Archive for the ‘iNternets Celebrities’ Category

Mountain Dew Goes Ultra Violet…

Sunday, August 9th, 2009

md uv zc

So we all know that I fux with the Mountain Dew blue (Voltage) totally. I’m sure I’ll be dead from heart disease on my own before I have to deal with any adverse effects of a HFCS sweetened aqua-marine colored cola. If you haven’t tried MTN DEW blue you seriously have no idea what you are missing. What? You planning on living forever? Fuck that shit. I’m living today.

After several impassioned YouTube clips and a little politicking from HowFresh to the folks that market Mountain Dew I was given an invite to taste the newest MTN DEW at some funky obama with free food. I wasn’t sure how the set up would work out so I put a call in to my young homey from the TWitter – RLFNOWHERE. I asked fam to come through the event and hold the handycam for me while I talked that DP ish.

I owe HowFresh an apology because I didn’t think he was gonna push for me to get a word in with the whole PepsiCo. braintrust, but How is ultimately a man of his word. I’m not sure if I impressed on the marketers how serious I felt about their product or maybe I came across a little too fanatical. What can I say? My fanboy engine gets turned on and the next thing you know I am jumping through plate glass windows. Thank goodness there was no plate glass at this spot.

Mountain Dew rented out the swanky new Brooklyn Bowl in Williamsburg for the event. My biggest regret was not going in on the food hardbody. There were some crabcake appetizers that were for the win. I did get busy on the drinks though(naturally – natch) and I did beat HowFresh on the lanes so at least the Mets pwned the Yankees in that arena. The marketers sent us to this area where a MTN DEW technician taught us the how to make our own special Dew using their secret ingredients.

At the end of the day however the new diet Mountain Dew needs a shape up. First, the people at Pepsi need to kill the word ‘diet’ on their product. That shit is gheyer than a bag of dildos in RuPaul’s apartment. Whenever I see someone drinking a ‘diet’ soda I think that person would rather have a Tab or a penis in their mouth. My bad to anyone that like diet sodas. In my opinion the fact that this product is zero calories is enough of an attraction. What idiot doesn’t understand that zero cals means no sugar?

The marketers should have called this product MD UV ZC. That’s DP’s urban shorthand for Moutian Dew UltraViolet Zero Calories. How hot would that be? I still get the energy (read: caffeine) of a regular MTN DEW product but now their isn’t any sugar to push my blood insulin count out the roof. Sounds like a win for the kid if you ask me. The Mountain Dew UltraViolet flavor is being released with a limited run starting this week so if you see a bottle pick one up and try it out. If you don’t like it I will mail you a refund.

No, really.

The clip above was taken when the MTN DEW camera got at me.

Here’s the clip we made without the bigtime flashing lights…

ESSO – ‘Don’t Stop’…

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

esso

Way before MICHAEL JACKSON was given that Jesus dosage of painkiller pills the homey ESSO told me of his upcoming project to celebrate the 30th year anniversary of MJ’s ‘Off The Wall’ album. I thought the concept was dope and like everyone else I loved MICHAEL JACKSON’s work.

ESSO’s previous project ‘Lifestyles of the Young and Ignorant’ had some internets buzz and it had a couple of tracks that I fux with but this is the project that I was waiting for. The first single and video from the new ESSO mixtape is ‘Don’t Stop’. Support this young brother and his independent art.

TONY STARKS IS IRON MAN…

Friday, July 31st, 2009

ironman

I might be one of the luckiest dudes in the world. I didn’t have a ticket to the Ghostface + Red / Meth show going down here in NYC and it didn’t look good for me to come up on one either. I wanted to get into the 88 Keys, Asher Roth, Kid Cudi show at the same location and when I put my desires out there on the internets I only heard the sound of crickets. I reached out to Asher’s people and they didn’t have a single ticket for the kid either. There was no way I was gonna be able to finagle my way into this concert, especially since the industry has been buzzing about Raekwon and everyone knew he was in town and would cameo at this event.

Lo and behold, CARL CHERY hit me up on my new Blackberry and told me that he could hold me down for the show. Let me say this right here, CARL is a good dude, nullus. I didn’t really know fam from any of these other young industry cats when he came and took over from Eskay at the X-spot, and we kind of got familiar [ll] at some open bar industry party in a sneaker store. You never know though what people are about at those parties since everyone is drunk and looking to bag up something that smells good. The proof to me that CARL was the truth is when I wanted to quit the X-spot after I visited my sick mom in Atlanta.

