Archive for July, 2006

GUESS WHO’s BIZZZACK!!!

Tuesday, July 18th, 2006

janet

On the heels of her successful return to the pop music charts its been announced that JANET JACKSON and JERMAINE DUPRI will be getting married in the autumn of this year.

I decided to ask my Macintosh, Mr.COMPUTO, to create a rendering of what their offspring might look like if JANET decided to have another child.

lizard baby

What Would JESUS Say?

Tuesday, July 18th, 2006

madbush

I hope that all of you realize that the broadcast comments from G DUBBZ during the G8 lunch were all part of a viral commercial for Diet Coke.

All of us know that Syria is backing Hezbollah. No big news there. The president using curse words? Who the fuck cares? The real winner is the Coca-Cola Company after the president expressed his preference for Diet Coke.

To diffuse this situation the president should hold a press conference where we see him drink a Diet Pepsi. With all that this administration has done to screw up U.S. politics I suppose that’s as close as we are going to get to any bi-partisanship on the Beltway anyhoo.

HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY

Tuesday, July 18th, 2006

ren & stimpleton

I’m picking up a copy today of the lost episodes DVD for ‘The Ren & Stimpy Show’. When this show first debuted back in 1990 it was the only thing on cable worth watching next to SportsCenter.

It was like watching Looney Tunes on angel dust, mushrooms and a case of really cheap malt liquor. The show was insane bananas. I laughed out loud to keep from puking. If animated throw up is funny to you then ‘Ren & Stimpy’ will be your cartoon medicine. The lost episodes are all the work of Ren & Stimpy’s original creator, JOHN KRICFALUSI. He was fired by the suits at Nickolodeon two years after developing the show because the humor was considered too subversive for children’s programming.

The truth is that the humor might be too edgy for some adults too. KRICFALUSI and his production company SpumCo turn up the humor another notch for the lost episodes. These segments were produced for a televison series that was called the Adult Party Cartoon. In one of the new episodes we find out that Stimpy might be pregant. Even though Stimpy is a boy cat so that would make it virtually impossible for him to be pregnant, Ren still has a solution.

ren & stimpleton

Ren & Stimpy don’t try to offend you just for the sake of disturbing your sensibilities. They are just that stupid and self-absorbed. ‘Ren & Stimpy’ remind me of the classic Looney Tunes cartoons because they rely on visual gags as well the scripted comedy and slapstick. There has been a lot of adult cartoons created in the wake of ‘Ren & Stimpy’. Some of it has been good, like ‘The Boondocks’, ‘South Park’ and ‘The Family Guy’ while some of it hasn’t been quite as memorable or mentionable. For the simple fact that the execs at Viacom have hated on ‘Ren & Stimpy’ means that I have to support this piece of art. Plus, I want to see the episode where Stimpleton thinks he’s pregnant.

ren & stimpleton

Hey! Did you kids know that PEE WEE’s Playhouse is on Adult Swim every night at 11pm?

Well then why didn’t you tell me?!?

WHO’s THE MAN?!?

Tuesday, July 18th, 2006

pppants

I know I told you kids that Israel was gonna bring the pain.

Don’t start peeing in your pants now.

A Moment Of Silence…

Monday, July 17th, 2006

chi town sunset

I got some sad news this weekend that a member of our web-cipher and a very dear friend of mine just lost his dad. I suppose that we are at the age where we will have to assume the mantle as leaders for our respective family units. Our parents have done yeoman’s work by preparing us for this moment, but it still doesn’t mitigate the loss of a loved one. Especially not the first superhero that you ever knew.

Take a moment today to reach out to someone that you love and tell them this much. Take a moment to pause for my brother and pray that he will be strong at this time. I also need to take a moment to remind myself who I dedicated this website to.

Peace.

mom dad