Archive for June, 2006

PIMPS UP, HO’s DOWN PROM PIX

Thursday, June 15th, 2006

ho prom

I firmly believe that one day when Blacks have been finally removed from the American landscape the same way that the native Americans were you will be able to visit Madame Tussaud’s wax museum to see what those people had looked like. The images will prah’lee look like these kids who are about to graduate from the Pimps Up, Ho’s Down High School located in every city.

These kids are the future of Black America and they represent the overwhelming number of the best and brightest that is being produced. Keep in mind that these are the kids that are GRADUATING from high school. My advice to any single Black females that read this piece of shit blog is that you need to hurry up and find yourself ‘Something New‘. The story is almost over for Black people.

ho prom

ho prom

ho prom

ho prom

ho prom

The BeYONCE Factor In Real Life

Thursday, June 15th, 2006

holler

Let’s face it party people, BeYONCE KNOWLES is one of those rare once in a millenium occurences. She is like the unicorn and the tooth fairy combined. She can’t be duplicated, replicated or cloned. But despite all of that some of you will try.

BeYONCE’s greatest asset(pun wholly intended) is her ginormous boonkey. Even J.Ho had to bow down to the omnipotent azz that Mz.B owns. Is it any wonder that this summer’s most popular beach accesory after sunblock is a brand new out the box BeYONCE booty?

bootylift

bootylift

bootylift

All I have to say is “Stop the MADNESS!!!

THE NEW CLASSICS…

Wednesday, June 14th, 2006

lighthouse

The last time that the ADDICT kicked it with y’all it was over some rugby jerseys. Since we are about to jump into the summer season I say we get with a few of the sickest knits I have seen so far.

RALPH LAUREN has returned to making classic graphic print knits. While these I.T.’s don’t reach the levels of the great ‘Golf’ and ‘Tennis’ graphics from 1992 they are still sharp and crispy when matched up with your favorite Air Max or Dunks.

octopus

lobster

The Holy Grail classic for this summer will be the ‘NYC Nations’ knit polo. Embroidered graphics on the front and back are for all the true heads that still rep the lifestyle.

nations front

nations back

The War On The Poor

Wednesday, June 14th, 2006

crillz

Do you understand that the ‘War on Drugs’ only targets the most vulnerable, defenseless people? How come we don’t prosecute the companies that manufacture the tiny plastic vials?

What would you use that vial for if you weren’t filling it with crack cocaine. There is nothing that you can store in a crack vial. It’s the equivalent of a water bottle for a mouse. At least you can use the tiny plastic ‘nickel bag’ ziploc bags to hold a spare button for your sweater, but the plastic red top vial has only one use – to transport illegal drugs.

We attempt to fight terrorism comprehensively by targeting the sources of funding that terror networks use. This makes sense because those monetary bases facilitate terrorism. The plastic crack vial facilitates drug trafficking and abuse. We should use our voices to bring these manufacturing criminals to justice instead of just focusing on the poor youth that are consumed by the illegal trade of narcotics.

crillz

Crushing On You…

Wednesday, June 14th, 2006

crush on you

Crushes make the world go round. They get you up in the morning and into the shower on time. You spend an extra minute with the loofa hitting up that azz crack until it shines. You wash behind your ears and brush your teeth extra careful. But what about a crush where the possibility of you seeing that person in person is somewhere in between zero and… negative zero?!?

In all honesty, those are my favorite crushes because I am never let down by my fantasy. The person that I am digging remains pristine and unflawed. Forever perfect. I am having a crush right now on an artist chick from Kenya (didn’t I tell y’all it was all about Kenyan broads this summer?!?). She was featured on my cousin Glamazon’s site just a few days ago. After I did the knowledge I realized that she was the chick that I have been waiting to meet for 36 years. She has this wicked playful sense of humor and she is smart as all get out. Her name is WANGECHI MUTU and you need to back the fuck up.

crush on you

WANGECHI was trained as a sculptor and schooled for anthropology, but her heart brought her to New York City to study fine art at Cooper Union. She graduated from Cooper and went to Yale to secure a Masters of Fine Art. Her work takes a serious and satirical look at the damage that Western idealogy has wrought upon the African continent’s cultural identity. She strikes back at the European image of beauty with her collages that resemble amputations, prosthetics, futuristic transplants and bionic body types in surreal and sometimes hallucinogenic settings.

crush on you

WANGECHI gets it all in the global sense. She sees that people are regarded much like disposable vessels to be stripped down and exploited and then discarded. WANGECHI searches through the cultural wasteland that has become modern day Africa and pulls the dismembered pieces together to form her own exquisite corpse.

crush on you

WANGECHI MUTU is the logical evolution of ROMARE BEARDEN. She has taken the art of collage making to a place that it hasn’t occupied. Just like ROMARE used his collages to describe the vibrance and humility of rural and urban Blacks. WANGECHI has crafted a beautiful mosaic of work that at once explains the frailty and the ferociousness of femininity.

harlem

I love her mind so much that I may have to introduce myself when I see her in Brooklyn this summer. Then again, I probably won’t because I don’t think I want to ruin this crush I’m having.

crush on you