Archive for the ‘white’ Category

DP.COM CRISPUS ATTUCKS’ WEEK CONTINUES…

Wednesday, March 4th, 2009

crispus

Regrettfully…

The sad PU~ that is now known as CRISPUS ATTUCKS’ week has claimed more lives.

Not For Long players COREY SMITH and MARQUIS COOPER are missing off the Florida coast after a “boating” trip with friends went awry.

The lone survivor, NICK SCHUYLER, was the owner of the capsized boat.

After my ancestors arrived here during their mandatory cruise I have been leery of boats large and small. What is the point of going somewhere by boat? This is what highways are for. And airports. I don’t even like to take the ferry trip to Staten Island. Black people should stay out of the water in general. Nothing but well chlorinated pools for me.

White loves the water. Surfing, diving, fishing, and just all around boating are activities that beckon white. I don’t care for none of that shit. Okay, true story is that I love snorkeling, but even then I am on the lookout for sharks. And when I go snorkeling I make sure there are enough Blacks in my group that I can get out of the way in case Jaws comes through.

Black people, stay the fuck out of the water and decrease the chances of you getting your ass CRISPUS ATTUCKS’d.

That shit would be some str8 PU~.

DP.COM CRISPUS ATTUCKS WEEK…

Monday, March 2nd, 2009

crispus

Combat Jack, Marvelous Mo and myself have been spending a lot of time together as of late. Part of the reason was that we were courting the notion of forming an internets collective that did more than just maintained weblogs of our exploits and aspirations. While spending time together this weekend Combat Jack reminded us of the cautionary tale of CRISPUS ATTUCKS.

Many of you may not know this but CRISPUS ATTUCKS was the first person killed in the Revolutionary War. ATTUCKS was also a Black man. That he is generally the only name most people remember when queried about the so-called ‘Boston Massacre‘ says that ATTUCKS was surely a pioneer, but a pioneer of what you might ask? CRISPUS ATTUCKS has pioneered a long line of Africans in America who have gotten their shit fucked the fuck up because they were fucking around with the white.

If ATTUCKS has just minded his damn business he might still be alive. Not today, because that would be crazy, but back then instead of getting his wig peeled back via musket which had to be some bullshit compared to the arms we are now shipping overseas to Israel and the like that simply just decapitate babies. There are surfers, scuba divers, skateboarders, astronauts, and captains of industry who all have CRISPUS ATTUCKS to thank for inspiring them to jump out the window with the white.

With the two hundred and thirty-ninth anniversary of CRISPUS ATTUCKS demise approaching this Thursday I thought I should highlight one of his successors, the first African America surfer, NICOLAS RONALDO GABALDON.

crispus

NICK RONALDO GABALDON(1927-1951) started his famous surfing career on a piece of rescued flatwood at the Inkwell beach that was south of Santa Monica’s fabled Malibu beachfront.

In those days the beaches of Southern California were segregated just like the lunch counters in Selma, Alabama. This didn’t stop the young Blacks from coming to the water however and even imitating the activities of the white they witnessed on the northern stretches of the coast.

NICK was a tall, slim handsome man who was highly athletic and was even reported to have known how to swim, but this is disputed by many historians who agree that no African American has proven they have the ability to swim since they don’t pwn that category in the Summer Olympics.

NICK befriended some of the great surfers of that period like BOBBY HOGAN and MICKEY MUNOZ. Even the legendary Malibu Beach lifeguard PRESTON ‘PETE’ PETERSON considered GABALDON a friend. After a stint in the Navy GABALDON returned to the beaches of SoCal, and returned to the surfing lifestyle that he so loved.

Sadly, it would be the forbidden dance of the white atop seasoned balsa wood that would do NICK in.

A major swell in early June with waves over a story high was pounding the the Malibu coast. Surfers from up and down Californ-I-A came to hang ten and break waves. NICK was said to have taken out a brand new handshaped shortboard for the occasion. He found a monster wave too and deftly hugged the crest as if he were a white.

Alas, for all of his good hair and Polynesian good looks NICOLAS GABALDON was not a white. He disappeared in the swell, his shortboard shattered against the Malibu piers, his body was not to be recovered for several days.

In 2008, the Santa Monica city council unveiled a commemorative plaque at Inkwell beach in honor of NICK and his achievements as the first African American surfer.

If there are any lessons to be learned from this drop it should be 1) Black history is American history and that shit happens all the fucking time, and 2) Black people, stop trying to do shit white does. It will get your shit fucked the fuck up.

crispus

Do The Right Thing 2nite!

Thursday, February 26th, 2009

do the right thing

I remember when SPIKE LEE’s ‘Do The Right Thing’ was premiering twenty years ago. The supremacy apologist New York Times claimed that this movie was going to incite race riots across the city. As a supremacy bellwether, the NYTimes was trying to forecast the reaction to the disillusionment of justice Black felt towards the Yusuf Hawkins case. Little did we know at that moment, but the NYTimes was a co-conspirator in placing the five(5) innocent youth in prison for the infamous “Central Park jogger” case.

New York City still suffers from racism as do most metropolitan areas but now in the year 2009 it has become more clear to some that the real enemy was always the person behind the curtain pulling the strings. SPIKE LEE isn’t feared or reviled in Hollywood any longer. Even the band Public Enemy is viewed with whimsical nostalgia. What we thought was bad under the first Bush presidency we found was exponentially worse under the second Bush administration. And with that perspective lens I will view tonight’s screening of ‘Do The Right Thing’.

