Bandwidth be damned this month because I can’t get enough of these YouTube classics.
I put YouTube right alongside indoor plumbing as one of man’s better achievements
Archive for May, 2006
More STEVELAND HARDAWAY JUDKINS For You Earholes
Thursday, May 11th, 2006SNEAKER FIENDS UNITE!
Thursday, May 11th, 2006
From deep in the center of the Earth I present to you, the DALLASPENN.COM ‘HEATROX A.M.’95’
Ohmigod the hits keep coming from the NIKE Design Studio. You can officially hate me now. The series of shoes designed at the studio is getting sicker and sicker. The A.M. ’95s are covered in the studios’ exclusive leather and the altitude green ‘swoosh’ is still reppin’ for each shoe in the series.
The A.M. 95’s have massive street cred because most of y’all youngbloods was just turning into teenagers when they first dropped. DALLASPENN.COM is the formatted hard drive for everything F.R.E.S.H. so you know we had to copp a pair of these jawns.
The next series at the design studio will feature Dunks and Air Force 1’s. If you think you’re ready to change the game then holler at me. I will be hosting a Dunk party at the design studio.
THE HUSTLER’s POSTERCHILD
Wednesday, May 10th, 2006
As much as PATRICK EWING was the superstar of the 90’s Knick teams, CHARLES OAKLEY and JOHN STARKS were the heart and soul.
JOHN was just a simple ‘Bama boy from Tulsa, Oklahoma. He wasn’t drafted by any NBA teams after his college career and he was languishing back in Tulsa bagging groceries as a supermarket clerk. But JOHN was a hustler in the true sense of the word and he had a dream of playing professional basketball. NBA scouts spotted JOHN during a stint in the Continental Basketball Association and he was signed by the Golden State Warriors. It was in 1990, when JOHN brought his played out flat-top haircut, his ‘Bama accent and his insurmountable well of energy to the New York Knicks that he took over this city. MICHAEL JORDAN ruled the NBA and he loved to PWNED! the Knicks PATRICK EWING. All the rest of the Knicks were cowed in deference to JORDAN except crazy JOHN STARKS.
People will always talk about that 7th game of the 1994 Finals where JOHN shot only 2 for 18 from the field. What most people don’t remember about that game was that the rest of the Knicks squad were the ones that choked up. OLAJUWON turned EWING into a church mouse with his dazzling efficiency in the paint. The way OTIS THORPE was grabbing boards made OAKLEY look like a tree, or better yet a bump on a log. The only Knick that had any heart left was the streaky STARKS. I ain’t mad at’cha JOHN. Plus, do you remember the STARKS headbutt on REGGIE MILLER?!? Classic shit homies.
Dig this YouTube retrospective on your boy STARKY LOVE.
HALLE BERRY = STORM = WTF??!!??
Wednesday, May 10th, 2006
The ‘X-Men’ movies have been well written and well cast up to this post. But I was so upset that the producers chose HALLE BERRY to portray one of the team’s strongest and most important characters. HALLE BERRY makes STORM look like a video ho instead of a goddess. Her acting in the role has been weak and indescisive. She has given STORM the persona of a flimsy chick that isn’t built for the rough stuff.
What were these fucktards thinking about instead of casting the ‘Chocolate Truth’? ANGELA BASSETT is everything in reality that HALLE BERRY can’t be even in a fantasy world. Remember when ANGELA BASSETT took that azz whuppin’ from Morpheus? And then he still had enough in her tank to turn out TAYE DIGGS.
The STORM character is a grown ass woman. She becomes the team leader when Cyclops resigns and she is essentially the strongest member until Jean Grey gets turned out by the M’Kraan crystal. STORM is so bad she doesn’t even take shit from crazy 7-thirty Wolverine.
That’s the kind of confidence you get from growing up in Africa. Y’all know how fucked up Africa is for kids. You better be strong willed if you are going to survive over there. Even though STORM was super powerful she wasn’t all dyked out. She had a softness to her. a lipstick lesbian sensibility if you will permit me to say.
Maybe STORM would choose women over men, but I ain’t hating her for that since I do too.
STEVIE WONDER TRIBUTE PARTY THIS SATURDAY
Wednesday, May 10th, 2006
You don’t want to miss this event. It’s going down something serious Saturday night.
More details at KeiStar Productions website.