Archive for December, 2005

Long Live the CURSE of RAE CARRUTH

Thursday, December 22nd, 2005

for shannon

This saturday the Dallas Cowboys will visit the Carolina Panthers at Bank of America Stadium. The Panthers have a playoff berth and homefield advantage at stake. The Cowboys are in desperate need of a win to keep their playoff hopes alive.

Cowboys hang the Panthers for Christmas due to the ‘Curse of RAE CARRUTH’.

The ‘Curse’ has been with the Panthers ever since the problematic Carolina wide receiver RAE CARRUTH arranged a hit on one of his B.M.’s (baby’s momma) to avoid paying her child support.

In other NFL action…

Giants vs. Redskins
– With all the Injuns opening up casinos across the country you might be tempted to put a few chips on these much improved ‘Skins, but keep in mind that the Giants are actually from New Jersey a/k/a MafiaLand. Do you remember what happened to JIMMY HOFFA when he ass bet with house money?

Patriots at Jets – Now that Congress has renewed the Patriot Act and the Transportation Safety Administration has lessened the restrictions for airline travel the double entendre and irony are flying high. Don’t expect any fireworks from this contest though because these Jets blow, and I’m definitely not talking about Lockerbie.

MERRY CHRISTMAS from F.E.M.A.

Thursday, December 22nd, 2005

chillin

Nothing’s too good for our people.

Rock on, Bush country, rock on.

AND NOW… A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR

Tuesday, December 20th, 2005

chamboogie

HAVE YOU KILLED A TREE FOR CHRIST TODAY?!?

Tuesday, December 20th, 2005

merry christmas bitches

Did you ever wonder why we kill a tree to celebrate a birth?

A Portland, Oregon tree hugging company came up with a great idea for my money: Christmas tree rental. And after you have finished humiliating the tree with your pagan ornaments, the company will pick up the tree and donate it to a school or park where it can live a natural tree life, which prah’lee means getting pissed on by dogs and humans alike.

Get On The Bus!

Tuesday, December 20th, 2005

ralph kramden

The big deal right now in NYC is whether or not the union of mass transit workers is going to strike.

There was a time in this country when unions were highly respected and business managers understood that they had to pay their employees a reasonable and fair wage for their services, or suffer the consequences. But that was during the time of segregated bathrooms, so who wants to go backwards?

The truth is this: The Metropolitan Transportation Authority is comprised of nearly 60% African American employees. In a city where Blacks are a little over 30% of the population that sounds like progress to me.

If these MTA folks are so hard up for money, they should just throw one of those BYOB house parties that you have to pay a $5 cover to get into. MTA worker BYOB parties are guaranteed hook-up joints. I can’t tell you how many high school dropout transit workers I have have smashed over the years.

Yeah y’all, them transit workers get it crunk. They don’t just need raises, they need a carton of condoms and a case of K-Y jelly. C’mon Governor PATAKI, show the brothers a little love.