Archive for the ‘Fashion Faux Pas’ Category

NAS x KELIS = SO FIVE MINUTES AGO…

Tuesday, September 26th, 2006

kelis nas

The NAS and KELIS music video for ‘Blindfold Me’ looks like their amatuer homemade BDSM sex tape. It bored me. I can’t imagine that the same song and performance from BeYONCE and JAY-Z would be as boring, and NAS and KELIS actually have sex with one another. KELIS is a hot little piece of azz now that she has reaquainted herself with a hot comb. She sings like shit though. Why do we even categorize KELIS as a singer?

The video has her in a bunch of tight little latex outfits waiting to get domestically abused by her husband. I was hoping that NAS would do some choking torture routine and accidentally snap KELIS’ neck and then NAS would go to jail for murder and then he would finally make an album as good as ‘Illmatic’ was, but by the time he was released from jail no one would be listening to Hip-Hop anymore because the T.I.’s would be promoting Japanese punk rap rock and then NAS would have been sorry for living a life of musical mediocrity and losing the one woman in his life that wasn’t a complete whoare.

Now that would be a good video.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHE-HULK!

Tuesday, September 26th, 2006

she hulk

My muscular baby mama turns 25 today.

I just wish I could see her in her birthday suit.

serena

SEPARATED AT BIRTH: POETIC JUSTICE

Monday, September 25th, 2006

janet

After this I’ma leave JANET alone for like a week…

COOLIE COONERY

Sunday, September 24th, 2006

bollywood bling

I don’t care too much for Indian broads. Not the POCAHONTAS type, which I like, but the red dot forehead type. They’re rederkulously hairy and they have the strongest pheromone musk I have ever smelled. By not liking Indian women I conversely don’t enjoy Indian cuisine either. I typically don’t mess with Indian food because it runs through me faster than the Amtrak Acela express non-stop from D.C. to NYC. All this to say that I am prah’lee missing a glorious alternate universe to the African American minstrel like entertainment coming from Viacom.

Then again, the Old Earth always said to be careful what you pray for, you just may get it.



YouTube link via byroncrawford.com

SEPARATED AT BIRTH: SLICKBACK McCHEESE

Sunday, September 24th, 2006

lawn jeezy

The original Mayor SLICKBACK McCHEESE practicing his form.