Instead of letting me go off on my way son kept hitting me on the e-mail and the cellphone telling me that the slot here at the X-spot was gonna stay open for if and when I wanted to get back on the grizzly. Any other dude in this industry would have said fuck it, especially since CARL and I don’t have any history in the first place. He had no reason to be loyal to me other than the fact that he was just that type of person. I hope this guy gets all the rewards this business has waiting for him because 99.9% of the people you encounter in the industry are shitbags or junkies. Myself included. You don’t ever come across real dudes often enough so I salute that dude CARL CHERY.

ironman

Tony Starks is one of the last real emcees alive. It has to be the situations that the Wu encountered when they first came out that has made these brothers so damn resilient and so special. It’s more than their talent that makes the Wu-Tang Clan the greatest rap collective of all time. It is their integrity to Hip-Hop. That might sound lofty and ridiculous but the Wu Tang never traded their popularity away for silly shit like clothing lines or liquor sponsorships. Yes asshats, I remember the Wu Wear brand, but that wasn’t being promoted by a single Wu artist as “their” clothing line. I’m talking about the silly shit that rappers do now to become entertainment company presidents and CEO’s and dungarees models. GTFOH!

The concert last night didn’t disappoint me. Redman and Method Man were the shit, but Ghostface tore the house down with the Raekwon cameo. Them two niggas is the peanut butter and jelly of rap music. You can grow up off their music. If I’ve seen anyone in the Wu perform the most it would have to be Ghost. He gets it in [ll] in all kinds of weather. Hardbody. From sneaker pimps shows to free ass outdoor festivals in Brooklyn. I would bet you any amount of money that Ghost would do a set for a senior citizen home. Thirty years from now that could be a reality too. It will be Ghost and his grandchildren opening up for some robots and extraterrestrials. Tony Starks G is still that futuristic.

ironman

Red Carpet Diaries…

Friday, July 31st, 2009

iac

I stood on the red carpet last night for RIK CORDERO’s new film ‘Inside A Change‘.

RIK continues to open lanes up for all of us ‘little camera’ directors.

The premiere was down the block from the Dallas BBQ on 23rd Street. While I was on my way to the Ghost + Red/Meth show I ran into B.Dot from RapRadar. B was like, “What’s good with your boy?” I told him it wasn’t no stab at their movement and B was like, “If I called some shit Nah Wrong or Dallas Pencil would that be 100?” B was right that would be wack, but RapGaydar isn’t gonna go pop. RapRadar is def safe from that angle.

In my mind the biggest problem for RapRadar was that government weather tracking site run by the Center for Atmospheric Research that always appeared at the top of the Google search. Now that ELLIOTT WILSON’s RapRadar has a higher Google rank than the O.G. RAP radar I can only see sunny skies in their forecast.

Putting The Pee In Politricks…

Thursday, July 30th, 2009

pee

^ Only in Africa could this beverage be better than water.

Yo, on the reals…

Eff the two douchebags visiting the president to come up on free beers. Neither of those dudes, Professor Gates or Sargeant Jim Crow deserve the honor. They are both douchebag bigots. Here’s my TWitter thread from 5am…

“Obama is a swagger jacker. I started the internets popularity of BYOB BBQ’s. Now Obama has a Bring Your Own Bigot beer party. Biter.”

“The cop is an authoritarian bigot. He thinks everyone should kneel down to police badge and gun [ll]. PrA’li a fag.”

“The professor is an intellectual bigot. He thinks everyone should respect his degrees and academic shit.”

“And let’s be absolutely 100 percent clear on this one fact. The professor and the police officer BOTH hate the SAME Blacks.”

“Lets not think that race doesn’t have a pretext in the discussion however. Most of us don’t get hung up on that issue though primarily.”

“Both parties were dewshs for different reasons. One, because he had a gun and the other because his uzi weighs a ton.”

“Lastly, their choices of beer sucked the ass that dewshbaggs only know how to suck. No Heinekin Darks or Negro Modelos for these asshats?”

pee