Archive for the ‘Straight Laced’ Category

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Flud’n The Internets With Fresh Shit…

Tuesday, December 8th, 2009

flud

You don’t find too many manufacturers who have success in courting the Hip-Hop demographic who then actually stick around for the long haul. Flud watches has been a different kind of company because their owners ARE actually Hip-Hop and not simply just here to take advantage of the culture for profit.

You can see it in their watch designs that reflect the Technics 1200 turntables or the Panasonic boom boxes. You can feel their Hip-Hop pedigree in the materials they use to craft their timepieces. I’m mad that I slept on their A Tribe Called Quest homage which would have been so sick with the ATCQ Air Jordan 1’s.

Flud watches is here to stay and I’m proud to be down with their movement. They were cool enough to gift a few timepieces to the readers at DP.com and I can’t think of any better website to give these watches to than the folks here who wade through my typos and grammatical mishaps on the daily.

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I want to run this contest a little different than the ones I usually post here. This contest is gonna be about the shit I drop here on this page. If you fux with DP.com hardbody then you will be having a sick wristwatch mailed off to you before the new year. Let’s see who really fux with this website…

  • DP.com has produced several ‘fanboy’ music videos in 2009. List the videos.
  • Name two of the past celebrity ‘guest editors’ who have appeared on the DP.com pages.
  • Name the director of DallasPenn.com and the executive producer.

    • Posted in Fanboy Ish, Fashion Faux Pas, iNternets Celebrities, Straight Laced, Weird Science | 33 Comments »

    The Last Real Rap Nigga Alive…

    Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

    bisd

    ‘So Disrespectful’

    I have to apologize to all the Fisty Scent fans I might have ignored on the release of his latest album. I listened to the album once(but not really). On my repeated listens last night as I navigated through the internets I realized how much I enjoy this album ‘Before I self Destruct’. This is the kind of regressive rap music that my dude from Oz would enjoy. 50 Cent is totally the dumbed down version of Kool G Rap. Except 50 Cent annunciates impeccably. You can hear his threats clearly.

    ‘Before I Self Destruct’ isn’t so much coke rap or brag rap as it is revenge rap. The thing that makes 50 Cent’s blood flow better than motor oil is the idea that he has to exact revenge on people. Everyone. Enemies. Friends. Family. This dude is so disrespectful. I’m trying to figure out who made 50 Cent so angry. It shouldn’t be this hard to happy? Sure people hated 50 a few years ago, he was broke back then. Poor folks remind us of our own mortality. I hate them too.

    ‘Before I Self Destruct’ is at its best when 50 Cent gets personal. This is why he has been such a force in rap for the last several years. No other rapper names names like 50 Cent does. No subliminals or vaguely confusing slicktalk. 50 Cent will say your name. Yes. YOU. He doesn’t like you very much. Honestly, I don’t like you either. ‘Before I Self Destruct’ is the album that all the bum ass rappers are praying we don’t discuss. There isn’t too much manufactured cool on this disk. This is not Sinatra rap.

    This is smack ya’ baby mama in the ovaries music. Enjoy


    ‘Then Day Went By’

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    ‘Crime Wave’

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    ‘Gangsta’s Delight’

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    ‘Do You Think About Me?’

    Posted in Black Bullshit, Blipsters = Hipsters, Crappers, Ghetto Celebs, Hollyweird, Ninjas, Pirate Radio Podcast, Straight Laced, Wig Owners | 16 Comments »

    Celebrate Your Beautiful Blackness Brooklyn…

    Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

    bma wiley

    The Brooklyn Museum of Art hosted Target 1st Saturday party is NYC’s best monthly jam hands down. First off, you are in one of the city’s greatest buildings right in the heart of the county of Kings. This neighborhood, and this city, was brought to its knees during the Crown Heights riots. Everything is not equal or equitable but those fires aren’t burning any longer. Young Black male teenagers are still at risk of dropping out of school and falling through the cracks but if one of those young men comes to the museum and sees himself in the image of regalia maybe he will internalize that memory for the dark days.