ImageNation Cinema Foundation proudly announces its 5th annual collaboration with Lincoln Center for the Performing Arts to present ImageNation at Lincoln Center: A 20th Anniversary Celebration of “Do the Right Thing” with Spike Lee.

Sponsored by BET and our venue host, Lincoln Center for the Performing Arts, this Black History Month event will take place on Thursday, February 26, 2009 in Lincoln Center’s Walter Reade Theater and will include a rock rendition of “Fight The Power” performed live by Chuck D and Apollo Heights, a screening of the Academy Award nominated film and discussion with members of the cast and crew, which will be moderated by actor/playwright Stew of the Tony Award-winning musical “Passing Strange”.

Where & When
Thurs. February 26th
@ Lincoln Center’s Walter Reade Theater
70 Lincoln Center Plaza 165 West 65th St.

Reception: 6pm
Program: 7pm

For more information about ImageNation please visit the link

Eastbound & Down For The Count…

Tuesday, February 10th, 2009

eb & d

How do you have a show called Eastbound & Down and you DON’T play the anthem for trucker trash culture? That’s a fail off the bat.

The second strike is all this hype about a baseball sitcom and then NO baseball. What is the deal with that?

The third strike was the writing which might have been on strike at the time. You are fucking out Eastbound & Down.

The good thing for you guys is that there are nine innings.

The truth about television show premieres is that they are often less hit and more miss. Home Box Office however has a ridiculous track record for their original programming so you can expect at minimum a certain level of entertainment. Where their series ‘Flight of the Conchords’ is smart, and unassuming in its wit, ‘Eastbound & Down’ is predictable with its punchlines. I’m not saying thats a bad thing at all, but HBO has spoiled us rotten with quirky, hilarious shit like LARRY DAVID’s ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’. Its a little weird for me to find myself giving a shit about Kenny Powers who is the lead character in ‘Eastbound & Down’. CYE’s Larry made his selfishness and stupidity amusing. EB & D’s Kenny Powers is just grating.

The same people who brought us shit like ‘Talladega Nights’ and ‘Step Brothers’ along with the same actor who featured in ‘Tropic Thunder’ and ‘Pineapple Express’ have teamed up to give us nothing like the hot shit I just mentioned. Where ‘Eastbound & Down’ fails is that the writing seems to have been set up for a laugh track. Characters aren’t just one dimensional. Some are non-dimensional. And I can’t force myself to laugh at a holograph. The writers need to sit down and decide what they want to do with this character who is supposedly a former major league player of the highest caliber all the while being a cretin of the lowest possible moral fiber.

I’m not saying that it can’t work, but someone needs to come in and refine the show. DANNY McBRIDE is funny as the lead even though he is working with some cliche’d bits. The show should have dealt with his downward spiral from the majors. Kenny Powers should have been that guy that snorted cocaine off a stripper’s ass cheek. That is the outrageous the show needed as opposed to showing us a nude shot of McBride in the shower at the middle school his character is supposed to be teaching at. Nude shots and profanity are all golden when they are done right, but when they are done wrong, they are just gold-plated like the slum jewelry on Jamaica Avenue.

I’m going to give ‘Eastbound & Down’ at least one more shot because the creative team behind Funny Or Die has to still have some funny left inside of them. Also because my folks from Cornerstone Marketing make sure that I stay invited to shit that I love with no reservation. If ‘Eastbound & Down’ doesn’t make it to sweeps week (does cable even give a fuck about that shit?) don’t blame DP dot com. Blame the fact that JERRY REED’s theme song from ‘Smokey & The Bandit’ was nowhere to be heard.

RED BULL SNOWSCRAPERS – NYC

Thursday, February 5th, 2009

redbull

TODAY!

In the Lower East Side at the East River Park (WildStyle location)

16 of the world’s best snowboarders will compete for their piece of the massive $100,000 prize purse at Red Bull Snowscrapers. Athletes will compete against the majestic backdrop of the New York City skyline in the East River Park from 6-9 pm.

Athletes include iconic Olympic Gold Medalist Shaun White, freestyle / backcountry legend Travis Rice and ultra-progressive phenomenon Pat Moore. World renowned Burton riders for the ground-breaking event include Kevin Pearce, Mikkel Bang, Danny Davis, Kohei Kubo, Kazuhiro Kakubo, and snowboard legend Terje Haakonsen. Other confirmed riders include Nitro’s Andreas Wiig, DC’s Torstein Horgmo, Forum’s Jake Blauvelt and Greg Bretz, along with Rome rider Bjorn Leines and Ride’s JJ Thomas.

Event Schedule

3:00pm – Gates open to the public
3:30pm – Riders open practice – All 16 riders
5:05pm – Valient Thorr Performance
5:45pm – Red Bull Snowscrapers contest starts – 60 minute jam session
7:10pm – Black Gold Performance
7:45pm – Red Bull Snowscrapers Finals – Jam session – Top 8 riders
8:50pm – Awards
8:55pm – Anthrax Performance

Event Format

Red Bull Snowscrapers will utilize a jam session format for both the preliminaries and finals. In this format, a rider is neither dismissed nor defined by a single run or fall—rather, the athlete who consistently lands difficult and creative tricks with skill and style throughout the entire jam session is deemed the overall winner.