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Not For Long: Division And Conquer

Sunday, January 17th, 2010

jennings

The Saints bust that Cardinals ass something properlock, but the Saints ‘D’ wasn’t the best thing stopping the bumrush this weekend. The Colts and the Vikings damn near pitched shutouts. Those defenses racked up major points for this round. All the teams with 1st round byes came out hardbody except for the San Diego Chargers who ran into a destiny filled bulldozer called the New York Jets.

There’s no way the Jets are gonna beat the Colts next week for the AFC crown. After watching the ref’s calls against the Baltimore Ravens you could surmise that the NFL wants their MVP to play a lot longer into the postseason. The Jets will open a brand new stadium next year in the Meadowlands so maybe the league will let them get to the title tilt next year like the MLB pushed the Yankees to the forefront?

DP = 131pts

QB – Tony Romo = 9pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
RB – Willis McGahee = 1pt
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
WR – Reggie Wayne = 12pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
K – Garrett Hartley = 10pts
D/ST- Baltimore Ravens = 3pts

Ami Hobbes = 91pts

QB – Philip Rivers = 27pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
RB – Felix Jones = 9pts
WR – Reggie Wayne = 12pts
D/ST- Minnesota Vikings = 12pts

King Blair = 156pts

QB – Brett Farve = 35pts
RB – Reggie Bush = 22pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
K – Matt Stover = 9pts

BigNat = 165pts

QB – Brett Favre = 35pts
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
FLEX – Ray Rice = 12pts
K – Matt Stover = 9pts
D/ST- Dallas Cowboys = 3pts

40 = 120pts

QB – Drew Brees = 30pts
RB – Thomas Jones = 4pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
TE – Dallas Clark = 5pts
Flex – Miles Austin = 3pts
K – Nate Kaeding = 2pts

FredMS = 115pts

QB – Peyton Manning = 24pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
WR – Robert Meachem = 0pts
TE – Jason Witten = 9pts
D/ST- New York Jets = 5pts

Russ the Bus = 169pts

RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
RB – LaDanian Tomlinson = 2pts
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
WR – Percy Harvin = 0pts
TE – Jason Witten = 9pts
D/ST- Minnesota Vikings = 12pts

dat520 = 112pts

QB – Drew Brees = 30pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
WR – Reggie Wayne = 12pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts

Rob = 136pts

QB – Phillip Rivers = 27pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
WR – Marques Colston = 14pts
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
TE – Jason Witten = 9pts

StookieBrother1 = 124pts

QB – Tony Romo = 24pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
WR – Reggie Wayne = 12pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
FLEX – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
D/ST – Dallas Cowboys = 3pts

LM = 140pts

RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
FLEX – Dallas Clark = 5pts
D/ST – Arizona Cardinals = 0pts

JaiSlayer = 92pts

QB – Peyton Manning = 24pts
RB – Thomas Jones = 4pts
RB – Marion Barber = 0pts
WR – Marques Colston = 14pts
WR – Derrick Mason = 6pts
FLEX – Antonio Gates = 9pts
K – Ryan Longwell = 10pts
D/ST – New York Jets = 5pts

Smell Deez = 155pts

QB – Peyton Manning = 24pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
WR – Miles Austin = 3pts
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
FLEX – Thomas Jones = 4pts
K – Garrett Hartley = 10pts
D/ST – Indianapolis Colts = 8pts

Polotron = 157pts

QB – Peyton Manning = 24pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
WR – Miles Austin = 3pts
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
FLEX – Thomas Jones = 4pts
K – Garrett Hartley = 10pts
D/ST – Dallas Cowboys = 3pts

Amadeo = 108pts

QB – Phillip Rivers = 27pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
WR – Sidney Rice = 32pts
TE – Jason Witten = 2pts
FLEX – Dallas Clark = 5pts

