Archive for February, 2007

SPACEBALLS: The Sequel…

Tuesday, February 6th, 2007

dark helmet

How the fuck are you gonna try to kidnap someone in space?!? How the hell are you gonna run away? Where the fuck are you gonna hide? There are certain crimes that I know were perpetrated by white. A Black will mug your azz fo’sho. Kidnapping? Not so much.

Why did an astronaut try to kidnap somebody? Was she going to try to hide them in her spacesuit? Its crazy, but white always amazes how they stay on that kidnap steez. It’s not like they didn’t already put in hell’a work during the Middle Passage, Reconstruction and the Holocaust. I guess the world is never enough.

It’s Bricker Than A Muv Up In This Muv…

Monday, February 5th, 2007

ice, ice baby

Which is still no excuse for my anemic posting this weekend. Can I say that I killed a bottle of Belvy for delf during the Super Bowl. That shit is the smoothest vodka known to man. I didn’t O.D. on crappy snacks either. Kept it real eye level. Cold cuts and chicken wings. The Super Bowl was a surprising good game even though CBS made a point to not wiping off the rain soaked camera lens. I’m glad that TONY DUNGY gets to be a Super Bowl winning coach, but real talk is how did DOMINIC RHODES not get the MVP award for the way he shredded the Chicago defense? Oh, I almost forgot, PEYTON MANNING is the white Jesus.

greco stuffing

How gay are sports? So gay that high school wrestling in Minnesota has been banned because there was an outbreak of herpes. The irony wrapped around the conundrum was that the outbreak was believed to have originated from a wrestler at Valentine High School in Nebraska. Dayum, so this is how they celebrate Valentine’s Day in the midwest? Whatever happened to motherfuckers just giving each other heart shaped cards and shit?!?

juicy

Speaking of high school kids, and Valentine’s Day and sexually transmitted diseases. Texas governor, RICK PERRY is requiring grade schoolers to be innoculated with a vaccine that reportedly prevents the human papillomavirus, or HPV. This virus can cause cervical cancer if undetected for a prolonged period. I am a big opponent of the pharmaceutical industrial complex and I feel like this proposal by the Texan governor is filled with some corrupt kickback incentives, but I can’t deny that I hate cervical cancer in women either. The ugly beauty of America is that you are damned if you do and certainly damned if you don’t.

bol

One of the best bloggers on the internets is BYRON ‘BOL’ CRAWFORD. His honesty and wit has made him a cult figure among all of us who submit commentary of society, art, culture, love and whatever else comes to mind. BOL has made the leap to video blogging, even though the video blog is someone elses. If RAFI and I can change the face of Hip-Hop blogging then why can’t other Internets Celebrities get their day in the sun? I’m waiting to see Nah’Rights ESKAY and and Crunktastical’s FRESH in a porno together. Nullus, of course to that last sentence.

SNEAKER FIENDS UNITE!

Monday, February 5th, 2007

fab five

Do you remember CHRIS WEBBER and the rest of the talented players from the University of Michigan’s ‘Fab Five’ era? There was a time in America when universities like Michigan were segregated and the only place for Black athletes to play a sanctioned game of semi-professional basketbal would be through the athletic club circuit.

These athletic cubs were founded by progressive Blacks that had a desire for community building and upward mobility even though the country had strict Black Codes and Jim Crow laws that forbade Blacks and whites from sharing spaces. In those years a basketball team would be known as ‘Fives’ since that was the number of players that each team put on the court. Think of a Negro Leagues for basketball players. And just like the Negro leagues a ‘Black Fives’ game was an event unto itself. It was a social gathering and an affirmation of community. You may or may not be familiar with some of the great players that were once Black Fivers. PAUL ROBESON, CUMBERLAND POSEY, and JOHN ISAACS are just a few of the names of the great athletes that participated in this network.

NIKE stays on their Black History grind and similiar to what they did for the bringing Negro Leagues style back to the light they have created a line of apparel and footwear that salutes the spirit of the early Black basketball pioneers here in this country. The line is simply called ‘The Black Fives’. NIKE partnered with the Black Fives Foundation in order to create these items that honors the entrepreneurship and true talent that these teams displayed. Using logos and namesakes from the actual teams as well as the original colorways, NIKE pays homage to the great game and the truly great pioneers.

I had to cop the Harlem Renaissance Dunks. They are only $50 right now at V.I.M. stores in New York and New Jersey. Holler at me on the e-mail if you want a pair. There are a few other teams on sale as well like the Smart Set Athletic Club Dunks and another team from Brooklyn called the Alpha Physical Culture Club. To learn more about The Black Fives history and the teams that paved the way prior to the Association click the link here.

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HOW SWEET IT IS…

Sunday, February 4th, 2007

payton

Rest in peace to the spirit of WALTER PAYTON, one of the greatest evar. Nullus to the fact that his nickname was “Sweetness”.

Update: Bears suck. But what would you expect from a team who’s best player was named DICK BUTTKISS?

Whoever won the Super Bowl pool should e-mail Dallas or Billy with a mailing address.

Chea!

ditka

JAY-Z Gets Reparations For Black People In Brooklyn…

Sunday, February 4th, 2007

jayzee

or, Why Is This Man Smiling So Hard?

There was a huge groundswell of grassroots chagrin and skepticism when Barclay’s Bank of London was awarded the bid for the naming rights to the arena portion of JAY-Z’s new megaplex real estate development in Brooklyn.

Yes, the same Barclay’s Bank that was a major underwriter for the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade. Yes, the same Barclay’s Bank that has profitted from generation of civil war in central Africa. Yes, the same Barclay’s Bank that kept South Africa afloat during it’s apartheid regime when even the most greedy corporations had left that country shores. Is JAY-Z being used as a pawn by actual Net’s owner BRUCE RATNER, to satiate the colored people that are opponents of this eminent domain project or is JAY-Z the most incredible Black visionary since MARCUS GARVEY? Let’s examine some of the clues…

  • Barclay’s Bank profitted during the slave trade by loaning monies to England based shipping companies to help build and modernize their fleets for voyages across the Atlantic Ocean.
  • Barclay’s Bank will lend it’s name to a modern building that sits atop railyards across Atlantic Avenue
  • Barclay’s Bank was a major sponsor for the nation of South Africa even though their apartheid government was denounced across the globe for it’s violations against human rights.
  • Reebok Co. which manufactures JAY-Z’s ‘S Dot Carter’ footwear line was also a major corporate sponsor of South Africa during apartheid.
  • Barclay’s Bank gives away guns to war torn countries like Congo in order to facilitate the plundering of the country’s resources.
  • JAY-Z goes to the Marcy Avenue housing project and gives away free CD’s for Christmas
  • Those examples listed provide proof of the corporate synergy that JAY-Z and Barclays both share, but what if JAY were to take his 0.0000001 stake ownership in the Nets and his profits from the sale of the arena’s naming rights and buy a turkey for all of the families that are being kicked out of Brooklyn on their asses? I think Brooklyn residents need to start seeing that turkey as our reparations for slavery.

    My advice to Brooklyn is to take the turkey while it’s available. That’s as good as shit is gonna get and in a minute it’s about to get a lot worse.

    Roc-A-Fella y’all.