The weather and the scene in New York has been too good to blog.
All the ladies are coming out this summer with their new titties on front street. Unfortunately, the peasant skirt fashion craze hasn’t ended yet. At least some of y’all aren’t wearing any drawls under your skirts.
I am mad that STACEY DASH is so fucking gorgeous in the photo shoot she did for the upcoming Playboy magazine. I admit that I slept on Ms.DASH as B.M. status. Yeah, I wanted to beat her little seat, but I didn’t want to bust up in it. After I saw these photos I realized that I need to get one of her eggs. I know cloning is immoral and the whole nine, but what if you could go to the supermarket and get a carton of STACY DASH eggs? I would put those in a cup and drink them.
[Editor’s note: if you can’t open the above link you will need to get a password from BLU CHEEZ]
I feel a little fucked up about going to the newsstand and buying this magazine since I too want Black women to be portrayed by the media in the proper light. Speaking of light(ing), the scenes that Playboy is using are wonderfully lit and they really show Ms.DASH’s marvelous 40year old physique. Fuck what your heard, STACEY has made 40 the new 20 and I want to pummel fire out of her cocoa tanned backside. I want to beat her little pum pum up like she said something bad about my momma’s cooking. I want to see if I can leave my handprint on her firm, oil-sheened azz.
Getting back to the whole media image thing… I think it’s a powerful feminist statement that STACEY DASH is making by posing in Playboy. She is taking control of her image by not letting it be exploited by lesser publications like Maxim, Blender or Black Tail. Playboy is not pimping STACEY DASH, she is pimping Playboy.
Who am I kidding? The STACEY DASH Playboy mag is a collector’s item along with the VANESSA WILLIAMS Penthouse and the JAYNE KENNEDY Playboy.
STACEY DASH is the ultimate hustler.
Used to be a time when New York City was the mecca for free summer concerts. All the record labels would showcase their new up and coming talent in one of the many venues all around the city. Prospect Park’s bandshell and Central Park’s Rumsey Playground were the choice spots to hear good music and possibly meet the person that could give you some hot summer sex up to the month of October. Those were the days. The city still has a slew of free shows on it’s summer calendar, but remarkably there isn’t going to be anything worthwhile at Central Park. I wonder why.
I’ll discuss the politics of exclusion in another post, so for now take a peek at this schedule and highlight the events that you find sexy.
CityParks Foundation is the non-pro that runs the Central park Summerstage and many other in park concerts during the summer. Their schedule for July is looking right especially if you live in Brooklyn. Brazilian Girls, RICH MEDINA & BOBBITO, Litle Brother & JOELL ORTIZ all at Fort Greene Park. I am in there like swimwear.
The MARTIN LUTHER KING Jr. Concert Series is where my dad used to take us for as long as I can remember. I would swear to you that I have seen STEPHANIE MILLS there at least a dozen times and she never fails to please. It’s a great night to bring someone that you are in love with. This season they open with ANGIE STONE and ANT HAMILTON. New soul in an old favorite place.
SOCRATES Sulpture Park in Queensbridge has released the schedule for their Wednesday night flim festival. ‘Motorcycle Diaries’ at night under the stars is about as close as you can ask for heaven on Earth.
I almost cursed the scheduling gods that put the Hudson River Flicks on the same day as SOCRATES’, but thankfully there isn’t a conflict. ‘Jaws’, ‘Goldfinger’, “Good Fellas’ and ‘A Clockwork Orange’ means that I may not be getting my NetFlix monies worth this summer. Check the schedule for their Friday nite shows too.
My favorite movie screening under the stars is now inside Brooklyn Bridge Park. The hipster reclamation of D.U.M.B.O. is now complete with their Thursday night film festival. This is one of the jazziest venues and its complemented with a jazzy DJ set that spins before each flick and a jazzy thai food stand that doles out what ever it is that hipsters eat. The festival has a hot little lineup this summer. ‘The Wizard of Oz’ and ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’ will be fun, but ‘Pee Wee’s Big Adventure’ and ‘The Warriors’ make this spot my number one Thursday Jumpoff.
Bring a blanket C.S. and I will bring my flask. Holler at a moviegoer when you see one in the streets.
Watching the tournament at Wimbledon this weekend reminded me how much I cram to understand what’s really good with SERENA WILLIAMS. Her sister VENUS is as dope as a bump of Double Dragon (circa Taft housing projects 1993), but SERENA is the truth. And when it’s time to get fly SERENA knows how to step correct.
I remember there were the rumors that she had a slight case of P-funk, but I have to be honest with y’all… I’m kind of into that. Just not too funky. But I dig chicks that can get a little musky and sweaty. In my mind sweat ain’t nothin’ but GOD’s natural lubrication.
I can imagine being in the locker room after she has had a grueling match with some chick that the crowd wanted to win. SERENA is all sweaty and emotionally spent and I start to towel dry her muscular shoulders and behind her neck. I tell her to lift her arms so that I can place the soft cotton towel around and betwen her chest. I massage her as I dry her body to alleviate some of the tension that she has built up. It’s difficult to be SERENA WILLIAMS because everybody wants to see you fail, but she manages to perservere. As I am drying her stomach with the towel, and my arms are wrapped around her, my lips kiss her clavicle. I then begin to suckle upon her neck and work my way up to the soft skin right behind her ear.
Damn, Monday morning came quick.
And so did I.
True story is that I was crushing on PHYLLIS HYMAN back in the day. Yeah VANESSA was my first, but I would have gotten my polygamy on with PHYLLIS’ hymen in a hot one. I got a chance to meet her at some formal event that my dad was hosting. Damn she was beautiful and tall. It was like being in the presence of a celestial being. I am over 6ft and her hand was bigger than my ribcage.
In my mind she had the original pained voice that SADE has been getting paid off using. Except PHYLLIS had that voice because she was really in pain. I can relate to depression from cocaine use. It’s wicked bad. You don’t want to get out of bed. All the window shades are pulled down. You take the phone off the hook so you don’t have to hear it ring.
I wish there was someone that she could have talked to in confidence. Someone that could have told her that we loved her not just for her voice, but also for her vulnerability.
Happy birthday sweet goddess. Hurry up this way again.