Quimby = 92pts

QB – Peyton Manning = 24pts
RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
RB – Reggie Bush = 22pts
TE – Jason Witten = 2pts
K – Nate Kaeding = 2pts
D/ST- Minnesota Vikings = 12pts

getthesenets = 137pts

RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
WR – Robert Meacham = 0pts
WR – Vincent Jackson = 11pts
TE – Visanthe Shiancoe = 7pts
FLEX- Larry Fitzgerald = 7pts
K – Matt Stover = 9pts

cocotaso = 83pts

QB – Brett Favre = 35pts
RB – Marion Barber = 0pts
WR – Reggie Wayne = 12pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 9pts
FLEX – Jeremy Shockey = 9pts
D/ST – New York Jets = 5pts

wmarv = 133pts

RB – Adrian Peterson = 8pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
WR – Reggie Wayne = 12pts
FLEX – Miles Austin = 3pts
K – Jay Feely = 6pts
D/ST – New Orleans Saints = 9pts

RTHSTN = 174pts

QB – Peyton Manning = 24pts
RB – Reggie Bush = 22pts
RB – Ray Rice = 12pts
WR – Miles Austin = 3pts
WR – Sidney Rice = 32pts
FLEX – Thomas Jones = 4pts
D/ST – Dallas Cowboys = 3pts

Posted in No Boutros Boutros... Ghali, Not For Long, Sports are Gay | 15 Comments »

Nothing But Nyet…

Friday, January 15th, 2010

bjayz

“Dayyyyum, these Nets sux!”

What a piss poor franchise the Nets have become. The Kentucky Wildcats, Kansas Jayhawks, Texas Longhorns and a host of NCAA Division-1 teams would pwn these losers. And this is the franchise that they want to relocate to Brooklyn?

The Brooklyn deal is reportedly short some bucks right now, but supposedly this Russian dude with wild billions is gonna save the project.

I vote ‘NYET’ to Moscow on Atlantic Avenue. If the developer Bruce Ratner were a smart man he would simply nix the arena deal put some other shit in that empty space. Maybe Wal-Mart? Maybe affordable office space? Brooklyn certain has enough places to shop. What the boro needs is places for her residents to work and be trained with skills that would allow people to work on their own shit. If there is a place in New York where the hipster ideal has proven to be a sustainable way of life Brooklyn is the place.

bjayz

Hopefully then Mayor Bloomberg and Jay-Z won’t have to take silly pictures holding those crappy jerseys and simply allow the Nyets to remain playing their home games in crappy New Jersey.

You know what I just thought of? If Mayor Bloomberg and Jay-Z formed a rap group they could call themselves the B-Jayz [ll].

Posted in BeYONCE's Hair, C.R.E.A.M., Crappers, No Boutros Boutros... Ghali, Sports are Gay, T.O.N.Y., Talking Shit, Wig Owners | 22 Comments »

Jets’ Defense Is All Gas’d Up….

Thursday, January 14th, 2010

gas

^ Put THIS Mark in the Hall Of Fame!

The New York Jets head coach REX RYAN is the most refreshing postgame interview since Dennis Green was a head coach. The Jets are going to have to show up bigtime for their contest against the San Diego Chargers this weekend. If they get merc’ked by the white hot Chargers Rex Ryan will look like a fool.

I was wondering if the Jets had called in one of their former defensive stars to give the team a pregame pep talk. Mark Gastineau was one of the most exciting and enigmatic characters to ever play professional football. That was saying a lot too considering the fact that there was another special player on the other side of the Hudson River in Lawrence Taylor.

Gastineau played alongside several great players on the Jets defensive line, namely Hall Of Fame defensive tackle Joe Klecko. This allowed Gastineau to excel at pass rushing from the end position [ll]. What drove everyone crazy about Mark Gastineau was the excessive celebration that he performed whenever he tackled a quarterback or running back behind the line of scrimmage.

Mark Gastineau had this routine called a ‘Sack Dance’ and it was just some frenetic, random celebration that had no rhyme or reason. The Gastineau celebration was at its most ridiculous on third and long plays when the opposing offense would be forced to punt the ball afterwards. The NFL had to sack his dance after a melee erupted when Gastineau performed his dance after beating HOF tackle Jackie Slater.

I think Gastineau would be a great motivational speaker to this Jets team to remind them that the future is now and to play every down with reckless abandon. And a big goofy smile.

