Archive for the ‘5000’ Category

Sinning And Winning For The Rapture…

Friday, May 20th, 2011


In just 24 hours the rapture will be upon mankind. No, not a Blondie reunion concert, but the whole rapture from the book of Revelations with the pale white horse and the cataclysmic catechism.

It kind’a sux that the Internets Celebrities are rolling out a brand new series of films on June 1st because some of you folks won’t be around to see them. We put our hearts and souls into these movies when we prA’li should have been spending that time in church.

Just know that the I.C.s will be on the team that is fighting against the armies of Satan and pretty much anyone trying to hate on the internets. If this is mankind’s final stand then at least feel good about us because we are bringing truth to power, and power to the people.

Actually, we’re kind of illuminating…

Schwarze Negger = Black Plowman…

Thursday, May 19th, 2011

Do you remember in 2008 when Arnold Schwarzenegger was criticized for referring to a Latina legislator in California as hot-blooded?

Dude knew how spanish chicks got down because he already had a latin baby momma even before he took his seat in the Golden State governor’s mansion. Schwarzenegger was apparently taking the ‘plowman’ part of his surname to heart.

If you love schadenfreude as much as me you will love to see all the Republican lawmakers crawl out from their fox(news)holes throw Arnold under the political bus. Just a few short years ago he was a political darling in the Republican party. There were even some movements afoot to put him in the direction of the White House.

As long as Republican’s push a moral agenda alongside their xenophobia they will be losers because for the most part they are all philandering, homosexual criminals.

Kobe Bryant > Michael Jordan…

Monday, March 7th, 2011

mj vs kb

Statistics don’t lie, so liars use statistics.

Jordan fans are clutching the crown so hard that they don’t even recognize MJ is no longer in possession of it. At some point even they gonna have to respeckanize that Kobe Bryant will have done it better and longer [ll].

African Strongman Sunglass Swag…

Monday, March 7th, 2011

khadafi

No matter how the supremacist media spells this dude’s name he stays rocking some fresh shades.

KHADAFI

GHADAFI

KADAFFI

GADDAFI

khadafi
khadafi
khadafi

What the fux is good with all of dude’s military regalia? Does he have a framed photo on his lapel? Sonn isn’t crazy, but he is definitely ill.

Snail Mail Fail…

Saturday, March 5th, 2011

internets

Postal Service May Be Broke by October

I better get all my snail mail packs out to you dudes before August.