Archive for March, 2006

FOOLS RUSH IN (ReMix)

Thursday, March 23rd, 2006

the fools

First off, go out and copp the latest issue of F.E.D.S. Magazine. I wouldn’t normally give a shout to any of these crappy Hip-Hop rags because the writing is so garddamned wack, but this issue is near and dear to my heart. The mag has an interview with my brother BIG CY. He talks a little bit about the the formation of the collective that some haters like to refer to as a gang. He also shares some great thoughts about his actual brother, MEGATRON.

The writer didn’t do the ultimate justice to CY by displaying his intelligence. I blame that on the writer and the editors. They are in the business of selling magazines to a demographic that they think doesn’t deserve intelligent and profound journalism. Either that or the writer was just a hump.

I promise that in the upcoming weeks I will continue to give you the real life stories of my brothers as they tried to find their way through New York City. I won’t glamorize them and I won’t apologize for them either. They were simply young people with an undeniable well of energy and not enough information on how to to be proactive and progressive. Many of these kids paid the ultimate price and those of us that remain now understand our duty to the collective and the community.

Peace to…

cyclonus
BIG CY

RUMBLE
RUM(ble)

MENASOR
MENASOR

MANDELLO
MANDELLO

'STRONG
HEADSTRONG

TIM STONE
TIM STONE

ASTROTRAIN
ASTROTRAIN

BABY FACE FINSTER
BABY FACE

KEITH CAT
KEITH ‘BATTLECAT’

V'ILL
V’ILL BLACK

SCATTERBLAST
‘SCATTERBLAST’ JACK

TRUCK
TRUCK

DEVASTATOR
DEVASTATOR

BRUTICUS
BRUTICUS

When I was in high school I couldn’t wait for springtime. Actually I couldn’t wait for anytime. The city was like a big playground all year long, but springtime held special interest. There was the Milrose Games at Madison Square Garden. Guaranteed track and field poohnahnee. You might meet a cheerleader chick from Teaneck, New Jersey whose parents had a big house with a carpeted basement. That, my friends, was called high school ‘poon’ jackpot.

There was also the Walk-A-Thon. Tens of thousands of people walked around Manhattan to raise money for a cure for Multiple Sclerosis. If you pulled a few folks together with the like mind to get some paper, you could put in some good work along the route. The throngs of people also provided cover when the heat was on. By the time you reached the end of the route at Central Park, you had a backpack full of pilfered goods. Clothing, sneakers, jewelry, food…Everything was for the taking.

With this kind of grab azz atmosphere, you can imagine that everybody was out and about. There was another group of young men who were essentially our mortal enemies. We would always encounter them at big events like the Walk-A-Thon. They were called the A-Team because that was the subway line they rode. They came from an area in Brooklyn called East New York, more specifically the Cypress Hills and Harold Pink housing developments. East New York has been one of New York City’s grittiest and gulliest neighborhoods since the blackout in 1977. Even during the police state Rudy Giuliani era, E.N.Y. led the city in homicides and violent crimes. The kids that came from this neighborhood were tough as shit because that was the only way they could survive.

The A-Team had kids named after animals like OX, HORSE, PIG and DOG. One dude named GUADO had a flattop cut and always kept a shank on him. Of all these dudes, the most fearsome was a kid named DRAC, short for Dracula. He got the nickname because he had NO FRONT TEETH! To top that off, he had pointed gold caps on his incisors. And he was tall as shit. And he was black and ugly. And mean. Now I wonder if this kid was always that mean or if he became that way because of how everyone viewed him and responded to him on sight.

The A-Team and my brothers were familiar with each other because we crossed paths constantly. Friday night would find us all at a downtown Hip-Hop club called Union Square. And then the same people would go to the Times Square area on Saturday night to the Latin Quarter. Familiarity breeds contempt and these dudes hated us with a passion. What helped us in dealing with them was the simple fact that we had too much posse. When things got set off, we had an advantage because they didn’t account for the kids dressed like preppies who were down with us.

