! Who The Fuck Cares?!?!?

Thursday, September 28th, 2006

billy sunday

I am in a totally shitty mood right now. On my way home from work I watched the subway conductor dehumanize a disabled passenger by calling him ‘wheelchair’. As opposed to mister or even mister wheelchair. The conductor also argued with another passenger who he instructed to move from the area that was to be occupied by the wheelchair passenger. I guess the conductor was fresh out of niceties for the day because he was steady pissing everyone off.

When I exited the subway I was greeted with the screeching catterwall of some woman arguing with someone while she was on her cell phone. As she cursed the person in a style that is unimitable save for ‘Angry Black Women’, she upset my stomach. It was like the wail of a harpie. Her pitch was so high and shrieking that I begun to lose my balance. If there were any dogs close by I am sure that their ears would have bled.

Finally, inside the relative peace and tranquility that is my apartment and of course there are phone messages to listen to. Unfortunately, none are from family or friends wishing me a happy new year. This new year begins much like years past as I try to figure out a way to escape this mountain of debt and depression. At least I have you good folks. You guys keep me from even considering T.O.’ing up in this bitch. You humps better buy the book when it drops.

Anyhoo, if you want to do something nice for the kid today do me a favor and put some change in the cup of a homeless bum. But for the grace of GOD, there go I.

These YANKEES Aren’t Worth A Hill Of Beans…

Wednesday, September 27th, 2006

beaneaters

The YANKEES are never as bad as the worst teams in baseball. Their payroll is way too expansive to permit that, but sometimes they seem to contain the chemistry that exists on all the bad clubs. They keep up appearances by having marquee players distract you from what is esssentially a group of strangers cobbled from different walks of life. This is the major leagues and I doubt you will ever find a team that has come through the minor leagues together, but these YANKEES are as disparate a group as I have ever seen.

ALEX RODRIGUEZ a/k/a ‘Prom Queen’ will never be the A-ROD from Seattle. JASON GIAMBI is so unimpressive off steroids. RANDY JOHNSON hasn’t killed a single bird in New York. The highlight of DEREK JETER’s career is that at one time he was schtooping MARIAH CAREY. The YANKEES will never fall into the abyss because their owner would gladly ruin the salary structure of the game in order to procure a winning ballclub, but it is refreshing to watch the wheels come off ever so slightly as the METS ascend to NYC prominence.

Say it ain’t so CURT? It seems that losing can take it’s toll on a player physically and mentally. CURT SCHILLING has hinted that he may retire after this season. And I so wanted to see a Boston/METS World Series next year. Cie la vie.

The Devil Made Him Do It…

Sunday, September 24th, 2006

rangel devil

Before I get up in Harlem’s House of Reps CHARLES RANGEL’s azz (no LEVAR BURTON) I just wanted to submit further proof to you that ’80s babies don’t know shit.

jesse

As I was walking through midtown Manhattan to meet up with my ladyfriend for dinner I saw the Honorable Doctor Reverend JESSE JACKSON with a small entourage going into their hotel. I admit to be slightly joyous to see the Reverend and I yelled to him, “Run JESSE, Run!” A huge cheesesmile wrapped around my face when the Reverend turned around and raised his hand. The police officer that was nearest to me told me that she didn’t find my remarks amusing in the least. I asked her how old she was. She replied that it was none of my business and that my statement was in effect a problem. I then told her that I asked her age because what I shouted out was JESSE JACKSON’s campaign slogan in the 1984 presidential primaries. The cop then admitted that she would have only been two years old at the time. Like many people have already said on the site… ’80s babies don’t know shit.

The new buzz about HUGO CHAVEZ is how the mainstream media has taken umbrage to his rant. Inside of the United States, talking truth to power has to be couched inside of a comedy routine or a cartoon. Otherwise people become very uncomfortable. Like I told you people before, supremacy is the inconvenient truth. At some point in the story of humnakind this fact will have to make itself blatant again, but for the time being we aren’t supoosed to speak on the white elephant sitting in our living rooms. With all the BILL O’REILLY slash RUSH LIMBAUGHs that got their faces pushed out of place by CHAVEZ remarks the MSM chose to highlight the rebuke of CHAVEZ from a local New York politrickster.

rangel devil

Talk about a schwartze in a fancy schmatte, CHARLES RANGEL never met a buffet table that he didn’t like and when the White House told him to get his fat ass on the newsreels he hopped right to it. Vintage house nigger status.

“You don’t come into my country, you don’t come into my congressional district, and you don’t condemn my president. If there’s any crticism of President Bush, it should be restricted to Americans – whether we voted for him or not.”

rangel

CHARLES RANGEL needs a ‘HO SIT DOWN!’ for opening his fat mouth. In the over thirty years that RANGEL has been reppin’ Harlem in the U.S. House of Representatives what do the niggers in his Harlem congressional district have to show for his work. The lowest test scores in the state for reading and math. The lowest family net wealth per capita. The only thing that keeps Harlem from being as poor and drug dependent as the South Bronx are all the dogwalkers that were able to buy brownstones when the crack epidemic 1980’s reduced Harlem’s property values to scratch. CHARLES RANGEL was bought and sold even before that so his stake in Harlem is totally superficial.

I blame you uptown niggers for letting this man get fat on your creative and moral equity. It’s time for more of you niggers to switch party affiliations and vote that cracker RANGEL into retirement. Peep the quote attributed to RANGEL in the attached image. Yeah, I agree that the myth of supremacy must be shattered, because it’s NOT a myth. It is real and it goes down on the regulack. The single greatest trick of the devil was convincing people that he didn’t exist. The second greatest trick of the devil was in making people think he was dumb.

rangel bush

FREEDOM FRIDAYS…

Thursday, September 21st, 2006

freedom

NYC’s #1 dance party jumps off again at a movie theater!?!

That’s right party people, FREEDOM FRIDAY is back to give your body and soles the groove that they have been missing. Their new home, TriBeCa Cinemas, is spacious and relaxing. There are two seperate levels for dancing and lounging as well as a movie theater which will play some of your favorite classics from ‘Star Wars’ to ‘The Last Dragon’.

The best part about FREEDOM’s new digs is that the old price points are still in full effect. This means that when you say the name ‘DALLAS PENN‘ to the cashier, ladies will pay only $5 and fellas only have to pony up $7. Doors crack at 10pm and there will be an open vodka bar from 10pm until midnite.

The bigger news than FREEDOM moving is that they are now rolling with politcial pimp KEVIN POWELL. This means that the ladies will be mostly from the ‘Talented Tenth‘ and there may even be a BeYonce or Solange sighting up in that piece. Stay tuned…

TriBeCa Cinemas
54 Varick Street
(one block south of Canal Street)
for more info/RSVP – 212.767.9174