Archive for the ‘Lust = Love’ Category

R.I.P. BETTIE MAE PAGE

Saturday, December 13th, 2008

spank rock

BETTIE PAGE is part of the reason that some women make shitloads of cash doing pr0n. PAGE didn’t do pr0n though. All she did was expose the hypocrisy of our culture when we see the female form.

At least she didn’t die penniless like some bum on the street. She led a curious life because during the 1960’s she left the modeling business totally. PAGE only resurfaced during the last decade or so. She had been signing photos and memoribilia at conventions and the what not. PAGE was a little embarrassed at her fandom since she didn’t consider herself beautiful.

I hope some of you video ho’s out there say a quick prayer for your patron goddess.

Computer Love In Real Life…

Saturday, December 13th, 2008

aiko

I am a little jealous of this dude LE TRUNG. Instead of being like the rest of us fanboys who happily collect action figures and pose them for music videos LE decided to make his own action figure. A life size fem-bot named Aiko. He has programmed her to speak English as well as Japanese, which was a bit curious since dude is a Vietnamese cat living in Canada.

Whatever is clever is what my moms always said. This dude has effectively solved his virginity issues by making another virgin. However, he better not let homegirl watch any television and definitely no internets because she will leave his ass for sure.

That is, as soon as she is programmed to walk. Now I see this programming pimp’s angle. Aiko will never walk out on him if he never motorizes her legs. Talk about ‘Love Lockdown’?

I say he still better watch out though because if her heart walks out the door then it doesn’t matter if she stays. You don’t want to fucks with an android chick with a cold heart. That is some heartless shit (no ‘Ye Tudda).

aiko

aiko

^^^ LOLz at homeboy trying to cover up the chubby that Aiko is giving him.

aiko

LE TRUNG is the freak of the week as he takes Aiko all about the town to cosplay conventions and strolls in the park. The best part is this story is that dude is taking orders to build more of these joints.

DP = iLose 2win

Friday, December 12th, 2008

comye

You couldn’t tell me nothing last night at the Marc Ecko holiday party. Free Ketel-1 from heavy handed barkeeps and some of the coolest MF’s evar. All my folks was in effect, especially my laaaaaaaaydeeeeeez.

ANNA is the truth, but JEN is that ride or die Chi chick. She might be from the Chi, but she ain’t no way shy. Peace to CARL, HOBBS and J ‘Che Guerilla’. A lot of up and coming cats was stuntin’ hard too. I’m excited for this city in 2009. There is so much energy and creativity. Plus beauty. Creative types always need their muses.

I blew out of the Ecko joint while the drinks were still pouring because I had to get to this secret Common concert on the Lower East Side.

The spot was this re-purposed church. I went to a Hennessy art show there a few years ago and met this painter chick who hated my politics when I told her that KEVIN POWELL was a two-bit shoeshine hustler. There are now three people that Black women look up to like some fucking holy trinity. BARACK, OPRAH and KEVIN fucking POWELL. That nigga is having a party tonight in the city and I will guarantee you that it is filled with the baddest Black broads that could squeeze their feet into a pair of high heels.

Anyhoo, last night. I caught a few Common songs and the what not but I flew the coup before KanYe came out and did whatever he did. The day job is the gift and the curse. I could never pay the mortgage and the maintenance of my co-operative apartment with my internets lifestyle. I have to remind myself of this when I am sitting in a 9:30am jobsite meeting.

Geeked Out & Freaked Out…

Sunday, December 7th, 2008

stormtrooper wedges

Would my head explode like the Death Star if Chocolate Snowflake were to wear these ‘Stormtrooper’ wedge heels?

No.

But if she were to go to the lengths that this, er, lady went to fulfill her fanboy’s fantasies…

spotted at Gizmodo via Kontraband

WHO IS SASHA FIERCE?

Thursday, November 27th, 2008

beyonce

I just read an article about how BeYONCE needs to create an alter-ego in order for her to perform some of her more risque dance routines and pop tunes. I’ve called out BeYONCE previously for also employing this gimmick, despite the fact that I use a pen name to write my column at XXL .

What I knew, yet didn’t acknowledge is that the white hot glare of the public stare can become discomforting. Alter-egos are necessary personas when we have something to say that may offend some of the folks that we are close to, or we consider friends.

Some of my favorite (and not so much) artists have shifted through their alter-egos so deftly that you feel like you know them personally. REGGIE NOBLE has Redman, MARSHALL MATHERS has Eminem as well as Slim Shady and even T.I. has Tip and some dude named CLIFFORD who got pinched by the Feds for having a cache of undisclosed military weapons.

BeYONCE uses SASHA FIERCE though in a way that only these artists could dream of. While BeYONCE is determined to maintain a visage that will surely translate to gospel music the second her pop music career hit the skids she needs an outlet to sell her sexuality and her reedonkulous badonkey donk. BeYONCE is pimping… Herself.

beyonce

While Ms.KNOWLES (CARTER?!?) still attends missionary committee luncheons at the Mt. Carmel Baptist Church while SASHA FIERCE walks the streets at night to tease the boys with her milkshake. Only teasing is allowed though since the last time she was documented to have had relations she wound up pregnant in Houston.

BeYONCE has managed to do what no one before her could execute properly. She has removed sex from sexuality. It’s all just posing, shaking and strutting. There is no penetration. There is not even enough time for foreplay. At the end of the day this detachment is what may do her in. The pop music world had a chameleon that shifted shapes as often as she changed her hair color. That was Madonna.

But even Madonna got it in early in often. Who remembers the circular door that she had in her bedroom? You can’t get to the top and stay clean. You have to have some dirt under your nails. I’m not talking about the fake drunk episode either. I’m talking about real scandal. It is when she is brought to her knees that she will be embraced even more vigorously by the public. That is when she will transform from the robot into the human.

beyonce