Posted in Fanboy Ish, Hollyweird, No Boutros Boutros... Ghali, Not For Long, Sports are Gay, T.O.N.Y., When I Reminisce..., Wig Owners | 34 Comments »

Even The Kid Sipped The Juice…

Tuesday, January 12th, 2010

the kid

Let me state this clearly for anyone reading this drop…

Ken Griffey Jr. is my favorite all-time player. He was my generation’s G.O.A.T. Honestly, Barry Bonds was my generation’s G.O.A.T., but I could never get close to Bonds. He played in the National League throughout his whole career and I could never get Bonds to sign shit for me. Back in the days I used to troll the press gate at the OG Shea Stadium because that is where the visiting team would enter the ballpark. Even before Barry Bonds had become the single season home run champ he was hard to touch.

I don’t favor Griffey Jr. over Bonds because I couldn’t get Bonds to autograph some shit for me. I fuxed with Griffey because his style was so much fresher than anyone else in the game. His swing was so gorgeous and elliptical. Most big hitters yanked the baseball after making contact with it while Griffey Jr. just seemed to let the ball go in any direction but always on a line. The only thing better than watching Griffey bat was watching him play centerfield. He made some of the most incredible catches I had ever seen. As a routine…

Now here comes the tough part. I think that Griffey Jr. tried to use steroids but his body rejected them and this is what caused his debilitating injuries. I feel like Griffey learned about steroids while with the Mariners. There are several Mariners players I’m sure were users who prA’li influenced Griffey.

juicers

Bret Boone, Jay Buhner, Edgar Martinez and Vince Coleman are all players I suspect of using HGH or steroids during their playing careers. They were all lean players who ballooned into bulky hulks during the 1990s. I don’t want this to become a scary witchhunt for which players may have used steroids in the days before baseball had outlawed these drugs and treatments. These players also knew of the risks that were inherent in receiving these treatments but just like the NFL stands for ‘Not For Long’ and those players willingly accept the negative side effects of steroids so did the baseball players.

The potential from steroids was something that trumped jaundice, prostate cancer and even bone density decomposition. The potential from steroids use appeared to be immortality. A chance at the Hall of Fame is what allows players to retire comfortably. For fifteen years that the the top tier pros remain in their sport some have twice that amount of time selling their signatures as Hall of Fame players. I love baseball and I don’t hold a grudge against any of these players for sipping the ambrosia of immortality. Maybe Barry Bonds will let me get his autograph one of these days.

the kid

Posted in Beisbol, C.R.E.A.M., Fanboy Ish, No Boutros Boutros... Ghali, Sports are Gay, Weird Science, Wig Owners | 23 Comments »

For The Love Of Money…

Tuesday, January 12th, 2010

mcgwire

Mark McGwire finally confessed to using steroids, but NOT human growth hormones. Who the fux really cares? EVERYONE that was anyone was doping in bigtime sports for at least the past twenty years. How else does a top level Olympiad champion like Florence Griffith Joyner have a heart attack in her 40’s? Or another pro baseball slugger, Ken Caminiti, also suffer from a heart attack only a few years after retirement. The truth is that most sports fans don’t give a shit whether their team’s top player uses steroids or cocaine or Advil-coated Tic Tacs. We just want our favorite teams to win.

McGwire’s confession doesn’t make him any more or less courageous than when he was an active player. He did it for the glory and the money. McGwire’s about to return to the game as a coach and he doesn’t want the spectre of his past to slow down his money machine. I don’t fault McGwire for getting his paper right. He’s got his weedcarrier Tony LaRussa maintaining the story that the Athletics and the Cardinals lockerrooms were all clean spaces. That’s a crock and Albert Pujols is now a steroid suspect in my book. The real crooks however are still the MLB owners.

The MLB owners made money hand over fist for the last twenty years from cable tv contracts, merchandising and licensing and of course ticjets sold at their ballparks. The owners pushed the players to destroy their bodies, but we still don’t discuss this on a mainstream level, only in the blogs is this idea even broached. If the owners were as contrite as they want the players to appear maybe they would give back some of the billions that they made over the last ten years. When it comes to sharing their money the MLB owners have nothing but love for the fans.

Nothing but love.

mcgwire

Posted in Beisbol, Black Bullshit, C.R.E.A.M., Fanboy Ish, No Boutros Boutros... Ghali, Sports are Gay, Wig Owners | 21 Comments »

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