Archive for the ‘C.R.E.A.M.’ Category

CARRION = DEAD MEAT…

Thursday, March 12th, 2009

roadkill

Has a politrickster ever had a more appropriate name as ADOLFO CARRION? The former Bronx Borough President and newly minted White House czar for urban policy hasn’t even had a chance to make his cabinet seat warm before we all find out that he is as crooked as anyone would be in the nation’s poorest urban area.

DP.com friends WWIB have been posting links to the Daily News and Village Voice investigative reports on CARRION’s cozy relationship with property developers and even architects that were granted contracts on capital construction projects in the Bronx. I’d hate to think how much other stuff is dangling around from CARRION’s time as BX BeeP. This is why the Bronx has remained disenfranchised, underserved and poor.

It’s too easy for funds to go missing when large sums are being moved around. The Bronx has required so much remedial development to bridge the gap from decades of negligence and irresponsibility. CARRION is just the tip of the iceberg for this boro’s woes. His conflict of interest with a municipal architect is such chump change. There were billions of dollars being circulated through the Bronx as it became the final frontier for NYC’s gentrification.

Although CARRION escaped the Bronx just as the construction bubble was bursting he has found himself in a hornet’s nest down in the D.C. Beltway. If you remember BERNARD KERIK then you know that the microscopic laser ain’t no joke when it is trained on you. BERNARD KERIK went from flying high as a Ground Zero Hero to just being a grounded zero. OBAAMA might have to pull another Latino from somewhere else to sit in this cabinet seat. I wonder if ProperTalks knows of any responsible Mexicans on the westside?

* i.C. BONUS * i.C. BONUS * i.C. BONUS *

Did I ever tell you folks the story about our ‘Bodega’ video shaping public policy citywide? After getting wind of our video a certain billionaire mayor and teh ghey councilwoman put the Healthy Bodega Initiative on the frontburner so to speak. Chea!

Tastes Just Like Chichen Itza…

Wednesday, March 11th, 2009

b heads

If you think you are having a problem holding your breakfast down then maybe you can imagine what kind of problem these dudes might be having.

Mexico is on some serious beheading shit. I thought it was only the arabs and the Indonesians who went in all crazy for the head chopping. The French had that whole guillotine movement a couple of hundred years ago but that was ceremonial. These fools in Mexico is dead ass serious.

I still plan on going to Cancun this summer though.

Did you know that there was so much money in moving drugs through Mexico? I need to ask my buddy from Tony’s Kansas City what the deal is with this. I would have thought that bringing drugs into America from South America was far more cost effective on airplanes and large shipping container vessels. How else do you flood an entire nation with narcotics unless you bring in kilotons of the shit. Maybe Mexico has the refineries and the processing plants? That cocoa leaf and poppy seed have to be processed somewhere don’t they?

In my mind, Del Monte or Kraftfoods has the factories that refine raw organic materials into narcotics for the American market. Who else has the facilities built to undertake this shit? Whenever I see an enterprise that generates a million billion trillion dollars I understand that white isn’t going to just let that operation lumber along. There is a global recession going down and if the drug trade wasn’t regulated previously (grow up people) it certainly is now. I don’t mean legislative regulation either. I mean that Warren G type regulation with guns, rocket launchers, tanks and planes type shit.

But on the real, the Mexicans need to stop fucking around with all this beheading shit. Just kill a motherfucker and keep it moving. Leave something for the wild dingoes in Mexico City.

The Last American Virgin…

Tuesday, March 10th, 2009

virgin stores

The immaculate consumption is coming to an end.

Don’t you folks feel a little nervous about the news that there won’t be any more virgin stores here in the U.S.?

The main reason the terrorists hate us is because we have virgin stores where we buy our virgins. People living in Arabia and other places usually have to undergo a horrific death in order to get to see some virgins.

We’ll be losing more than just a retail outlet when the virgins stores are shuttered later this year. We’ll be losing a place for virgins, as well as nerds, geeks, dweebs and freaks to commune in their all black gothic gear or their multi-colored skinny jeans.

Where will all the virgins with pierced lower lips and tattoo sleeves get together to listen to Kings Of Leon? BTW, copp that!

So much of our identity as Americans is wrapped up around our consumption of the things that entertain us. I’m lucky enough to live in an area where I can go to a huge library or museum or even an off-Broadway performance to satisfy my need to commune with others, but for those of you living in regions that are lacking the cultural communal options that I have you may just be forced to following the arabic method of getting yourself next to some virgins.

In America, the big box store is our temple of consume, our mosque to marketing, our church of cha-ching.

The mall is our cathedral to commerce.

Fuck you sons of BERNARD MADOFF for snitching on the golden calf.

The i.C.’s Mean Business…

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

gutty professor

If you wanted to support the i.C.’s t-shirt movement but you didn’t want to get on the PayPal grid now is your chance to help us pay our light bills and you may even get yourself into our latest video project.

On Saturday March 7th @ 3pm the iNternets Celebrities will be on location at the north end of Union Square Park. East 17th Street and Broadway are the coordinates for those of you out-of-townies. We will have a table set up with t-shirts and DVD’s for your consumption. No sales tax, no shipping costs, no bullshit.

And if any of you have an extra pair of pants…

Our director has a pants problem.

The Black Athlete’s Burden…

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

terrell


Well I hope you are happy
?

I hope you have what you want?

TERRELL OWENS brought some of this ignominy on himself as well, but isn’t that always the case when an athlete steps outside of the box? The NFL in particular is quick to use their media lackeys to posit the outspoken and competitiive star player as someone who lacks the concept of putting the team first. RANDY MOSS caught this characterization previously, ANQUAN BOLDIN and PLAXICO BURRESS more recently.

I’m certainly not defending any of these dudes actions off the field either, but where was the outcry when BRETT FARVE held the Green Bay Packers contractually hostage?

I don’t care if T.O. has a monster season wherever he ends up playing because he won’t be in a Cowboys’ uniform. I’m mad that the owners made this decision to appease a ravenous, bloodthirsty press corps. Or they did it to satisfy the morning drive-in radio listener who thinks he could be a general manager but views the sports landscape from the prism of the 1950’s prior free agency. I wonder what JACKIE ROBINSON would have said if free agncy was available to him?

He would have said nothing, if he were smart.