Archive for the ‘Lust = Love’ Category

CAPTAIN BILLY SUNDAY’s PUPPY LOVE PODCAST

Thursday, March 13th, 2008

iPuppy

Do not take this internets shit too seriously. There is still some love out there to be found. Sometime you just have to turn around and look behind you. At the job, or on the train to work, or maybe even in the supermarket.

All this gubernatorial nonsense has made me forget why I come here in the first place. I want to see people in love with themselves [ll] and with their lives. And since this is Women’s History Month I want to do something special for the ladies. If you don’t mind I’d just like to make love to your earholes a lil’ bit.

To get you in the mood I have enlisted the help of five young brothers who just want to love you down.

RFTW
“Let me find out that is Eric Sermon on the lower right?!?”

Nahh, don’t get shit twisted by thinking that Ready For The World was on some teh ghey boy band bullshit. RTFW was from Flint, Michigan a/k/a Hardbody Hills and they are responsible for the births of many a Black kid in the midwestern region during the years 1982-1985. If you come from the ‘D’ then you already know.

How did these dudes have the young R & B scene on smash during the 80’s? They was cool with Prince. That makes them freaky too. RTFW is all about taking their time with that thing, playing with the knobs on the digital display and then Sheila better watch out. Just don’t let these fellas sit on your momma’s good cloth furniture. Them jheri curls will stain shit to death.


‘Tonight’


‘Deep’


‘Slide Over’


‘Digital Display’


‘Oh Sheila’

Ho’s Unite N.O.W.

Thursday, March 13th, 2008

spitzer ho

image links via FOBBDEEP

Aside from the NAACP, can you think of another progressive movement as ineffective as the National Organization for Women? Maybe they burned a few bras in the 1960’s, but what have they done for the bitches lately? If they wanted to get themselves back into the public conscious they would piggyback off the fame of the young woman in the eye of the storm of the latest tryst by the former New York state governor.

She calls herself ASHLEY ALEXANDRA DUPRE and her MySpace page has had more hits in 24 hours than the N.O.W. call center has had in two decades. There has got to be some P.R. chick working inside of the N.O.W. camp who could use this ho’s newfound fame to fasttrack their feminist agenda. This is the perfect storm.

What I mean to say is that it is Women’s History Month gottamitt! Now someone, anyone, step up and use this girl’s fame to get your issue on the streets. Where are the 2girls1cup people? They would know how to make a video out of this shit. How about this N.O.W. bitches? Did you know that 1 in 4 teenage girls has an STD? Tell me I’m lying. This is why I go for older ho’s anyhoo.

There are a set of reasons I think will ultimately benefit this girl. First is the fact that she appears to be a swarthy white. From a marketing aspect Black ho’s certainly don’t sell nationally (see Duke rape case), but when a white goes on the ho stroll you have a ‘Pretty Woman’.

spitzer ho

I’m not mad at the governor’s choice either. At 105 lbs. she is light enough for circus tricks and all sorts of good times. His good times are done for now, but ASHLEY’s have just begun. She is working on a music career and I’m sure she can get some burn on the reality show scene, but she is going to need good management with long-term vision. Those bitches from N.O.W. need to tap that ass as well. This could begin the movement to legalize prostitution. This could be major like that.

If nothing else this case at least gives us another episode of ‘Law & Order’.


Ashley Alexandra Dupré @ MySpace

spitzer ho

POLITRICKS 2008: ELIOT TRICKZER…

Wednesday, March 12th, 2008

trickster

The governor asks if he can just put the tip of his spin in…

Party people?

$80K?!?

Eighty stacks!?!?!

That my friends is called a crack habit. Asscrack, as it were.

I’m a little hurt for SPITZER’s wife who couldn’t be that emotionally obtuse could she? Nahh, but she played her position so that homeboy could become governor or president or chef at Cipriani. I feel bad for the daughters too, but they will have to use this shit to rise up and do some good from this. Maybe a home for wayward call girls.

I always liked sluts more than hos. Sluts will give it up for free. Free is love. Paying for shit is a bad move because it exploits the relationship and removes the love. If a female doesn’t want to have sex with someone she shouldn’t do it for any money. I’m not about to throw the girls under the bus with this being Women’s History Month and all, and I hate when someone calls prostitution the world’s oldest profession.

Women need to shut that talk down quickfast.

I’m sure the oldest profession was to keep from having your ass eaten by lions, and not on no tossed salad tip either. Think about this too. There had to be another job that paid someone enough money to go to a hooker in the first place. After you finished your day at the rock quarry and after paying child support for the baby caveman maybe then you could go get the club and have some fun. Which makes me wonder if that’s why Fred Flinstone cheated on Wilma with Betty Rubble?

flintstones

Despite himself, his craven selfishness, and his lust for power the governor has gone from being a real life caricature of Dudley Do Right into a real life human being. Flawed and pitiful.

Bigger than all that philosophical shit is the fact that the governor was on some super trick shit by going in on this racket for at least six years to the tune of eighty thousand dollars. He needs to resign now before we find out about all the sick shit that he was making this poor little rich girl do to him.

Dayum ELIOT!

80 G’s!

POLITRICKS 2008: Servicing Public Servants…

Tuesday, March 11th, 2008

pros

It’s a shame to me that I have to turn my thoughts away from my dysfunctional lust for sneakers to think about the dysfunctional lust of sneaky politicians.

If you haven’t heard or read the news already let me keep it simple. The New York governor, ELIOT SPITZER, was caught with his pants around his ankles, literally.

Shit is fucked the fuck up in the statehouse right now on several different levels. The steely public image of the governor is shattered. Mainly, because now there is this ironic hypocrisy factor. The governor came into office from the vantage point of a lawman who would shake the trees to vett out corruption and restore integrity to the governor’s mansion. SPITZER’s resume and reputation were unassailable. He had made his career on attacking the establishment and dismantling the entrenched, embedded old boy network from New York City to Albany.

This brought a lot of haters to SPITZER’s doorstep. Quiet as shit is kept I think that even people within the Democratric party were shook by SPITZER. His hard charging approach would turn over every stone and would stop at nothing, even if that meant throwing fellow party members under the bus. You have to walk easy once that becomes your reputation. I wouldn’t be one bit surprised if someone who had access to his ear set him up for this fall.

I certainly don’t excuse ELIOT SPITZER for his immoral actions, but they appear so sloppy and mismanaged I have to wonder who put this shit together. From his experience as the state attorney general, the governor knows how hot the phone lines are in these post-911 days. From his experience as the top state prosecutor he also knows about upscale escort services and how they operate. I’m not saying that he still wouldn’t avail himself of these services, but his movement should have been on some governor level shit.

This mess was hell’a sloppy like a KWAME KILPATRICK text message bundle. My opinion is that his own inner circle was infiltrated by the party machinery in order to remove him from office before he uncovered some big money shenanigans. Keep in mind that there is a culture of immorality that follows political power so believe that no one in elected office is vice free. I just think that ELIOT SPITZER had scared the shit out of a cabal of wealthy dudes and homeboy had to be given the political version of a ‘Ho Sit Down’.

Happy Women’s History Month…

Saturday, March 1st, 2008

sistas

Peep some video from the rapper Plies open casting call for his proposed reality show. I couldn’t even imagine something more janky than ‘Flavor of Love’, but then again I wasn’t giving women their due for Women’s History Month. How much do you want to bet me that some of these broads graduated from Spelman?

And ZORA NEALE HURSTON weeps in her unmarked grave…

YouTube link via Average Bro dot com