The Walk-A-Thon was a different scene because the madness that my brothers and the A-Team usually visited upon each other would now spill out and affect the ‘other’. The ‘other’ were people who lived in the city and never encountered foolish, angry Black youth. They didn’t tuck in their jewelry or protect their valuables because they never felt they had to. They had never witnessed the savages at work. What happened next on this particular spring day at the Walk-A-Thon would transform any lifelong Liberal voter into a staunch Republican.

My brothers and the A-Team spotted each other through the crowd of thousands at Central Park. MEGATRON and some of the brothers positioned themselves in the center of the crowd. Once they were in place, he yelled out the command for the mayhem to commence. The desperate explosion of testosterone was overwhelming. In every direction people began fighting and yelling in random emphatic outbursts. In this uncontrollable atmosphere, the flatfoot police had to give way to the mounted officers. The horses whinied and stood up on their hind legs. My brothers scuffled with the A-Team as well as the jakes in plainclothes. ASTROTRAIN punched a horse in the jaw. The scene was like something from a classic old western town brawl, where everyone is getting punched out from their blindside. We had ladies with us who were as gully as any dude. They were using their hands as well as hammers and boxcutters. Then the large police wagons screeched into the park and riot gear police jumped out. Everyone scrambled.

I escaped from the clutches of the police with some of my brothers. We hopped the subway at Columbus Circle. Thankfully, no one had been stabbed or shot. There were a few bumps and bruises but no one in the collective needed any serious medical attention. We rode the subway home as exuberant as when the day began. I was happy because I still had my Eastpack backpack and all my loot.

WE BUILT THIS CITY… (ReMix)

Thursday, March 23rd, 2006

my name is...

The New York Historical Society has spent a grip of money on what could have been a meaningful, dynamic and far reaching exhibit titled “Slavery in New York”. The exhibit could have told the story of how the chattel slave trade allowed America to usurp the position of world power from the British by exploiting a base of free labor for the over 300 hundred years that it was in place. The exhibit could have told the story of the slaves that constructed the wall in lower Manhattan that was designed to fend off pirates and Indians. That location would later be known as Wall Street.

The story of Slavery in America has been opened by scholars before but I was excited to see a discussion of the subject as it was related to Early New Yorker’s mercantile successes.

Everyone likes to think of slavery as a phenomenon exclusive to the American South. And while it is true that the majority of the slave population existed in the South, the difference between North and South was probably less than the percentage by which Bush stole the election.

In fact, New York was the largest slave-holding state in the North. Brooklyn? Plantation city. Ditto for Queens, Long Island and Upper Manhattan. Funny thing is, not that much has changed. Only the jig masters now go by North Face and Starbucks instead of Hamilton and Lefferts.

The letdown for me with what could have been a powerful exhibit was the fact that so many names were withheld. Where are the Carnegies, the Vanderbilts, the DuPonts? For crissakes, where the hell are the Rockerfellers?!? No one controls more New York jigs today than the Rockerfeller family.

ROC-A-FELLA y’all.

Jamaicans ARE NOT the Gulliest Immigrants! (ReMix)

Wednesday, March 22nd, 2006

the prez

As I was reading the free newspaper that they hand out before you get on the subway, I caught an interesting editorial trick. In an article about the NYC policeman who was recently murdered, they made sure to note that the alleged assailant is Jamaican. This fact will presumably have no bearing in court. However, it appears that in the jury of public consensus this man is already guilty. This started me to thinking about what Caribbean island fields the gulliest, most gator batch of immigrants. You might be surprised, but Jamaica isn’t even in the top three, despite the fact that they can run a 200m sprint barefoot.

haiti boy

haiti boy still dead

The Caribbean island with the gulliest would-be immigrants has to be Haiti. These fools have been known to sit on a single car tire and try to float to Florida. They have also been known to take that same tire, fill it up with gasoline, set it on fire and then place it on top of people during a political disagreement. Of all the knuckleheads that I know personally, dudes like HAITIAN MIGUEL and HAITIAN GREGGS are problem children.

mike is crazy

The second gulliest Caribbean island is definetly Cuba for the simple fact that CASTRO has refused to join this American gravy train. Plus the Cubans do reederkulezz shiite to get on American soil. My buddy CUBAN MARK told me the story of his crazy father coming to the U.S. on a raft during the height of the missile crisis. CUBAN is one of the dudes most likely to hit you over the head with a raft when he and BILLY SUNDAY have been on a drinking binge.