    I love these portraits of Black men that Kehinde Wiley has created [ll]. I need to put a boldface on that pause button too since C.S. informed me that the subjects of the paintings may be Wiley’s intimates. I have to ignore that detail to really appreciate the details in these portraits. C.S. tells me that these works further objectify Black males within the larger power structure, but honestly asking, what DOESN’T objectify the Black male? The Black male is what everyone wants to be when they consider the virility of mind, body and spirit. The unconquered lions roam free in the county of Kings. Well, not exactly, but you can get that feeling from viewing some of the Wiley paintings the museum has on permanent display.

    bma wiley

    Make sure you get to the museum early enough to enjoy some of the permanent collection…

    Curator Talk – 7pm
    Kevin Dumouchelle, Interim Assistant Curator of the Arts of Africa and the Pacific Islands, discusses the Museum’s collection of African art. This event is Sign Language interpreted. Free tickets are available at the Visitor Center at 6:30pm

    Music – 7:30–8:30pm
    The award-winning Brooklyn Youth Chorus presents seasonal songs and liturgical music inspired by James Tissot’s The Life of Christ

    First Saturdays Focus Group – 9–9:30pm
    Join us for a discussion of what would bring you back to the museum

    Dance Party – 9–11pm
    Relive warm summer memories and shake it at a hot dance party presented by Brooklyn’s Soul Summit

    You don’t have to come to the Brooklyn Museum of Art in a tuxedo, but if you have a nice piece of vintage Polo Ralph Lauren put it on and show your respect to the style and swagger that young Black teenagers have made popular all around the globe.

    bma wiley

    Posted in 5 Elements, Blipsters = Hipsters, Ghetto Celebs, No Boutros Boutros... Ghali, Straight Laced, T.O.N.Y., When I Reminisce... | 22 Comments »

    DP.com Free Shit: SONNY CHIBA DVDs

    Sunday, November 29th, 2009

    sonny chiba

    You didn’t think I was gonna let the holiday season roll thru DP.com without me blessing the folks that catch my Saturday drops? I have mad respect for those that peep game from their desk jobs, but for those of you that come thru on the strength… I love y’all [ll].

    Let’s give away some Sonny Chiba Samurai series DVDs that I copped from Pathmark. Sonny Chiba might be the greatest martial arts actor of all time. From kung fu movies to 1970s action films to feudal period Japanese joints Sonny Chiba has done them all. Not even the great Bruce Lee has as diverse an ouevre as Chiba.

    I have two(2) copies of ‘Sonny Chiba Samurai’ which is actually a three(3) film disk for the first two people that can tell the name of Christian Slater’s character who was obsessed with Sonny Chiba from the Tarantino action film ‘True Romance’, and the subsequent Tarantino film that Sonny Chiba would later star in.

    It wouldn’t be a holiday season without some DP.com Free Shit.

    Posted in 5 Elements, Fanboy Ish, Hollyweird, Straight Laced, When I Reminisce... | 8 Comments »

    Don’t Get Dropped While Shopping…

    Friday, November 27th, 2009

    doorbusters

    I hope that you don’t end up like homegirl did and since you are fuxing with a computer you shouldn’t. Doorbuster sales are for chumps. Who wants that bullshit anyhoo? If I had my videocamera still in my possession I would have posted up outside of the Wal-Mart where son got merc’ked last year just to see if any of these nimrods learned a lesson in humanity. I doubt it tho’. Brick and mortar shopping is for losers.

    Combat Jack introduced me to the dude who owns this clothing line called 12 BAR. The clothes are dope and the dude was also mad chill. What most of you don’t know is that in real life I’m quite a douche so when homeboy from 12 BAR reached out to me in an effort to put me into his gear I rebuffed him. You see, I’m not some internets whore. I’m actually a slut. Whores do shit for money. I do my shit for love of the game.

    12 BAR dude stays cool with the kid tho’ and he sends me an e-mail that he is having a clearance sale on his gear. I can get 60% off using the promotional code BLACK at the checkout. I don’t fux with promo codes less than 30% off. Do we all understand that 60% off is even greater than ‘HALF OFF’?

    So I go to the 12 BAR website and peep some of the joints they are fuxing with.

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    The sweatshirt in the center is hardbody. Joint has elbow patches too.

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    The tee is the center and the right are FLAMBAY! The one in the center is the Fela Kuti joint. Don’t be retarded 60% off $24 is like $5 bucks. I don’t know math like that, but where on God’s green earth are you gonna score a dope tee for that cheap?

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    I like the all black hoody on the right. What is 60% off of $70?

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    This 60% off sale is what’s up and I have to keep it 100 and say that I slept on the 12 BAR pedigree. Sadly, all the sale shit has sold out of the obese man sizes that I prefer. If I was to wear an XL tee that shit would look like a sports bra on me. At least there is one I.T. they have I know will fit.

    Fitteds.

    I love me some fitted caps.

    Nubuck suede with embroidery?

    Sneaker Fiends Unite!

    Posted in 5 Elements, Fashion Faux Pas, iNternets Celebrities, Straight Laced | 3 Comments »

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