Archive for the ‘The MGMT’ Category

KISS YA’ MUDDAH!

Sunday, May 13th, 2007

kiss ya muddah

A big muah to all the ladies and mothers that eff with DP Dot Com.

I’m A Stan For SPIDER-MAN…

Thursday, May 3rd, 2007

spiderman week

For me it’s a story about the first comic book character I ever tried to draw. Then it becomes the realization of a character who doesn’t feel the skin he’s in. Spider-Man is the transcendant story of a teenager coming of age in the world. Imagine yourself feeling powerful and nearly invincible, but at the same time you are scared to kiss a girl because of your acne. What endears Spider-Man to you aren’t his strengths, but his weaknesses, his flaws. Marvel Comics forever broke the mold for the genre by portraying someone so inadequate and ultimately heroic not because of his power, but because of his responsibility to himself.

I have a few more DVD’s to mail away and I want to extend myself to the readership that has children at home.

  • ELOHEEM, you are steady in my comments section. Send your snail mail address to my e-mail address so I can shoot you a video.
  • Anyone else that wants a copy of the first Spider-Man movie in this current series only needs to answer this question. What is the mantra that Peter Parker/Spider-Man lives his life by after the death of his Uncle Ben?

    A LETTER FROM THE MANAGEMENT

    Tuesday, May 1st, 2007

    cold chillin

    C.S. and I hit up sunny South Beach for a little bit of R & R this past weekend, actually it was C.S. born day on Sunday so the kid thought he would take her to Ocean Drive to be amongst the glamorous and the fabulous. Turns out that some jigfest was also going down in Miami as well and it looked like a gotdamned video shoot. Did these bitches not get the memo?!? Excuse my use of the ‘B’ word for these ho’s, but there they were with their azzcheeks on front street, stumbling around on Collins and Ocean Drive wearing their first pair of stilettos.

    I’m mad at these broads because C.S. catches me looking at these ho’s all the time. The only reason I’m looking is because if I see one of my neighbors on the strip and I see she is looking a mess I will tell her to take her ho azz back home and sit down. Call me Captain Save A Ho.

    The page went to re-runs for a hot minute and I see that no one is really interested in fucking with the Ghetto Celeb Mathematics. I had two of them joints being drafted up, but y’all have saved me the trouble of fucking with that shit and all the photo-editing work. I will switch my pitch up and get some more new Wig Owners drops back on the page since those seem to be crowd favorites.

    This week however is going to be all about Spider-Man and the movie sequel that also premieres this week. We have tons of giveaways to celebrate the movie and comic book culture as well as another Pirate Radio Podcast. DP Dot Com had gone fishing for a minute, but now we’re back on our grizzly fo’ shizzly.

    P.S. Don’t eat the fish.

    gramps got the worm

    I Left My Heart At Howard U. (MGMT ReMiXXXes)

    Sunday, April 29th, 2007

    222

    Labor Day for me was always the time of year to refocus and prioritize on what it was that I wanted for myself for the rest of the year. I typically spent the summer playing the field of love, but in late August my hormones turned up the frequency so I didn’t end up with zero during the snowswept snuggle and cuddle winter months. I preferred a cutie from one of the Black colleges that occupied the mid-Atlantic states because I could always hop on the turnpike for a few hours and I still had my relative autonomy while I remained in New York City. I would have sworn to you that NYC had the greatest collection of redbone cuties until SOUNDWAVE, RANDY and I came across a pack of hotties from Howard University during the 1989 Labor Day Greekfest at Virginia Beach.

    RANDY was S.W.’s cousin who lived in VA Beach. RANDY’s folks put us up for the weekend and we all spent our time on the strip bothering anything that would give us the time of day. As usual, I have to be the clown of the crew and the sassy sisters didn’t mind putting me in my place when I got too sideways. My G was always too futuristic for young girls anyhoo. I needed some college meat to test my mettle. I complimented toenail polish colors and whoever had done the best job in shaving herself. My dudes and I were having a good enough time just posting up on the boardwalk when along came this crew of cocksmashers. I call them that because they all had their walk together and proper. You know that walk that a young lady has when she is trying to tell everybody that she has been doing her ‘Kegel’ exercises? These little girls had that walk and they had the prettiest eyelashes of any crew that was on the strip that weekend. These broads had that kryptonite.

    big pimpin'

    The next step for the dudes and I was to get to know this crew of young sweet hotness, but how do you break into a girl group that is seven deep without getting dissed and dismissed? This is my specialty. I attack the alpha females top lieutenant with my charm. Not the alpha female, because she will have to show out for her girls to prove her leadership dominance, and not the weakest link among the ladies who is still slightly uncomfortable in her skin and may not know how to receive a compliment yet. The second in charge was a tender little brownskin sister with a battery pack bubble backside just as sweet as a piece of chocolate cake. In my mind, I am sure I made that sound where your lips smack just as you are about to enjoy something tasty.

    “Hello Ms. Beautastic, you look just like my favorite cup of coffee, dark and sweet.”

