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Editor’s note: With the help of the Oh Word designed OHHLA database, 40 Dawg submits the lyrics from what is arguably the greatest rap song in the history of microphone recordings.

Rock The Bells (1986)

Rumor has it that you’re tired of my scratchin’ and drums
And of couse I wanna expand to the maximum
So I inject in one more element to that of L.L.
Came up with something’ funky called Rock the Bells
During this episode vocally I explode
My title is the king of the FM mode
See, my volume expands to consume
And my structures emote a lyrical heirloom
Vocally pulsating, I initiate gyrating
Ya must respond to my bells, there’s no waiting
For the duration, there’s no articulation
Receiving ovation for the bell association
The vocalization techniques I employ
The voice of my shadow could take a toy boy
The injection of bells into this beat
The result-enough evergy to amputate your feet
Greater insulator microphone dominator
My name is Cool J, manipulator innovator
Connoisseur, I’m sure my percussion will excite
These bells are gonna rock all night
Rock the bells

The bells make your energy escalate
A sort of musical fury L.L. might detonate
Subject matter entitled “The Bells”
The lyrical arrangement is by L.L.
My program strains the tympanic membrane
I’ve been ordained the best believe I’ll flame
Paragraphs I concoct, Cut Creator’s like an organist
Cool J exists as a journalist
I illuminate over any number on the Richter
My throat contracts like a boa constrictor
You’re totally engulfed by the structure and the format
It’s not dormant, it goes to the core, man
As you repain, you’ll say I went
To torture individuals for excitement
Ambassador, the Thane of Cawdor
Dialect so def, it’ll rip up the floor
Ignite and excite with verbal extensions
What I’ll mention will put you on pension
Makin’ you tremble, nothin’ resemble
The bells and if it don’t
I disassemble
hit if you bit
I go have a fit
The master impresario of lyrical wit
A hip-hop creature, concert feature
Amateur teacher, my rhymes reach ya
When I commence with excellence
It eradicates levels of pestilence
Upon a plateau
No mortal can go
Mythological characters stand below
Rock the bells

A B-boy symphony complete with bells
No classical fanatic is parallel
From the design of my lyrics many people call me
An immortalized B-boy prodigy
Eeee a misdemeanor, cleaner women I subpoena
No conjecture in my lecture, name and adversary Gina
Promoter, my tune revolves like rotor
Wild style decoder, the cranium of Yoda
Rehearsing steadily, growing I sing tweeter, mid-range
And woofers need guarding
The bells rip your auditory canal
Plagiarism is suicide for then I shall
Be forced to assault
Our position will halt
Upset you with words
Drink your blood like it’s a malt
Opposite of illusions
Evidently it’s true
The beat metabolism supposed to accelerate you
Hallucinating severe convulsion
Your equilibrium is took from my propolsion
I came here tonight to rock
These bells will never stop
Rock the Bells

Ya livin’ off my lines
Autographs I sign
Inferior fan-recorder of my rhyme
Perfect spectator, well I’m the dominator
You rely and refine, it and you save it for later
Swipe it as you type it
You recite it as you bite it
Then you claim it as your own to get them excited
About it as you shout it
You don’t tell them how go it
And you repeat it and rock it
Multiply it, divide it, ya even sit inside it
It’s L.L.’s rhyme, I know ya wanna bite it
You announce, I pounce, destroy, annihilate
If you break, you’ll be straight when I eliminate
You study lke scholars and you write ’em on your collars
You’ll bomb and you’ll try before a million dollars
I get like a leopard, attack, ransack, disturb, cold crush
Use a line, I make ’em hush
The lovers in the taker, faker, lovers of the Lakers, simulator
Rap traitor,l perfect perpetrator
To see ya as you bit the words
You’d think you never heard
The mike sings like a hummin’ bird
Rock the Bells

Jack the Ripper
King Hercules
Professor of Death in the Seven Seas
Grim reaper of rhyme
Holder of the rock
Eradicating suckers all around the clock
The supreme machine
A microphone dream
My revenge is brutal when you start to scheme
I mean, you’re my adversary, I enjoy the feud
No Peruvian rock, cocaine or quaalude
The story, the beginning of your death is heard
But your cries are ignored by the kind of word
I’m the super insane murderer in the rain
Like a vampire goin’ for your jugular vein
Exterminating crews with my manuscript
And the best thing you wrote was a bunch of bullshit
The night of the nights
You’re my victim tonight
You ain’t nothin’ nobody so get outta any sight
Bein’ crushed by the source
It’s reinforced (thoughts)
Now ya feel remorse ’cause ya know who’s boss
L.L. Cool J is your undertaker
Def hit-maker plus a bone-breaker
Treble terminator, bass mutilator
You can drop your drawers, I’m a rapper castrator
On the microphone you will never recoup
When I’m finished with you, boy, you’ll be suckin’ on soup
Music virtuoso, melodical employer
I knew you was a sucker, first time I saw ya
Roll the red carpet, royalty’s arrived
Don’t try to fight back ’cause you won’t survive
So don’t never ever in any kind of weather
Try to mess with the tall young legend in leather
L.L. servin’ ’em well
The beat elevates and the scratch excels
Rock the Bells

	ERRRRRRRAGHHHHHHHH!