Pushing the Jamaicans out of the top three is the upstart upscale resort island of Aruba. I mean, the island is only 70 square miles and they still haven’t found this broad?

natalee

Art or Commercial Bullshiite? (ReMix)

Wednesday, March 22nd, 2006

fitty

A few months ago we nailed home the concept that this Hip-Hop shit wasn’t thorough enough to be called a culture. After reading the latest Vanity Fair rag I found out that the Hip-Hop that I was brought up on wasn’t even art. Its all commercial bullshiite.

The Vanity Fair article detailed the true story of the Robinson family, the founders of SugarHill Records. The story decribed how the Robinson family was indebted up to their eyeballs to the T.I. mafia. They were desperate to find that ‘next nigger shit’. SYLVIA ROBINSON goes to the legendary Harlem World nightclub to see what kind of disco music the jigs are vibing to. She experiences a Hip-Hop party and right then she knows that she has stumbled onto her pot of gold. She can’t understand what is being said by the emcees and she could care less, all she knows is that this thing is going to be huge. She runs back to New Jersey and literally picks up three jigs off the street and brings them to her home studio. Listening to ‘Rapper’s Delight’ it wasn’t hard to tell that the music was stolen from the CHIC classic ‘Good Times’, but the hammer that was dropped on my head is this… most of the ryhmes used for the song were stolen from the rhymebook of GRANDMASTER CAZ. One of the emcees on the record was a manager for COLD CRUSH BROTHERS and asked CAZ if he could borrow his rhymebook for a meeting he had in New Jersey. CAZ thought that he might be getting put on so he gave up his book to that loser. How apropo is it that the very first incarnation of recorded Hip-Hop has jigs stealing other jigs creative talent? I won’t even complain now when JAY-Z does a cover of B.I.G.’s ‘Juicy’.

Fast forward to the present and Hip-Hop, ne, crap music is a global phenomenon in how it mobilizes and motivates the youth. Crap music determines what is of value to these kids. It constantly tells them what to buy. What has become even more insipid is that crap music tells people what to think and how to react. The pathos of ‘Get Rich or Die Trying’ is that you would do anything for money. That life has a transferrable price in dollars and cents. 50 CENTS.

CURTIS JACKSON is crap music’s greatest prophet for profit because he has maximized his popularity by being this multimedia juggernaut. You can’t turn away from the 50 CENTS character. The television plays his music videos and then incessantly airs commercials that hype the big screen biopic coming to theaters this month. The radio plays the soundtrack to his videogame. I walk into a bookstore in order to escape the madness and right in the center of the store is an entire table table filled with 50 CENTS’ book. Yes, his book! This last irony forces me to sit down in one of the oversized leather chairs and contemplate the future of the children that I see around me. 50 CENTS considered the only two options for his life were guns or microphones. He never mentioned books.

50 CENT says in one of the voiceovers segments for the movie that he got into crap music because unlike drugs he couldn’t be prosecuted for selling a lot of records. That was the motivation for this ‘bullshiite artist’. Crap music will never again be art. It’s all just commercial bullshiite.

Has Anyone Seen My UNCLE TOM? (ReMix)

Tuesday, March 21st, 2006

UNCLE T

Only a few years ago my UNCLE TOM was a supernova on the American political landscape. He was so hot that even some white folks considered inviting him over to their house for dinner. You know, to actually sit and eat, not to buss the table.

The next thing I knew, Uncle Tom and Aunt Jemima weren’t getting along in the big house. It looked like my Uncle Tom would have to go back to doing field work. But something happened on the way out of the big house’s backdoor. I really hope that my Uncle Tom didn’t trip on one of massa’s shotguns or hang himself by accident with one of massa’s Jack Ketch collars.

One thing is for sure. I haven’t heard nor seen neither hide nor hair of my Uncle Tom.