    Okay, I agree, but that is how you do it people — confident cornballness. The laugh of the sister and some of her friends meant that I hit my target. The next step was for me to introduce my dudes. S.W. and RANDY are both good lookin’ dudes so that wasn’t the problem in as much as there were seven ladies and only three of us. Don’t play yourself into thinking that ratio means menage status because most college girls in the ’80s and ’90s that weren’t into coke weren’t into swinging either. Don’t get me wrong, college girls were always giving up mean head and booty pie, but unless they were from Detroit you weren’t gonna be able to freak out.

    big pimpin'

    None of these ladies were from the ‘D’ either. They were all Cali broads that were attending Howard University. They were all freshmen and they had heard about the Greekfest on campus so they decided to drive down. 18yr olds with their own cars 3000 miles from home. I give credit to these Cali broads for being as gangster as they were. They drove to the beach on a whim and they didn’t even have a hotel room. We all hung together for the rest of the day into the evening. Later that evening when the strip was fully crowded and blown out a riot began. It was so crazy that Army helicopters and National Guardsmen cut off access to the beach. Since we were all stuck together we decided to share a hotel room. Real talk is that all 10 of us slept together on two queen size beds and no one popped off anything.

    What that night allowed us was carte blanche to hang with these sisters at Howard U. anytime we wanted. S.W. and I ‘borrowed’ a Maserati from Greenich Village and went to their Homecoming weekend. The ladies brought us to a brunch spot called Julios that served chicken, waffles and mimosas for only $7 bucks a person. Those Howard U. chicks knew how to have a good time too. Almost twenty years later I am still friends with them. Even the ones that I’m not friends with anymore.

    Too bad youth is wasted on the young.

    WIG OWNERS > WIG BRUSHERS: The LIBERACE Edition (MGMT’s ReMixes)

    Sunday, April 29th, 2007

    liberace

    Show that Wig Owner LIBERACE some respect. He would rather die from the AIDS than let you see him without his wig right. Chances are that your grandma wanted to brush his wig too.

    liberace

    LIBERACE brought the bling to the Wig Owning game too. Full length furs and hand jewelry that are inspiring young DipSetters to this very day. LIBERACE used his somewhat sketchy musical talent and tremendous pop music appeal to transorm himself into an international Wig Owner. No one really knows who brushed LIBERACE’s wigs, but we can all agree that he owned many. You can see LIBERACE’s influence on some of today’s popular music Wig Owners…

    keys

    ALICIA KEYS = WIG OWNER
    Just like LIBERACE, sketchy piano talent plus tons of mass appeal have given Mrs.KEYS a lot of wigs to be brushed, and no one really knows for sure who brushes ALICIA’s wigs, but I have my suspicions

    kerry keys KRUCIAL KERRY KEYS = ALLEGED WIG BRUSHER
    Also known as MC Hat 2 Big he has been photographed holding ALICIA’s arm from time to time. This is one Wig Brusher that we like to call a ‘Beard’. And I’m not talking goatee, you hear me Mz.Peaches?

    piddy PUFF DIDDY = WIG OWNER
    Just when you think this fool done ran out of wigs… BAM! Take that, take that.

    kim KIM PORTER = ALL STAR WIG BRUSHER
    This Wig Brusher makes little babies out of nappy Yak tracks. When AL B. SURE lost all the moisture and lustre from his ‘good hair’ wig KIM PORTER went and got herself a Bad Boy

    misa MISA HYLTON-BRIM = WIG BRUSHER’s WIG BRUSHER
    If Wig Brusher’s ever form a union, MISA will be like the shop steward or something.

    brit BRITNEY SPEARS = WIG OWNER
    Whenever she wants to buy some new wigs she just sells pictures of her unborn fetus to People magazine.

    brit KEVIN FEDERLINE-SPEARS = WIG BRUSHER
    You don’t easily go from backup dancer to Wig Owner. J-HO did it, but look where her dancer husband ended up, and isn’t that dude that seeded Madonna back to returning cans and bottles in order to pay his rent?

    janet JANET JACKSON = WIG OWNER
    Miss JACKSON has been accumulating wigs since her days on ‘Good Times’.

    bigfoot baby girl JERMAINE DUPRI = WIG BRUSHER
    He studied well, and learned just the right amounts of moisturizer that the JACKSON family requires.

    hustle

    Did anyone peep the OPRAH last week where JANET JACKSON brought out JERMAINE DUPRI but he wasn’t allowed to speak?!? It’s not like J.D. has no talent at all either. He helped MARIAH CAREY get her wigs tight again. I feel like telling dude to man the fuck up, but then again, he seems kind of happy.

    You know who stays on some perpetual happy shit? Supreme cultural hustler RUSSELL SIMMONS be on that cash money wig owner yoga shit like what. He got so many wigs he don’t even need to wear one, but if he did you better believe it would be brushed like a motherfucker.

    hustle

    hustle RUSSELL SIMMONS = WIG OWNER
    From Def Jam to the Phat Farm, RUSSELL knows how to make jigs spend that loot. He has followed in the steps of wig owners like BERRY GORDY Jr. and QUINCY JONES to establish himself as one of the al time great hustlers of Black music and culture.

    miss kay KIMORA LEE SIMMONS = WIG BRUSHER
    A more sassy wig brusher you’d be hard pressed to find. She’s so high maintenance that she even needs her own wig brusher.

    paris MISA HYLTON-BRIM = WIG BRUSHER’s WIG BRUSHER
    Have brush, will travel.