Archive for the ‘Fashion Faux Pas’ Category

SNEAKER FIENDS UNITE!

Saturday, June 10th, 2006

italian comic

NIKE is a fucking beast. Just when you think that you have a moment to breathe they put their foot back on your throat with some sick new shit. NIKE has created a package of shoes to match up with one of Marvel comics greatest superhero teams – The FANTASTIC FOUR.

italian comic

The Fantastic Four were a group of astronaut scientists that went for a joy ride through some cosmic radiation. Their DNA became altered and when they returned to Earth they found that each of them had acquired some type of super power. The leader, Mister Fantastic had gained the ability to stretch his body into almost any shape. Ben Grimm, turned into a rock like creature called the Thing. Guess what powers the Invisible Girl ande the Human Torch had. The arch enemy of the Fantastic Four was Viktor Von Doom, better known as Doctor Doom. The Fantastic Four is Marvel Comics longest running series and I think they deserved a series of sneakers from my favorite brand.

human torch

THE HUMAN TORCH – AIR MAX ’95
How sick are these?!? NIKE premium leather in a fiery colorway. The Human Torch was a favorite of the ladies and I don’t see why any lady wouldn’t want to rock these joints.

invisible girl

THE INVISIBLE GIRL – AIR FORCE 1
Clear upper?!? Get your mind right and recognize that NIKE can’t be touched. How you gonna fuck with them when you can’t even see them?

thing

THE THING – DUNK HI
Premium leather all around, these are also the most available shoes in the series, going out as a general release to almost all NIKE accounts. I am a Dunk fan from forever so I am on the fence right now about copping these joints or digging a little deeper to come up on these…

senor fantastico

MISTER FANTASTIC – AIR MAX ’90
I love the Air Max products because they are the most comfortable and stylish shoes from the Swoosh brand. I will be honest and say that I wanted a little more blue accent to be placed on this product for BLU CHEEZ’ tastes (you know he loves that shit). I will have to see what these joints look like with cheesy laces.

senor fantastico

senor fantastico

senor fantastico

MEXICANS GONE WILD!!!

Friday, June 9th, 2006

sidekick

I suggest you people hold on to your SideKicks if you are visiting New York City this weekend.  For two days every year in June the city is turned over to roving mobs of Puerto Rican Mexicans as they parade and celebrate their home island’s existance as the last remaining American colony.

This means that come rain or shine there will be modified Honda Civics with flags draped on their hoods and less clothing material per square inch of ass area than the Bahamas.  Since I love crowds and since I have a predilection for groping anonymous strangers I should have some decent photos to upload by the end of the weekend.

SEPARATED AT BIRTH: THIS or THAT

Thursday, June 8th, 2006

choices

My ace entertainment reporter who steals all of our celeb pics from CONCRETE LOOP sent me a picture of JANET from the CFDA gala the other evening. I didn’t see any pics of her lawn jockey and I know ol’ boy was in town carrying her weed. You don’t want to have a newly svelte MISS JACKSON out on the town stag because she is known to double up.

In circumspect I guess that’s why we created two possible S.A.B. graphics. I couldn’t decide which one to roll with so I am asking you good folks which one you prefer. All the voters that are part of the DP.com ‘snail mail’ list will receive a DVD of my choice this week. If you aren’t part of the ‘snail mail’ list then you better ask somebody.

you can get with this…
harley quinn

or you can get with that
marionette

SNEAKER FIENDS UNITE!

Wednesday, June 7th, 2006

blu cheez

Awwww ish! Guess who is still the flyest bear on these internets? That nigga BLU CHEEZ is fool! So holler at a player when you see one in the streets.

blu cheezys

Aint nobody dope as CHEEZ, he dress so fresh and so clean

blu cheezys

(so fresh and so clean-clean)

blucheezys

Dont you find CHEEZ so sexy, he dress so fresh and so clean

blucheezys

(so fresh and so clean-clean)

blu cheezys

I love when you stare at CHEEZ, he dress so fresh so clean

blucheezys

(so fresh and so clean-clean)

BILLY SUNDAY Says Pink Hats Are For Broads

Friday, June 2nd, 2006

Summertime almost snuck up on us without me giving you the official dallaspenn.com fitted hat lineup for the season. If you can still afford the prices of these caps then peep some of my choices for the summers’ most ubiquitous B-boy accessory.

Speaking of ubiquitous…
evil empire

Love ‘em or hate ‘em you have to respect the gangsta of the MLB’s evil empire. The only one you should own is the classic though. A pink Yankees fitted should only be worn by members of the camouflage lingerie mafia.

spankees

Otherwise known as DipSet.

The Sneaker Fiends M.V.P. this season will be the all-black Giants chapeau. The 3-D ‘SF’ on the front should become the logo for sneaker fiends across America. No orange button on the crown if you can find one that exclusive.

sneaker fiend

Another classic that stays fresh in the streets is the St.Louis joint. The best part is that you can rock this joint Blood or Crip style too.

redbirds

bluebirds

I am partial to wearing a Tribe hat because I always dug ATCQ’s jazzy sound and I got some in’jun in my family genes. Just think, one day when the African American population is decimated from disease, drugs and alcohol maybe we can get our own hat too.

in'juns

Well what do you know?!? We already got one. Woo hoo! Go Niggros!

chattanooga lookouts

I am in a New York state of mind this summer so I will definitely copp one of these Met I.T.’s. Being the boss of the National League East should have some benefits.

mets

The most important thing to remember about your fitted cap is that it should fit. If you can still shove another skull inside of your cap then your hat isn’t ‘fitted’. It is actually a bonnet.