Like a candle in the wind. Or 16 of them.
Shouts to JB & LB
Archive for August, 2009
R.I.P. JOHN HUGHES
Sunday, August 9th, 2009Mountain Dew Goes Ultra Violet…
Sunday, August 9th, 2009
So we all know that I fux with the Mountain Dew blue (Voltage) totally. I’m sure I’ll be dead from heart disease on my own before I have to deal with any adverse effects of a HFCS sweetened aqua-marine colored cola. If you haven’t tried MTN DEW blue you seriously have no idea what you are missing. What? You planning on living forever? Fuck that shit. I’m living today.
After several impassioned YouTube clips and a little politicking from HowFresh to the folks that market Mountain Dew I was given an invite to taste the newest MTN DEW at some funky obama with free food. I wasn’t sure how the set up would work out so I put a call in to my young homey from the TWitter – RLFNOWHERE. I asked fam to come through the event and hold the handycam for me while I talked that DP ish.
I owe HowFresh an apology because I didn’t think he was gonna push for me to get a word in with the whole PepsiCo. braintrust, but How is ultimately a man of his word. I’m not sure if I impressed on the marketers how serious I felt about their product or maybe I came across a little too fanatical. What can I say? My fanboy engine gets turned on and the next thing you know I am jumping through plate glass windows. Thank goodness there was no plate glass at this spot.
Mountain Dew rented out the swanky new Brooklyn Bowl in Williamsburg for the event. My biggest regret was not going in on the food hardbody. There were some crabcake appetizers that were for the win. I did get busy on the drinks though(naturally – natch) and I did beat HowFresh on the lanes so at least the Mets pwned the Yankees in that arena. The marketers sent us to this area where a MTN DEW technician taught us the how to make our own special Dew using their secret ingredients.
At the end of the day however the new diet Mountain Dew needs a shape up. First, the people at Pepsi need to kill the word ‘diet’ on their product. That shit is gheyer than a bag of dildos in RuPaul’s apartment. Whenever I see someone drinking a ‘diet’ soda I think that person would rather have a Tab or a penis in their mouth. My bad to anyone that like diet sodas. In my opinion the fact that this product is zero calories is enough of an attraction. What idiot doesn’t understand that zero cals means no sugar?
The marketers should have called this product MD UV ZC. That’s DP’s urban shorthand for Moutian Dew UltraViolet Zero Calories. How hot would that be? I still get the energy (read: caffeine) of a regular MTN DEW product but now their isn’t any sugar to push my blood insulin count out the roof. Sounds like a win for the kid if you ask me. The Mountain Dew UltraViolet flavor is being released with a limited run starting this week so if you see a bottle pick one up and try it out. If you don’t like it I will mail you a refund.
No, really.
The clip above was taken when the MTN DEW camera got at me.
Here’s the clip we made without the bigtime flashing lights…
School Is In Session…
Friday, August 7th, 2009
MEL D. COLE is the world’s most dangerous photographer…
Every week the Roots Jam Session features surprise guests that put their talents on display along with the mighty musicianship of the Roots themselves. During this residency there have been some stellar performances from great artists and some veteran artists have looked like rookies up on stage.
That was the case on Tuesday when JANELLE MONAE thought she had killed the crowd and prior to walking off the stage she simply dropped the microphone. I understand that Ms.MONAE is touring with ERYKAH BADU and she might be accruing some of the diva tendencies that BADU is known for, but in all my years of seeing BADU perform I have never seen her drop a microphone in the vicinity of Black Thought.
Let me also say that I have never seen anyone have a grip on the mic as tight as TARIQ either. For you to come to the Jam Session and share the stage with this brother you should be happy that you even have the opportunity to work with him. But to drop the mic and walk off as if you just tore down the stage with your little raps was foolishness. JANELLE MONAE is dope as hell but she ain’t no BADU and ERYKAH ain’t no Black Thought.
Memo to JANELLE MONAE: Smarten’ up lil’ darling, it’s how you’ll get over.
The City That Never Sleeps…
Friday, August 7th, 2009
I am h8’ing NYC so much right now. It seems that every night there are several events that I really want to fux with but I can’t be in several places at once. I wish BILL GATES would hurry up with that human cloning project.
Last night had an obama with Patron shots and tons of TWitterati. There was another obama where Just Blaze was deejaying. My homeys Heems and Vik a.k.a Das Racist also had a show at the Bowery Ballroom. Das Racist is blowing up on the low. I fux with those dudes hardbody.
Back on the planet of Brooklyn, Prospect Park’s bandshell, which will be hosting Big Daddy Kane this Saturday was screening my generation’s ‘Rocky Horror Picture Show’ which is Prince’s ‘Purple Rain’. I don’t think that film has screened in NYC for the last 10 years and I haven’t been there to sing along. ‘Purple Rain’ is what I call Blackaoke.
But the real karaoke jumpoff was going down in Coney Island. HALL & OATES was doing a concert for the free seaside summer series that the Brooklyn beep MARTY MARKOWITZ hosts annually. This was going to be the first time I had seen these dudes perform live. HALL & OATES blue-eyed soul is definitely part of the soundtrack of my life. I bought the ‘Private Eyes’ album from The Wiz with my paper route paper back when I was in junior high.
I’m glad I found some time to spend with Chocolate Snowflake. She is the most patient and generous woman on these internets. I see that some of my steez has rubbed off on her too. She enterprised us some seats in the wristband VIP area. The show was a beautiful night under the stars in Coney Island. The full moon added that perfect romantic element. HALL & OATES ran through a litany of their hits and didn’t disappoint the crowd of thousands. It’s nights like this I wish would last forever.
DARRYL HALL still had the big hair and diva tendencies while JOHN OATES kindly played the sidekick role as always. I was kind of sad that JOHN shaved off the moustache entirely. These old dudes still rock though and their band was getting it in. HALL & OATES had the nerve to make me suffer though a second encore to get some of my favorite hits like ‘You Make My Dreams’ and ‘No Can Do’. I wasn’t going home without hearing those jams better still, I wasn’t going to let them go home.
Damn you New York City and your free concerts and cultural events.
I’m sure I will see some of you internets in Brooklyn on Saturday.
Until then…
‘You Make My Dreams’
‘Private Eyes’
‘Maneater’
‘I Can’t Go For That (No Can Do)’
‘Say It Isn’t So’
‘One On One’
‘Method Of Modern Love’
‘Out Of Touch’
‘Adult Education’
‘Kiss On My List’
Have Chicks, Will Travel…
Friday, August 7th, 2009
I am willing to bet you that former president BILL CLINTON beat out at least one of these journalists.
There is no way this dude goes on a road trip and doesn’t score.
