Why are these people being allowed to kill music? Forget the moonwalk conspiracy for a moment and focus on the reality that the Black Eye Peas are ruining any remaining credibility to Hip-Hop and to the delicious taste of black eyed peas!
*as an aside, you MUST use fatback if you are making hoppin-john*
Good gravy I watched these clowns on Saturday Night Live this past weekend and they blew my mind at how horrible they were as performers. They were simply a collection of bouncing buffoons repeating vapid single line nursery rhymes. I know they have sold tens of millions of records but that belabors the point that the world is filled with people no smarter than assmunch.
The fact that these fucks are listed in Wikipedia as a Hip-Hop band is the problem I am having. They are like Milli Vanilli without the suicide (yet, oh God please hear me). This chick Fergie is closer to being 50yrs old than she is to being 30. I’ve seen her hands and them shits look gnarled. Someone might say that is from her years as a hardcore drug abuser but I think its just the fact that she as old as fux and doesn’t take well to moisturization.
The person we really need to be saved from is Will.I.Am. He isn’t just complicit in ruining rap music as a fake Timbaland producer but he is ruining comicbook franchises too. His casting in the Wolverine movie was a sire spot for me this past summer. If you thought Wale or Kid Cudi were bad for Hip-Hop then you must recognize the Black Eyed peas as the anti-Christ. Who will save our Hip-Hop now that NaS is buying beats from Will.I.Am?
Supremacy is good for shits and giggles when its done properly. Amos and Andy? Heeeelarious. The breaking of Kunta Kinte? Not so much. Making fun of people with different customs is the best when someone from that particular group is the one doing the jokes. RUSH LIMBAUGH talking shit about Mexicans isn’t as awesome as a Speedy Gonzalez cartoon.
BOB GRIESE had a touch of the Limbaugh vocal diarrhea when he made the televised comment that JUAN PABLO MONTOYA was “out having a taco”, in reference to MONTOYA’s standing on the NASCAR leaderboard. Because MONTOYA is a Colombian the GRIESE comment has been posited as a slight. I don’t see it that way though. If GRIESE had said that MONTOYA was eating a bandeja paisa or sniffing an ounce of fisscale that might could be considered a slight.
White on white crime?
Racism makes no fuckin’ sense. How is this white dude gonna be a racist to this other white dude? Just cause a guy speaks spanish are you telling me that he can’t be a white dude anymore? I wish someone would explain to me who the fux is really white and who is just passing for teh white. This means that El Gringo Colombiano is no longer a white dude. Now he’s just a Mexican like Tony’s Kansas City. Tony what up?
And what is so wrong with getting a taco? Who doesn’t enjoy the crunchy meat filled flavor of a taco? I goes apeshit for Chipotle tacos. The only way people could get upset over a taco is if they were a racist and you gave them one of those new Taco Bell black tacos, but even a virulent racist would have to admit that for $.89cents a black taco was a good deal. Racism is still fucked the fuck up, but a supremacist’s gastrointestinal system recognizes great taste and his wallet respects a great price.
Somebody get the execs from Disney and PepsiCo on the horn so we can shoot a Taco Bell black taco commercial with GRIESE and MONTOYA.
So let me get this straight… She pushes off in a sailboat and we wait the 3/4’s of a year to see if she gets back home? I wonder if she’s in cahoots somehow with the Balloon Boy? Who cares about this shit?
I personally think she is doing this stunt to fulfill some fantasy she has about having sex with a shark.
“Already long ago, from when we sold our vote to no man, the people have abdicated our duties; for the people who once upon a time handed out military command, high civil office, legions — everything, now restrains itself and anxiously hopes for just two things: bread and circuses.” -Juvenal, Roman poet circa 200 A.D.
“I want my MTV!” -Sting, rock musician circa 1985
Dire Straits – ‘Money For Nothing’
Nearly thirty years ago, in 1981 to be exact, the Music Television channel changed the soundscape of American music by broadcasting music videos. These videos weren’t simply montaged clips of artists holding their instruments while ain a studio recording session, they were shortform musical narratives. Back then some of the videos had million dollar budgets capable of bankrupting today’s independent music labels (Koch Records, er, E-1 Entertainment). This was because music videos became the primary promotional tool for records. That’s a dangerous game to play though when you use something visual to convince your ears it is worth your time and engagement. The racket worked for Music Television up until recently.
If videos killed the radio star then the internets killed the music channel. For Music Television to retain the attention of the vaunted 14-24yr old demographic (i.e.: people living in their parent’s homes spending all of their income on material shit) they are going to have to get more modern, not cooler, but hipper. The old people that sit in the offices of Music Television still think that choreographed stunts will keep them as the apple in the eye of the youth. Don’t you ever think for a minute that when Justin Timberlake exposed Janet Jackson’s horrifying breastring at the same exact moment his ‘Rock Your Body’ verse stated “cause I gotta have you naked by the end of this song” that moment wasn’t choreographed? This is the shit they do now. Madonna tongue kissing Britney and Cristina is also their design. Sasha Baron Bruno’s ballsachs on Eminem’s chin is on their resume also.
As the music industry has been transformed by the internets so has Music Television. Viral video clips have replaced programming so instead of producing a themed show the producers at MTV are busy trying to craft a viral video moment. If ou think the exec that liberated Janet’s tittay wasn’t promoted when the smoke cleared you don’t understand the entertainment industry. MTV wants your eyeballs so bad they would do anything. In the high stakes game of dwindling advertising monies I won’t put them above staging anything. Their offices are on BROADWAY for crissakes!
The desire for Music Television is for the spectacle that has responsible people discussing these moments long after their value. One of the main reasons I don’t have cable television (aside from the fact that I can’t afford it) is that I don’t want to hypnotized by Music Television’s vacuous programming. This includes all the MTV substations like MTV2, Vh-1 and B.E.T. Sometimes I have to laugh that Black Entertainment Television is kept in the Viacom’s virtual slave quarters. They receive only the slave portions of programming. Pig’s feet amd chitterlings. B.E.T. recently fired their online editor Andreas Hale. I wonder if it was because he failed to be the company man that Viacom demands, especially of their Black employees.
Look at the Black people that work at MTV as an example. Other than generating lists that relate to rap as well as a Vibe list might they at least have the good sense to forego any individual acclaim. They are called the ‘Brain Trust’ which is certainly an oxymoron in itself, but recently they have renamed themselves the ‘1515 Boyz’. This is hilarious to me since I know that 1515 Broadway is the address of MTV’s headquarters. Since 1515 is the building’s house number aren’t these MTV employees actually referring to themselves as ‘house boys’? Let the internets SMH in unison. There is nothing good that will come from Music Television. Nothing but a choreographed circus.
